Man jailed for rape wins £7m lottery while on weekend release

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http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/3554008.stm

I think the issues most of interest/worthy of discussion are:

Is Michael Howard right in that prisoners should not be allowed to play the Lottery if they can't do the football pools and other things? I think yes

Should the winner now be made to at least pay compensation to his victims?

― the neurotic awakening of s (blueski), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 13:27 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.newcomicreviews.com/temp/spidey/spidey14.jpg

― Red Panda Sanskrit (ex machina), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 13:28 (twenty-one years ago)

I don't think he should have been able to do it in the first place. However, I don't think he should be made to pay compensation, as his sentence has already been passed as such. He did a terrible thing, for which he is being punished, but I don't think that's right. I would be interested to know the victims views of this though.

― PinXor (Pinkpanther), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 13:29 (twenty-one years ago)

Yes Howard is right. While on weekend release you shouldn't be able to gamble, full stop, and probably not drink either, at least in public. I guess this guy ought to pay compensation, but how do you then run that parallell to future earnings in other remuneration cases?

― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 13:29 (twenty-one years ago)

Hoare, originally from Leeds, is nearing the end of his life sentence after being jailed in 1989 for attempted rape.

funniest sentence ever.

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 13:30 (twenty-one years ago)

On weekend release you should be able to do anything legal that doesn't violate the terms of the release. And Pink's right - he's been sentenced for his crime. Would the victim agree to five years off his sentence in return for a million quid? It's a pretty horrible deal to propose.

― Markelby (Mark C), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 13:31 (twenty-one years ago)

oh come on, he's done his time.

1989!!!

― Red Panda Sanskrit (ex machina), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 13:31 (twenty-one years ago)

i have a friend called j0 h0are - we call her j-ho.

― dog latin (dog latin), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 13:31 (twenty-one years ago)

Well there is at least one person on ILE who thinks the guy should probably have been killed for his crimes, so the fact he's now £7m richer and still not dead must be quite teh suck.

I'm not sure about compensating victims - my knees jerk in a nodding fashion tho...

― the neurotic awakening of s (blueski), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 13:31 (twenty-one years ago)

wtf is "weekend release" anyway? Surely there are things yr not allowed to do, like violating parole or something?

― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 13:32 (twenty-one years ago)

i'm not sure where i got the 'weekend' release from, apologies

― the neurotic awakening of s (blueski), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 13:33 (twenty-one years ago)

He wouldn't have been made to compensate the victims if he'd been worth £7m at the time he was convicted, would he? Would they be able to sue him now?

― Madchen (Madchen), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 13:35 (twenty-one years ago)

on that page on top right .. the video bit..
The BBC's Luisa Baldini
"Hoare was on weekend leave... when his numbers came up"

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 13:35 (twenty-one years ago)

right Lucy, it's not fair, but then neither is what happened before. but of course two wrongs be not making right and all that, tho often I can't help thinking why the fuck not...

― the neurotic awakening of s (blueski), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 13:37 (twenty-one years ago)

Can she not sue him for emotional distress? That's a separate case from the rape/criminal trial.

― dave225 (Dave225), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 13:38 (twenty-one years ago)

Well there is at least one person on ILE who thinks the guy should probably have been killed for his crimes, so the fact he's now £7m richer and still not dead must be quite teh suck.
Of course steve, but the point is, the legal system as it stands means that he has already served (well is serving at least) his time.

― PinXor (Pinkpanther), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 13:40 (twenty-one years ago)

Mr Owen, who has rarely seen his brother in 20 years, said he was sorry that Hoare's victims would have to suffer his crimes being "raked up again".

He said: "One of the victims was 60 and she must be in her 80s now if she's still alive. "It must be hard for her having to read all this again. What my brother did was inexcusable."

Quite confused as to how violent criminals are allowed "weekend release" and in the article where it states that he is close to the "end of his life sentence"

I kind of disagree with his brother on the idea that "hopefully the money will keep him on the straight and narrow" as the man has obviously shown he has a bit of an issue with recidivism.

I dunno, he raped a 60 year old woman, I'd shoot him.

