Grown so ugly.

I think I should fix my bike and start riding it.

Oh, and the increased serotonin production that walking will induce, plus the helpful effects of physical exhaustion will do wonders for that insomnia. There's a difference between mental exhaustion (the kind you get from working) and physical. If you walk, you will notice your energies level rise markedly.

Always eat something in the morning. The sooner you eat and exercise, the sooner you start burning calories. If you drink soda, switch to diet. If you eat chips, switch to pretzels.

Walk to things when you can, if you normally drive and walking is practical; you're more likely to stick with habits which incidentally include exercise than exercise for its own sake. And if you wake up slowly, that's a good time to get some basic exercises (situps, pushups, knee bends, simple weights, whatever -- situps would probably be best) in, cause you won't be awake enough yet to resent it :)

Worked for me.

Use very hot water to prep your face before shaving; this is important. Use gels/foams/aftershave balms with no alcolhol, fragrance or preservatives (try the specialty grocery stores obv.)

You could just have extremely sensitive skin, of course.

Oh, and unless there's some very new research -- nutrasweet is only a health risk if you're drinking loads of it. If you're drinking loads of soda, that's a problem right there -- switching to juice isn't likely to help with weight loss since many juices have the same calorie count anyway.

Or so I've heard.

I love how this thread alternates between shaving techniques and diet advice.

I have a terrible diet and do no exercise, and although I don't put on fat, I am a horrible shape. I have a big belly. It's not fat - I've had two explanations for it, both relating to my very bad asthma. One suggested that years and years of forcing the diaphragm more and more pushed the belly out, the other points out that steroids give people bulging bellies, which is fact, and I've been on substantial doses of steroidal asthma drugs for over thirty years. An odd side effect is that when I get ill I lose weight and my stomach gets bigger! Then I get better, and put weight on, my stomach shrinks back and people tell me I've lost weight.

I have lots of other very unattractive aspects too - legs so short it's nearly freakish, very protruding ears, a nose that underwent three operations when I was a kid, so that I could breathe through it, that looks as if it was badly broken, toes that are only gradually recovering from a mother who knew best and ignored me when I said shoes were too small, so they became curled down and inwards like a claw. I expect I've forgotten a few things too. The only thing that has become worse as my years have advanced (and I am of course far older than Amateurist) is that my jaw's become a bit saggy and my hair is receding and thinning a lot. It makes for a pretty damned unattractive whole.

Sounds to me like it's my own personal nemesis, rosacea. It's probably not a bad idea to see a dermatologist about that and the razor burns.

As for shaving, try shaving from the bottom up, just pull the skin real tight first. It's difficult to explain but involves reaching over your head with your free hand and pulling at loose skin.

As for exercise, let me know if you find something that works. I detest sport/exercise, I really thought I'd never have to bother. Until a year ago I was freakishly skinny - gave up smoking and put on like 2-3 stone. People ask if I've been working out or tell me I look good, but I just look down at my belly and think urgghh - fat twat.
I know I must do something before I lose sight of my feet.

I need to get back to using a regular razor; this electric shaver is just a mess. I'll buy myself a new razor and try some of the advice given upthread. Sometimes I'm tempted to grow a beard and be done with it, but I hate wearing a beard. Any advice for razors to buy for someone with a really rough beard and sensitive skin?

When I was living with other folks I was more self-aware and my habits weren't so out of whack. Living alone gives me too much room to indulge my laziness.

yeah this is important, too: use a double- or triple-blade razor, all tarted up with lubri-strips and whisker-erecting fins and stuff. Like a Gillette Sensor or MACH III. Just avoid single blade, plastic disposables like the plague.

Although 'shaving with fruit' also seems like pretty U&K advice.

Oh, and dispose of the blade when it needs to be disposed -- no matter how good the razor is, a dull blade is a dull blade, and that especially makes a difference since you have a rough beard.

Didn't we have a shaving thread? I think ILE is where I picked up the hot water thing.

It's not advised! You're doing it right. (see 'Barcelona')

I've bought one of those self-assembly abdominizing gyms for 30 bucks, taken up badminton classes, cut way back on beer and started a banana-only diet.

What more can a man do?

give up. no, not really.

I work out 3 days a week or every other day depending on time constraints on my own laziness factor. Lately I haven't been because preparing dinner and learning statistics have been occupying my time. But I just do one or two sets of calisthenics, flutter kicks, pushups, diamond pushups, crunches (situps are bad!) and reverse pushups. Lots of stretching.

I don't gain weight, though, because my metabolism is a rocket. So no help there. But staying toned is just a matter of giving a shit, it really is. You can always find 30 minutes to chop out of your day and once you get into a rhythm it's pretty easy to warm up, burn yourself out and warm down even within that brief timspan.

Flutter kicks are your friend.

For moisturising after shaving--Cetaphil cream is excellent for sensitive skin. It's the only stuff I can use that doesn't sting like hell when I have razor burn on my legs. I use it on my face too, though if you don't have extremely dry skin you'd probably want the lotion. Good moisturisers are sometimes more expensive, but worth it. Aveeno lotion is another really good, gentle moisturiser. I have used every fucking moisturiser ever for my superdry, sensitive skin, and those two are the best IMO.

It's easy to get critical/overaware of appearance stuff, especially if your appearance has changed. But you probably don't look as bad as you think you do. With friends of mine that complain about weight gain, sometimes I don't even notice until they point it out. Even then, it always seems to me that they look just fine.