― TOMBOT, Wednesday, 11 August 2004 13:42 (twenty-one years ago)

during his weekend release he even made it to EasyEverything to start the C/D The "Cuteness" Of Old People thread

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 14:08 (twenty-one years ago)

i don't get why instead of saying 'life sentence' the law/meejah don't just say
'he was sentenced to about 20-25 yrs, which will be reduced to about 12-15 if he agrees to behave in an orderly fashion and not make life difficult for the prison officers'

the closest thing we have to 'life sentence' is actually that odd phrase 'detained at her majesty's pleasure'

it seems a strange feature of the prison system that they effectively *have* to hold out the promise of early release otherwise they can't control the behaviour of the inmates - seems a bit like being blackmailed/threatened

― Snowy Mann (rdmanston), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 14:29 (twenty-one years ago)

TOMBOT - you've eaten kangaroo, so I'd far rather shoot you. How do you judge cruelty?

― C-Man (C-Man), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 14:32 (twenty-one years ago)

There was a new 'kangaroos becoming more a social nuisance' story on the news the other day. I am deeply opposed to kangaroos winning the Lottery I might add.

― the neurotic awakening of s (blueski), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 14:35 (twenty-one years ago)

In fact wasn't there a movie about that? It won the lottery and then kicked the shit out of anyone it ran into? Dangerous animals, shouldn't be allowed.

― the neurotic awakening of s (blueski), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 14:37 (twenty-one years ago)

Would they get a bouncing cheque?

― Madchen (Madchen), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 14:37 (twenty-one years ago)

that'd sure burn a hole in their pocket.

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 14:42 (twenty-one years ago)

First one to mention kangaroo court gets a slap

Can I at this point apologise for all the obvious gags I've attempted to make lately?

― Penelope_111 (Penelope_111), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 14:45 (twenty-one years ago)

Hahaha!

TS: eating meat vs raping people

(and I'm done)

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 14:45 (twenty-one years ago)

He was first jailed for a sexual assualt/rape for 3 years in the 70's.

Within that 3 years he was released early and raped someone else.

He was later jailed for 4 years for another sexual assualt/rape.

Within that 4 years he was released early and raped someone else.

He was jailed for life.

Within that life sentence he was released early and won 7 million quid

― Bidfurd, Wednesday, 11 August 2004 14:51 (twenty-one years ago)

Yay God!

― na (Nick A.), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 14:54 (twenty-one years ago)

hey its not my fault if you lot can't get your bloody justice system sorted out
i gave you the old testament already innit

― God (rdmanston), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 15:28 (twenty-one years ago)

you could have put something in there about eating kangaroos God!

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 15:30 (twenty-one years ago)

at least!

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 15:31 (twenty-one years ago)

Can we ban Calum please after that desperately offensive comment? Please? Otherwise I'm going to kill the sick cunt.

― Markelby (Mark C), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 15:36 (twenty-one years ago)

how is that C-MAN comment offensive?

― Red Panda Sanskrit (ex machina), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 15:38 (twenty-one years ago)

why do you keep asking that question when you already know the answer?

― the neurotic awakening of s (blueski), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 15:39 (twenty-one years ago)

x-post

― the neurotic awakening of s (blueski), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 15:39 (twenty-one years ago)

― RJG (RJG), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 15:40 (twenty-one years ago)

you overreacted slightly on that post, mark, i'd rather ban you.

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 15:45 (twenty-one years ago)

ken c, otm

― Red Panda Sanskrit (ex machina), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 15:46 (twenty-one years ago)

Okay, ban us both.

― Markelby (Mark C), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 15:48 (twenty-one years ago)

but why ban anyone when we can just ridicule? :)

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 15:57 (twenty-one years ago)

kangaroos haha (cough) er i'd mebbe had a few when i populated the antipodes...
i TOLD noah not to include them on that bloody big boat - but he was all like 'ooh but the missus likes them'

and then MY missus found out and wouldn't let me launch the holy torpedo grrrrr

― God (rdmanston), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 15:58 (twenty-one years ago)

ahem i may want to rephrase that

― God (rdmanston), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 15:58 (twenty-one years ago)

when you cook kangaroos do you put the cooked baby kangaroo inside the pocket?

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 15:59 (twenty-one years ago)

or is that slot for the mashed potatoes?

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 15:59 (twenty-one years ago)

Damn straight ban the moron.

The guy's a rapist and, yes, he should - ideally - not be 7m better off, but there's a ton of sleazy fuckers in music and movies that are worth umpteen times more than that (the late Don Simpson? Axl Rose? Snoop Dogg? Chuck Berry? You guys gonna not buy their albums now?).

So, really, unless you wanna change society then this thread is dud.

And, finally, when you look at the well publicised cruelty involved in killing kangaroos (how they are kept etc), the fact that they are group animals, wild creatures, caring parents and - above all else - intelligent and cool as fuck, I'd say that eating one makes Tombot suitable for a fairly medium sized kicking.

― C-Man (C-Man), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 15:59 (twenty-one years ago)

Oops, I meant James Brown not Chuck Berry.

Sorry.

― C-Man (C-Man), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 16:00 (twenty-one years ago)

just because Tombot doesn't get as much press as the kangaroos it doens't mean he should be hurt.

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 16:01 (twenty-one years ago)

What about the elephants?

― Leon Czolgosz (Nicole), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 16:02 (twenty-one years ago)

Br3tt @nd3rs0n had KIDS on his rider.

― Jimmybommy JimmyK'KANG (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 16:03 (twenty-one years ago)

Dude, whatever you're getting at is surely not helped by the fact that I actually have never eaten kangaroo meat and said so on the thread in question, where I did in fact admit to having eaten dog. This gross misrepresentation is really what's bothering me more than anything else.

― TOMBOT, Wednesday, 11 August 2004 16:03 (twenty-one years ago)

are they intelligent and cool as fuck? if not go for it.

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 16:03 (twenty-one years ago)

I THINK ROMAN POLANSKI SHOULD HAVE HIS ASSETS FROZEN

― Red Panda Sanskrit (ex machina), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 16:03 (twenty-one years ago)

xpost re: the elephant obv.

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 16:04 (twenty-one years ago)

Eating dog is reprehensible. Haven't you looked into any of this? People actively boycott places like South Korea for what they do to dogs. And I've seen footage of the animals being killed and they slowy strangle them to death because the sadistic cunts believe that this makes the meat more tender. By eating dog YOU SUPPORTED THIS. My pet cat means more to me than YOU buddy and I'd imagine a pet dog would mean more to me than YOU so by supporting the cruelty and killing of dogs YOU should be arrested and locked up for a long time. GUILTY OF SADISM. LOCK THE FUCKER AWAY.

Yes it does. And the uninformed idiots who ate shark and whale meat should be kicked in the head very hard as well.

Sharks = going extinct because of "finning". Supporting shark meat = supporting the extinction of the creatures.

That means no more sharks for future generations to watch.

That means, to me, selfish people. And by depriving the future generations from seeing these creatures I think you could make a fair arguement for those who have consumed shark meat to be fed to hungry sharks in order to re-address the balance.

― C-Man (C-Man), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 16:05 (twenty-one years ago)

(Are sharks really endangered?)

Japan's whaling = insane

― Red Panda Sanskrit (ex machina), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 16:07 (twenty-one years ago)

That means no more sharks for future generations to watch.

cos that's all they're good for isn't it.

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 16:08 (twenty-one years ago)

I can't believe "Earth Song" has been forgotten already:

http://www.neverland-valley.com/neverland-valley/video-clips/videos/08_history/earth-song/pix/earth-song_052.jpg

― Leon Czolgosz (Nicole), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 16:08 (twenty-one years ago)

BY BUYING SUEDE RECORDS YOU SOPPORTED CHILD ABUSE AND THE DRUG INDUSTRY YOU DENSE FUCK. ALSO SONY MAKE TANKS. IT GOES ON AND ON. PLUS TOMBOT COULD SO FUCKIGN KICK YR ASS AND THEN EAT YOU.

― Jimmybommy JimmyK'KANG (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 16:09 (twenty-one years ago)

Survival of the fittest. If sharks and flamingos can't stop us eating them then they deserve to go extinct innit.

― Jimmybommy JimmyK'KANG (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 16:10 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.neverland-valley.com/neverland-valley/video-clips/videos/08_history/earth-song/pix/earth-song_008.jpg

He looks like Michael Landon in this picture.

― Leon Czolgosz (Nicole), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 16:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Eating dog is reprehensible. Haven't you looked into any of this?

I am in tears.

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 16:11 (twenty-one years ago)

cman is a hypocrite who says he thinks eating dogs is cruel, but secretly (or not so secretly) wants to eat out avril lavigne.

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 16:11 (twenty-one years ago)

THINK OF THE BEARDED CLAM

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 16:12 (twenty-one years ago)

My Turn: 'Save the Elephants—Don't Buy Ivory Soap'
Burdening kids with issues they can't understand creates confusion, not future environmentalists

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/5634887/site/newsweek/

When I think back to my own childhood, I wonder how my friends and I would have reacted to cereal-box messages like FIND A CURE FOR POLIO or STOP THE VIETNAM WAR.