Do as many as you can stand, obviously. Back at my peak I think my cycle was thus:

1. superman crunches (lie facedown, lift up your head and put yr arms out in front, then use yr lower back to pull yr upper body off the ground)
1. reverse pushups
2. flutter kicks
3. pushups
4. crunches
5. diamond pushups (save the worst for last)

try cooking for yourself for relaxation when you get home from work. you can make the spices and sauces interesting so you don't need to eat as much, and it's fun.

Exercise - get a pair of running shoes and run. For the first week or so, just go as far as you can until you feel you're about to die - even if you can only run for 5 minutes. Then stop and walk a bit. Go out and do this every day. Soon you'll be able to run further, the pounds will drop away and you'll feel so much better, both mentally and physically.

I used to do this, as I live alone too, and would stay online until 2 or 3 in the morning. Kate's advice is perfect. I started walking to work and university, occasionally go to the gym when I can be bothered, and I feel so much better for it. I get properly tired, like physically rather than mentally, and I sleep much better. Also, what Kate said about the seratonin and all that. My mood is better, and I have more energy, just from a half hour walk every day.

But with biking you get outside...there's those paths along the lake in Chicago that would be great with the weather warming up...

Time measured in Hopkinsecs?

As usual, though, I have nothing valuable to add.

I've been playing football twice a week for the last few months, and although I am still larger than I'd like to be, that's because I've got complacent with the beer and curries knowing that I'm doing lots of exercise (I also cycle and occasionally swim, too - hurray for the non-winter seasons!). But I love it - it's a focus, it's something to look forward to, it's a challenge, and it has only benefits (apart from the rather frequent niggly injuries - I'm laid up with a collateral ligament injury in my left knee caused by trying to match Jerry the Nipper's superb quick turn).

Also, give up snacking if you do it. Fizzy drinks, sweets, crisps - almost entirely bad for you from a nutritional standpoint, and you'll enjoy your meals that much more. If you need to treat yourself, do it in the form of a special meal - even if it's lardier, there's bound to be more health benefits than pigging out on coke or nachos.

I found a SWIMMING COSTUME and am thinking about going SWIMMING but then also think of things like HAIR ALL OVER BODY and quite frankly getting rid of it all just to jump in some water is a bit rub. What I need is my own personal BEACH. PLaying in the water is fun. I used play a macabre game called DEATH where I tried to float face down on the pool surface for as long as I could to see if I could fake drowning if need be....

I could do it for quite a long time! I managed to train my LUNGS well. No doubt I'd be bolloxed now though.

yr far from ugly, mitch. i remember your picture because you kind of look like someone i know.

I assumed they wd miss with their gunfire - or they wd not even need to fire cos I would be drowned already.

YOU NEVER KNOW WHEN THEY WILL STRIKE

I am 25 and am incredibly pale and a bit flabby despite having sticks for legs. But I know I just need a good bit of sunshine and exercise and I'll be happy as can be like in the secret garden.

Lixi - do we have a neu local swimming pool? I did aqua aerobics a couple of times you know. It's good! You get to do a very silly workout and then afterwards you get to mess about in the pool doing handstands or practising being a drowned corpse, whatever takes yr fancy.

I think I have forgotten to do a roll turn. Bah humbug.

And if everything he says is true, he might be out-of-shape enough to make a good running partner for me! Whaddayasay, let's get together over by the lake and do, say, 500 yards every weekend? Then maybe some cigarettes and chili cheese dogs.

(I love you really!!!)

http://www.artouest.org/web/gainsnet/imagesite/photos/gainsbar.jpg

i think the photos i've posted here are really flattering compared to what i "really" look like. i photograph pretty well. i don't videotape well. unfortunately, i trust tv.

(uh, no I don't)

"95 heat wave" = 1995, when it was up to 110 degrees I believe.

(Note: none of the above are true.)

Actually I got in some trouble at camp. I was playing tag with several campers when they decided it would be fun to all jump on me at once while I was sitting down on the grass. One overzealous girl leaped right onto my arm. As I heard the crack I yelled, "God DAMN it!" Oops. Luckily there was a hospital around the corner and I got patched up alright.

http://images.rottentomatoes.com/images/movie/coverv/09/102609.jpg

My overriding impression of myself has always been 'BLEAH.' But it builds up from there.

I am more in shape than I have been since christmas, I think.

Not only is this impossible, but it won't work.

i don't think i'm ugly

but i don't think i'm like stunning either. it's that midway point that gets so confusing, see.

i don't know anymore

oh god i'm being emo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_jizu9Li--I

Hahaha surm thinking he's ugly is like a glass of freshly-squeezed orange juice saying "I am not refreshing or satisfying, no one will find me delicious"

A glass of orange juice with, like, the cutesy imaginable.

And like we're not even talking the impeccable sense of style (omg the pearls) but you've got a pretty unique and lovely bone structure as well

xp that was supposed to say "the cutest frames"

I had Fred Savage Syndrome around the years of 18-20, went from being an adorable little kid to having a horse face. during an internet squabble between two boards, someone found my college pic and posted it to taunt me for being ugly.

by 24-25 I started to look somewhat normal again and in the last few years, once I've shed the shaggy look, I've been attractive to more people, so I guess I thank nature for this.

i looked really baby-faced in my late teens and early 20s, i got ID'd everywhere until i was about 25. so i'm actually glad to be 29, i at least look like a grown man.

wait til yr 39- I'm on the tipping point now- I don't really like either of two alternatives that seem sort of glaring- the "let yourself go" model of instantly getting a gut and a double chin and just thinking, "fuck it, time to go to pot" OR the crazy narcissistic gym queen with a million moisturizers school of "fighting aging"- at least for gay men there are so many people who fall into this weird trap and they tend to pick Door #2- they turn into what I call "neckdowns"- they have the body of a 20 year old from the neck down, and then there's this weird middle aged head tacked on top with a sad, haunted expression, usually covered with an Abercrombie baseball cap, as they try not to be what they are: 30s/40s.

then I look at pictures of Samuel Beckett and think "old dudes are awesome"

http://www.johnminihan.com/resources/images/beckett/large/Samuel%20Beckett%20in%20room%20604%20of%20The%20Hyde%20Park%20Hotel,%20London%201980%20%282%29.jpg

Man, I wish I still looked like the pic I complainingly posted in 2005 ... well, hairline excepted I guess I still do. Late 20s/early 30s so far so good. Think that's true of a lot of people; just having shaken off the last of the awkward years.

the tune in space u look good for ur age. u have nice skin, and boyish features.

i otoh will inevitably follow in the footsteps of my grandmother: all nose, eyes and hair.

*is space

i still get carded, and i'm 26. when i shave, i could be 18.

i'm getting a gym membership today. i want more muscle.

also the tune is space otm, re those two positions. i find it equally creepy when older dudes look like 21 year olds under their shirts. like, it's rad to have a fit, nice body at any age, but act and dress your age, old queens.

my hair has gotten so thin since I graduated from high school ;_;

but I dunno I find ways to work around it

for some reason, i think i'm lucking out on that front and not inheriting my mom's family's baldness gene. my hair is very thin, tho.

i think i'm happier with the way i look with each passing year tbh (/youthful hubris)

This turned into another gay thread, huh.

u know what i think

Gays u r all fabulous! I see ur WDYLL's and I have not vomited or recoiled even once. Not. once. :D

still get carded, and i'm 26

i actually still occassionally get carded, and i'm 42 (more likely explanation; someone's blind). i have these same fears about having "lost it," too, although, to be fair, i'm not sure i ever had "it." the whole notion it really makes me sad, and then i feel worse for feeling vain. but there's more to life, and there's ways to feel better about oneself.

ugh u UGLY freaks!!!

sorry... i didnt mean that...

I'm happier with the way I look now (36) compared to when I was younger, but it's more to do with being more comfortable being myself generally. And also being more able to tell haters to shove off.

i'm 30 and I got carded regularly if I was clean shaven until I was 26-27. now I never get carded either way.

I've never been carded - no idea why.

re: guys dressing too young.

it is kinda weird/embarrassing to see 30 and 40 something fellas with stupid spiky boyband hair, distressed denim and graphic tees. although that might be how they've just dressed since 1995, i dunno.

it's not even depressing as much as it is just unflattering

i havent been carded since i was 17, ppl always think im older than i am.

I don't think I can really even approach this thread earnestly w/o being really depressive/bleak/truthbomby but suffice to say I've somehow managed to get over (or rather come to terms with) a lot of own insecurities w/r/t this topic. But i mean even ppl on Ilx have been like "holy shit that dude's ugly" (bcz they didn't realize it was a photo of me)

okay I have to stop reading this before i spiral

Hey Stevie- hugs?

I have learned to embrace my descent into balding gray-beardedness. Huzzah for wrinkles and age-spotty hands!

Some days I feel haggard and fugly but others I feel like I'm finally growing into my face. Could do with a bit less face to grow into, like, but hey new year new resolve to bun dem calorie.

^^^ up until I was 7 I had 'my' face, but from that point onwards I had someone else's face in a way. Since late 20's I've gradually got my face back again.

stevie u rule, fuck the haters

Stevie you kinda look like my nephew and he's awesome and beautiful so you know what he ^^^ just said

kind of just waiting around til the genetic inevitability of fat head/ face (a la Alec Baldwin) is finally realized :/

surely there are worse ways to go than old alec baldwin?

I have learned to embrace my descent into balding gray-beardedness.

― Aimless, Sunday, 2 January 2011 20:18 (1 hour ago) Bookmark

I've descended and landed with a bump, it's not too bad to be honest, there are many others here.

oh absolutely. but of course he was a damned handsome dude to start with. i'm fair-o-middling at best.

just using AB as a shorthand for that weird head/face thing that happens to some men, even if they don't end up especially overweight. blaming my maternal grandfather for that. HUEG head.

xpost

Val Kilmer to thread :/

haha yes!! an even better example.

my father and stepmother are both plastic surgeons, so I'm made especially aware of the temptation people have to meddle with their own aging and kinda get a vibe from hanging out with them about what is and is not realistic about the current surgical techniques people use to fuck with this natural process

it was super weird when I spotted that my father had had a blepharoplasty (reducing the amount of eyelid fold/overhang)- he looked a lot less like my grandmother and aunts and uncles- it removed a certain family resemblance that we all share and that was odd to say the least

I find that weirdly taut lifted "look" very tacky- but then so do my parents, and they say you can only tell that someone has had a facelift when it's a bad job in the first place, i.e. a good surgeon won't get a result that looks superfake and noticeably extreme like that

There's not much that can fundamentally be done to alter the way that the soft tissues of the face just do slacken and fold with time- but looking over the pre- and post-op photos of my parents cases, I will say that there are people in their 40s/50s/60s who look *massively* better after getting their chin done

I used to snicker in my 20s at the very idea of such surgery, and now I can totally imagine the mindset that, with the disposable income, would just go for it

age changes your perspective on this stuff pretty massively

note to self: stop saying "massively' so much

"voluminously" in oh-eleven

discovered my first gray mustache hairs today after nearly a decade with gray in my beard

All gray all the time on my head now. I stopped paying attention

think i got used to being unattractive tbh, it's not such a bad mindset to be in once you get past your teens.

the tune is the space and surm are goodlookin dudes by any standard, let's be serious here. stevied always looks cool as fuck in any pics i see too tbph.

I wonder how much of one's low self image has to do with the prominence of digital cameras now, cuz it seems every time I take a photo with my digicam it accentuates all the weird red places, shiny greasiness, and pock-marks on my face — whereas when I look into a mirror I think I look pretty okay, but when I see photos I'm like "I look like *that*?"

also Stevie you already know what I think, but you are way cute

I dont really like photos of myself which is why I hardly ever post to WDYLL threads. ILXORs be v photogenic overall though. Corey ur cute as a bug, yr photos are A+

thx ^_^

i think i've posted twice to the WDYLL thread, in part because of the "non-photogenic" reason (and in part for the "basic gist of this thread title"-reason).

hold a sec daniel esq aren't you the dude that looks 10 yrs younger than his actual age?

But I think we are our own worst critics, and the things that bum us out about how we look are things that friends & ppl close to us dont see. Personality is the best concealer IMO ;)

i look younger than i am, yeah (but less-and-less so i'm sure).

my son's best friend took several random photos of me at dinner on nye in conversation/listening mode and OMG I looked grotesque, like a combination of frankenstein & keith richards corpse. he was trying to catch me at random/awkward moments (15 y.o. LOLz) and I'm not offended but I was like 'do i really look like that?'

i've always laughed women into bed myself, tbh, shortly before they laugh me out of it again ;_;

Laughing all the way

Yeah I never felt like I could use my "looks" for much of anything. Always conversation, music/ films/ books etc for me. Or 5+ years of email in the case of Mr Veg

my father and stepmother are both plastic surgeons, so I'm made especially aware of the temptation people have to meddle with their own aging and kinda get a vibe from hanging out with them about what is and is not realistic about the current surgical techniques people use to fuck with this natural process

it was super weird when I spotted that my father had had a blepharoplasty (reducing the amount of eyelid fold/overhang)- he looked a lot less like my grandmother and aunts and uncles- it removed a certain family resemblance that we all share and that was odd to say the least

I find that weirdly taut lifted "look" very tacky- but then so do my parents, and they say you can only tell that someone has had a facelift when it's a bad job in the first place, i.e. a good surgeon won't get a result that looks superfake and noticeably extreme like that

There's not much that can fundamentally be done to alter the way that the soft tissues of the face just do slacken and fold with time- but looking over the pre- and post-op photos of my parents cases, I will say that there are people in their 40s/50s/60s who look *massively* better after getting their chin done

I used to snicker in my 20s at the very idea of such surgery, and now I can totally imagine the mindset that, with the disposable income, would just go for it

age changes your perspective on this stuff pretty massively

― the tune is space, Sunday, January 2, 2011 9:46 PM (28 minutes ago) Bookmark

interesting. my uncle's best friend is a plastic surgeon. have you had any work done?

when I look into a mirror I think I look pretty okay, but when I see photos I'm like "I look like *that*?"

sometimes i check my hair or whatever in the mirror and i think 'i look all right! i could take a picture for posterity?' and then i take a picture and it turns out i don't look all right after all. :(

dressing room mirrors are the ultimate in 'i look like that?'

See also: fluorescent lighting

ha yeah, watching yourself trying to get on a new pair of jeans from three directions at once would put you off clother for life

Nagl

I demand candlelight at all times

I'm kinda pissed off with the last few years because I am perfectly happy with my body and my face in general (I'm sure I'd look cute if I had a nose job, but that's not me) but somehow this chubbiness has kind of appeared under my chin and nowhere else and I haven't gained much weight on my body or anything (was always v skinny, now small but properly proportioned) so it seems that if I want to lose it I'd have to have surgery or try and diet until my body was super-thin. Like, I have my normal chin still but the bit between that and my neck hangs down slightly and it never used to. I'm making it sound really horrible and it's not, it's just the unfairness of it that it just appeared without my permission!

interesting. my uncle's best friend is a plastic surgeon. have you had any work done?

― surm, Sunday, January 2, 2011 5:17 PM (18 minutes ago) Bookmark

No. even if I wanted to, and (i think, could be wrong here) the Hippocratic oath bars family members from operating on other members of their own family anyway so there are no family bargains on offer

I think in the next ten years I'm narcissistic enough to be tempted to get my chin done but only if I had
a) the time to waste sitting around feeling and looking like shit for a month while healing from surgery
and b) obscene mountains of cash so that I really wouldn't care about squandering 6-8k on surgery for something elective and vain like this

then you think about the people who get nasty complications and/or die when things go wrong and it just seems very much not worth it

be realistic about the fact that you're going to change and love yourself anyway, I reckon

also ppl with a lot of money get really shit plastic surgery all the time so its not like if you pay enough you will get dece results for def

awfulplasticsurgery.com is full of examples.

how fun.

It's more depressing really. They're all famous and (presumably) rich, but they're so unhappy with their appearances that they go in for (often several) surgeries that make them look terrible.

yea i was being sarcastic.

Ppl that have loads of surgery all and up looking sort of the same, that awful Jocelyn Wildebeest look where they're all shiny and stretched like melted Barbie doll faces. I imagine them being v sad strange ppl

own yr ugliness imo

i have a feeling that a lot of that awful plastic surgery is the result of people shooting for the moon - you can do a lot of little things that wont make you look like a piece of molded plastic, but if you try and go from proverbial/literal A-cup to double D it's gonna be a disaster no matter what - the result of 'good' plastic surgery can often be pleasing or at least inoffensive, but the process is still stomach churning to me, i dont even know how to digest phrases like 'facial bone grinding surgery'

a 35-year old woman died during liposuction surgery in south-florida last week. just fyi.

Yikes

yeah. story

heartbreaking and a valuable cautionary story.

My fat is staying right where it is thanks very much. Keeping me warm atm

happens a lot, doesnt it? they're dangerous surgeries!

No. even if I wanted to, and (i think, could be wrong here) the Hippocratic oath bars family members from operating on other members of their own family anyway so there are no family bargains on offer

I think in the next ten years I'm narcissistic enough to be tempted to get my chin done but only if I had
a) the time to waste sitting around feeling and looking like shit for a month while healing from surgery
and b) obscene mountains of cash so that I really wouldn't care about squandering 6-8k on surgery for something elective and vain like this

then you think about the people who get nasty complications and/or die when things go wrong and it just seems very much not worth it

be realistic about the fact that you're going to change and love yourself anyway, I reckon

― the tune is space, Sunday, January 2, 2011 10:43 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark

yea i once decided i will def get my chin done if i have to.

I read V. and my mom and I talked a couple days later abt plastic surgery –– I paraphrased the nose job chapter and she said, "Honey, you aren't schooling me, I've watched Oprah."

As far as the gen thread question, I have never felt attractive BUT I have never really cared abt it either, if that makes sense? I have gotten over feeling insecure when around v beautiful women, which I think just came from v pretty girls being v mean to me back in escuela.

every time I take a photo with my digicam it accentuates all the weird red places, shiny greasiness, and pock-marks on my face — whereas when I look into a mirror I think I look pretty okay, but when I see photos I'm like "I look like *that*?"

so otm

and to NTRVP - i have begun to develop that turkey chin thing too, all the women on my mum's side have it, and tbh it is probably the one thing of all the things i dislike about my body/face that i would actually have cosmetic surgery to change.

it is kinda weird/embarrassing to see 30 and 40 something fellas with stupid spiky boyband hair, distressed denim and graphic tees. although that might be how they've just dressed since 1995, i dunno.

― carles II of spain (max arrrrrgh), Monday, January 3, 2011 3:45 AM (5 hours ago) Bookmark

http://www.salon.com/life/feature/2006/01/24/jeffries/story.jpg

Ugh that Abercrombie dude is just so albino and wrong

I stepped foot inside an A&F today for the first time ever. It was pretty annoying in every way - just like that dude.

I'm actually pretty worried about this because I've witnessed firsthand how differently people treat one another based on looks. idk. I still look pretty young but almost had a meltdown when I started at my current job because the lighting in the bathroom there is probably the least flattering thing ever and I felt like I'd aged 15 years overnight. Also, I think this whole thing is sadly way harder and more complicated on women than it is on men on the whole.

http://www.jesush.com/i/mikejeffries_ericstoltz.jpg

Hahaha Corey

xp fluorescent lighting is the worst thing ever for self-esteem — it should be banned

Seriously it's seriously awful. I have dark circles (hereditary) and deep set eyes and I looked like I had two shiners the first time I looked in the bathroom mirror there.

lol @ me - did I mention how SERIOUSLY bad it is?

This is the only msg board I know of where many different people will apologize for using the same word twice in a sentence or paragraph.

srsly

:)

i lost 25 pounds in france, and have been steadily gaining it back again. i think i'm better at shaving though. i am going to buy a new bicycle, i think, and ride it around i0wa c1ty.

move-to-france-diet should be more popular, it's almost impossible to gain weight in france for some reason

every time I see this thread I think of Sinead O'Connor singing "grown so ug-uh-ly" in place of "feel so diff-er-ent"

weird, this thread always makes me think it's about a punk song. or jiz or something.

http://www.morrisseydance.com/morrissey-dances.gif

I'm kinda pissed off with the last few years because I am perfectly happy with my body and my face in general (I'm sure I'd look cute if I had a nose job, but that's not me) but somehow this chubbiness has kind of appeared under my chin and nowhere else and I haven't gained much weight on my body or anything (was always v skinny, now small but properly proportioned) so it seems that if I want to lose it I'd have to have surgery or try and diet until my body was super-thin. Like, I have my normal chin still but the bit between that and my neck hangs down slightly and it never used to. I'm making it sound really horrible and it's not, it's just the unfairness of it that it just appeared without my permission!

― Not the real Village People, Sunday, January 2, 2011 10:29 PM (1 week ago)

my case is kinda the opposite of yours. it's not a chin thing, but I just can't seem to gain weight in my face. I was always super-thin growing up, and I tended to be really self-conscious about my sunken cheeks and angular jawline. when I ballooned (relatively speaking) from 130 lbs. to 165 lbs. a few years ago, I looked a bit healthier from the neck down, but my face was as gaunt as ever. not much has changed now that I've gotten down to 140-145 lbs., but I'm afraid I'll end up with really bad wrinkles in a few years because of the way my skin moves when I smile/scowl.

Geez, I'll swap you! I hate my fat face :(

I think today I resolve to embrace all types of ugliness!
It just sounds like a goal that will make me grow.

It is like baptism by fire, but ugliness instead of fire! I give in totally!

In high school my friends and I were obsessed with the cuteness of Japan. We tried to emulate their cute street fashion. But my friend made the GENIUS observation that if we lived there we would probably "embrace ugliness" and hate all things cute. I thought...today...I don't have to move to Nippon to make this real! I have no religion.

enjoy your decline. it's the only reasonable response.
― jess (dubplatestyle), Sunday, March 23, 2003

i never take my own advice.

thankfully this also still seems to be true

my ugliness level is holding steady.
― jess (dubplatestyle), Tuesday, May 6, 2003

n high school my friends and I were obsessed with the cuteness of Japan. We tried to emulate their cute street fashion. But my friend made the GENIUS observation that if we lived there we would probably "embrace ugliness" and hate all things cute. I thought...today...I don't have to move to Nippon to make this real! I have no religion.

― *floods world w/tears* (Abbbottt), Thursday, June 23, 2011 10:39 PM (6 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

i had a friend who did this, mostly in terms of personal style. in thrift stores, etc. she would always spot the ugliest thing in the room and buy it and she'd wear all her ugly items together in various arrangements. the effect was sort of pretty, though. she was v v beautiful so i guess that influenced things.

well beautiful people can wear anything

yeah i guess that is the lesson

except cargo shorts

I <3 this thread.

this phrase pops into my head all the time tbh

haha mine too

I was thinking about this sort of thing today, also, and how liberating dropping all that is. All of it...and how it transforms the way you look at others. I never realized it to such an extent until just earlier today. My entire life more or less has been obsessed with the opposite.

we talked about it in the plastic surgery thread but i'm still v intrigued about the liminal area between socially-deemed necessary cosmetic surgery (my face was shaved off by barbed wire (this is a real case)) and the unnecessary (i want a facelift why because it intersting)

I can't believe I never wound up posting to this thread. Amateurist looks very nice, actually. I know comments like that are no help, since it's less about the reassurance of others than it is about living up to whatever personal potential you're trying to unlock, but . . . Amateurist is great-looking, I think.

And if everything he says is true, he might be out-of-shape enough to make a good running partner for me! Whaddayasay, let's get together over by the lake and do, say, 500 yards every weekend? Then maybe some cigarettes and chili cheese dogs.

― nabisco (nabisco), Tuesday, May 6, 2003 11:23 AM (8 years ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
why don't you just marry him already

― jess (dubplatestyle), Tuesday, May 6, 2003 12:21 PM (8 years ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

lol i miss nabisco

i can't wait to be an old man. like really old. like unable to move around easily, white hair coming out the ears old. i like to think all of this stuff is just a distant memory then.

i miss ms jessica harbl ;_;

i used to say that i couldn't wait to be an old lady but i'm beginning to think i was fronting.

yeah i've been told by friends that i'll make a great cranky old man and used to think warmly of being just that but i just went to the doctor because i sprained my MCL and now i'm like wait getting old is kind of a thing and i need to forestall some of that garbage

yeah i mean this fantasy is sort of predicated on a.) being so old and ugly you just dont care but also b.) having jack lalanne's physique

which doesn't really match up

rip he was a strongo

jack lalanne i mean

i didn't think you were frontin! i think my fantasy was predicated on having lived a v accomplished life.

xxp

so basically we wanna be hideous cranky old people who dont give a shit while also being able to do one-armed push-ups

yes.

And pet our trophies and plaques and degrees whenever we need a break from living in the high desert and solving crimes/righting wrongs.

haha yes and yell at people on the bus because we don't give a fuck

jbr and rrrobyn and I plus I forget who else? are gonna be cane-wielding injustice-fighters. Anyone else who wants to go better get on this train while it's still going!

xp but skip that awkward middle aged period when we're basically adolescent old people

i think it's impt to fight injustice at all ages, so why wait?

I'm just waiting on the cane-wielding part tbh

i saw a guy carrying a cane today who clearly did not need a cane and for a split second i was like "that's not a bad look"

but then i thought about all the accessorizing that would have to go along with a cane

And pet our trophies and plaques and degrees whenever we need a break from living in the high desert and solving crimes/righting wrongs.

― you're in the club and the light hits your ass like pow (Laurel), Thursday, June 23, 2011 10:06 PM (8 minutes ago) Bookmark

this is actually my dream btw

I'm also waiting for my crone stage, when I will gain the power to make people ashamed of their sorry selves with the strength of my withering glare.

really feel like you can already do that, Laurel; i just get a vibe

yeah i think some of these are things we can achieve now

but then i thought about all the accessorizing that would have to go along with a cane

Just get a sword or gun cane, then you won't care.

always wanted to be doc sarvis

http://www.everydaytreats.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/08talk-yaeger-tmagArticle-e1308073734375.jpeg

laurel is no crone but she does have a withering gaze iirc

Is 80:

http://www.everydaytreats.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/cd62_org21-e1308072587156.jpeg

idk - I think being an old woman can be pretty awesome for some people.

well beautiful people can wear anything

― brazenly alive (strongo hulkington's ghost dad), Thursday, June 23, 2011 9:48 PM (27 minutes ago)

yeah i guess that is the lesson

― horseshoe, Thursday, June 23, 2011 9:49 PM (27 minutes ago)

Law 1: Genetics.

http://i43.tower.com/images/mm117186788/10-laws-enduring-success-maria-bartiromo-paperback-cover-art.jpg

This thread is not about Beautiful People, no one is surprised when they are still in the 90th percentile of good looks at any age. This is about embracing the power that comes from surface ugliness, partic that which is brought on by aging past the point when society grants you the privilege of believing in your own allure.

actually i think it was about amateurist having a quarter-life crisis

well there's that

We've moved on. Also I seem to have misplaced my sympathy for 25-yr-olds mourning their lost youth. I can't think where I put it.

well to be fair he's 33 now.

you kids quiet down

i was 25 when i first posted to this thread too, but i had already achieved a zen-like acceptance of my advanced decrepitude

Laurel idk if you were talking about the pics I posted but yeah the 2nd one is clearly a beautiful woman but none of the women in the first are particularly so. What are are those in a bunch of clearly awesome older women who seem to be embracing and rocking their maturity which is why I posted it.

nice thing about mid/late 40s is tossing the illusions overboard and waving as they go down

What are are those in a bunch of clearly awesome older women

I have no idea what happened between my brain and fingers there. Should have read "What they are though is a bunch of clearly awesome older women" . . .

Pretty sure my face is going to get less and less feminine as I age: nose will spread even more, color will slowly drain out of my cheeks and lips (high contrast faces are considered more feminine apparently! true according to science), chin has gotten less chinny (and wasn't a paragon of its kind to begin with), skin doesn't have that glow. I'm going to have to settle for being a person instead of being a feminine person. I know I might not seem like the likeliest candidate to be bothered by that, but I am. When I see my face without make-up now, I feel like it belongs to someone plain and sexless.

xp :) I don't know if my illusions are waving or drowning, but they're definitely getting farther away.

it's funny, though, to my twenty-something self, "becoming a person" instead of a woman seemed like one of the alluring things about being an old lady. but i know what you mean, Laurel.

I know! I'm not sorry about the destination, I'm just not feeling ready for the sacrifices of the trip just yet.

E, I thought the group photo was cool! Those wimmenz are STYLISH as HELL and at least some of them seem to have re-defined their guiding principle from "attractive by a strict measure" to "awesome by any measure that counts." That's the general idea, I think?!

Yeah, exactly.

I want to see Laurel's withering gaze.

x-post - Front right is my fav btw. I don't know who she is but I freaking love everything about her look from the hair to the glasses and necklaces. She's gonna be my old woman style icon.

i wouldn't mind turning out like

http://img2.timeinc.net/ew/dynamic/imgs/090824/rosemarys-baby-gordon_l.jpg

but obvs there's gonna be some steps involved

E, I don't know what year that pic was taken, but I saw someone's personal wardrobe put on exhibit at the Met's Costume Institute after she died, and based on the pic it could have been that lady's. Obviously she was someone of enough privilege to travel the world collecting jewelry, silks, and weird tribal artifacts from flea markets and nomadic bazaars, but still...a lifetime of following one's muse, on phenomenal display.

Yeah idk Laurel - I just found it online a while ago and had saved it cause I thought they were sort of inspirational. That exhibit sounds amazing.

Oh dear lord, it was Iris Apfel's collection. GIS her and you'll see what I mean.

I know this is the kind of complaint that gets people slapped, buuuut...although I'm obvs glad that genetics have been kind to me in allowing me to retain a somewhat youthful visage, I'm getting to an age where I think it's almost more of a hindrance in a lot of ways. Like, people don't generally assume that I'm in my mid-30s (the fact that I'm a pretty little dude also plays a role there, I'm sure), so I tend to get treated as if I were a kid a lot of the time. Not that my general demeanor does much to disabuse them of that notion. But still. I wouldn't mind some outward sign of my years of hardship already. I'm legit about to start buying rumpled old suits and dressing like Burroughs until the rest of me catches up.

Um... Oh, I'm also bald! Totally rockin' the toilet seat hair. That's pretty gross, right? Eww! I can own that.

Also apparently she wasn't dead at the time! Boy did I misunderstand that. She just allowed her stuff to be shown.

Oh man - I LOVE HER.

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_NftlVPmu2gw/S7CQZwpPrVI/AAAAAAAAOZ8/61DObcgVnKk/s1600/Iris+Apfel+in+a+recent+issue+of+O+magazine.pngp

That lady is beautiful

u + k blog:
http://advancedstyle.blogspot.com/

!!!

Deric, I'm 40 and I still get treated like I was a kid. It doesn't get any better with age.

I remember silently rolling my eyes at Amateurist during this thread's original incarnation. Sorry Amst!

this is my favorite captain beefheart song I think

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G2wtHYyERls

I think I have the opposite of this problem btw so I'll stop posting

are you getting hotter and hotter? that is a serious problem.

portrait of dorian gray shit

I think my body just grew into itself tbh

http://unidentifiedflyingpeaches.files.wordpress.com/2010/07/pekar-small.jpg

Oh god, where did I leave my collagen last night?

Is it possible to be ugly and not spend your every waking hour obsessing how much you hate the way you look? Would like to hear from anyone who has managed to pull this off.

This revive brought to you by contemplating the 'what celebrity do you look like' thread and not being bale to think of any plausible candidates who don't make me want to never leave the house again.

Yeah, the modicum of dignity that I'm holding onto right now is a product of a very strained imagination.

Is it possible to be ugly and not spend your every waking hour obsessing how much you hate the way you look? Would like to hear from anyone who has managed to pull this off.

― that is how ghosts laugh (bends)

well i look a lot like the guy in that cartoon (thanks for that) but i do find that being fuckin awesome in most other ways gets me through the day quite nicely tbh

The sooner I can ditch these looks, the sooner I can start developing an even remotely engaging personality.

"i do find that being fuckin awesome in most other ways gets me through the day quite nicely tbh"

yeah, I think this is where I'm going wrong.

I'm wondering if I'm ever going to have that slightly reddened, slightly grizzled facial skin some people seem to get between the soft period and the wrinkled period

ugly applies to attitudes, not looks.

it's brutal being yr own worst critic, true - i think you shd consider the real possibility that nobody else looks at your face the same way you do, or sees it that way either.

it's best not to even think about this stuff. i do though, "god i'm an ugly cunt" is usually the phrase in my mind. hopefully i don't actually believe it.

nv otm tho, best to ignore these voices.

LOL at me @ 25yo

it's only been downhill this past decade

Is it possible to be ugly and not spend your every waking hour obsessing how much you hate the way you look? Would like to hear from anyone who has managed to pull this off.

idk so long as i'm not faced with a mirror or a photograph it's pretty easy to let something else occupy the forefront of my mind, admittedly this does mean that seeing my face is always something of a shock

i've lost so much hair that my face is going bald

is there a nutritional supplement to help reduce puffy face syndrome

xxp i'm always (unpleasantly) surprised at how i look in photos in the same way one's voice seems weird when heard it on a recording.

gr8080 lay off all booze, dairy, corn, soy and drink more water. My old supervisor researched and saw "experts" and was told this. After several months on a new diet, there were noticeable improvements.

oh my god, i am struggling with my looks. lost 37 pounds over the last two years so i'm now only like ten pounds overweight, but i can't lose weight in my face and neck without quitting smoking cigarettes...the weirdest thing--i must be the only person for whom smoking makes bloat up. cannot bear to use a current picture on dating sites until i don't look like a jowly walrus above the chest. my build is actually pretty good but i've never met anyone who takes worse pictures. my face is like a big mushy pile of custard...

something about september/summer turning to autumn that sends my jowl growth in to overdrive

Did you wake up this morning,
Look at yourself in the mirror and say
Ah, gr9080, this ain't me?

I caught a reflection of the bags under my eyes in the LRT this morning that made me wonder if I'd been awake for 2 weeks solid.

FaceTime has been real bad for my facial self esteem

Is anyone else actually getting better looking as they age?

fuck yeah, it's awesome

ikr

I think I'm getting better looking as I age. Mostly by being extremely sedentary/unfit in my 20s, I set the bar really low as far as looks go. I'm certainly getting gray/wrinkles and years of sun exposure are showing up, but I think in general I'm feeling good. Confidence and being in relatively good health help that a lot.

you be the judge!

20: https://scontent-iad3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/1933762_508311389587_8732_n.jpg?oh=a2e111e40fc75fc6ab02eae08dd79c30&oe=57F372EE

30: https://scontent-iad3-1.xx.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/13221674_10100474923907327_7428257024563892851_n.jpg?oh=d2039cf5f5468aec1cb64b99edf6dbea&oe=5806DACF

high-five!

those photos are a good basis for comparison as you are making the exact same expression in both. also, photo 1 should be made into a dealwithit.gif

It's awesome how as I get further away from the metabolic damage done by a couple years on Risperdal as a teenager- why, sure, it's FANTASTIC for social phobia!- and find better information about how to take care of myself (because I live alone and rarely hang out with anyone more than once a month) all the positive effects are essentially undone by the effects of aging so I work myself to the fucking bone but still look like an unfuckable human potato

Also I am super fucking hammered if that was not obvious.

PROTIP for hanging out with an ex and discussing how amazingly their new relationship is: DO NOT THIS

I feel like I'm at least breaking even as I age and possibly getting better looking on account of not really having has any concept of fitness until at least my early twenties and then very gradually getting better and more serious about working out. I had a few years of decline after the kids were born, but around last August I reintroduced a pretty fierce gym habit and also started seriously lifting for the first time in my life, which I feel like has made me look stronger and more manly than I used to and given me more presence.

kind of a wash for me -- I am more comfortable in my skin, but less comfortable in my clothes, perhaps because perpetual ongoing low-grade student poverty means that the only new additions to my wardrobe in the last ~5 years have been gifts from mom. I like to imagine that I will eventually look quite dashing in a suit, though!

Got into- not an argument, but a discussion w/ ex trying to explain to her I was taking a short break from OKCupid, Tinder, etc while I worked on losing weight- doing a 12-week calorie cut to try and drop 15-ish pounds, at least. How am I suppsoed to react to being told it doesn't matter, people will like you whatever, etc when seriously I have been somewhere between slight to worryingly overweight ever since I got started on antidepressants when I was about 12? It's basically impossible to explain to people who were attractive in their teens/20s/etc, but basically I hate my body as it is now and as it has ever been and I want to burn that shit to the fucking ground. Why is it vanity or cowardice to want to take some time out and work on myself so I can not have fucking tits at least once before Im' 40?

In a few years I am certain that people will be remarking at how dapper and handsome I look as I lie in my coffin.

The mourners, of course will be lying rather more pleasantly (see what I did there?).