...

My kids, ages 9 and 5, don't know the meaning of the word "endangered."

WTF

― Red Panda Sanskrit (ex machina), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 16:12 (twenty-one years ago)

LISTENING TO ARAB ON RADAR MAKES THE DRUG MULE PROBLEM WORSE

― Red Panda Sanskrit (ex machina), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 16:12 (twenty-one years ago)

hahahahaha

― Jimmybommy JimmyK'KANG (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 16:13 (twenty-one years ago)

Doesn't surprise none of you morons have even looked into this.

― C-Man (C-Man), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 16:25 (twenty-one years ago)

I don't eat Dog

― Red Panda Sanskrit (ex machina), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 16:27 (twenty-one years ago)

In the C-Man vs. Dave Q, unintentional vs. intentional hilarity stakes today, I fear C-Man runs a poor and somewhat corroded second.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 16:37 (twenty-one years ago)

PS: Calum might want to follow his own advice re: looking into things.

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 16:47 (twenty-one years ago)

ally c has just told me that he was originally captured after he had escaped to jersey and the police didn't know where he was UNTIL HE APPLIED TO BE A CONTESTANT ON JIMMY TARBUCK'S "WINNER TAKES ALL".

http://www.ukgameshows.com/atoz/programmes/w/winner_takes_all/winnertakesall_logo.jpg http://www.ukgameshows.com/atoz/programmes/w/winner_takes_all/winnertakesall_1.jpg http://www.ukgameshows.com/atoz/programmes/w/winner_takes_all/winnertakesall_2.jpg

― RJG (RJG), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 16:52 (twenty-one years ago)

Yo. I Googled Andrea Dworkin and that was one of the first things that came up. Point stands: Dworkin is a nut with a big fat belly who is envious of those of use who like pretty slim girls.

Point also stands: Perry is a tosspot who defends the cruel strangulation and consumption of (often stolen) dogs.

P.S. Ned - you fat fecker, you found your woman on Friendster yet? LOL. Betcha have to do internet dating too, poor guy.

― C-Man (C-Man), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 16:54 (twenty-one years ago)

I'd rather advocate cruel strangulation of stolen dogs than be a Nati0na1 Fr0nt racist who hates Koreans.

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 17:03 (twenty-one years ago)

I think you're kicking uphill a bit here, calum.

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 17:04 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh yeah, of course I hate Koreans you twat. And there isn't a movement against this *illegal* practice in Korea.

And, of course, criticising ANY culture = racism you small minded moron. Yeah, I hate bullfighting therefore I HATE the Spanish. smart guy. Morrissey's recent talk about a boycott on Thailand until it learns how to treat its elephants properly means he hates the PEOPLE OF THAILAND.

AND THESE CHINESE PEOPLE WHO PROTEST IN EDINBURGH ASKING FOR A TOURIST BOYCOTT ON CHINA UNTIL THEIR HUMAN RIGHTS RECORD COMES UP TO SCRATCH = NATIONAL FRONT LOONIES!!!

Dan Perry, you have shit for brains.

― C-Man (C-Man), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 17:24 (twenty-one years ago)

For what it's worth I actually made up the part about having eaten dog. I just threw that in there as a joke because I've eaten so many korean pork dishes. Pork.

See? It's funny.

― TOMBOT, Wednesday, 11 August 2004 17:33 (twenty-one years ago)

I would probably eat a rapist, but only if they let me personally toss him in the boiling water.

― TOMBOT, Wednesday, 11 August 2004 17:37 (twenty-one years ago)

But what will our children look at, Tom?

― dean? (deangulberry), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 17:39 (twenty-one years ago)

Bukkake.

― TOMBOT, Wednesday, 11 August 2004 17:40 (twenty-one years ago)

Is C-man a vegetarian?

― oops (Oops), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 17:41 (twenty-one years ago)

c-man has just made me really wanting to eat a dog right now.

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 17:48 (twenty-one years ago)

I am seriously in hysterics here.

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 18:03 (twenty-one years ago)

I quite fancy eating a dog now too. Should we look into this?

― Jimmybommy JimmyK'KANG (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 19:15 (twenty-one years ago)

fancy a dog?

― ken c (ken c), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 19:18 (twenty-one years ago)

Hey, Calum.

I have eaten CAT before. Inadvertantly but it is true. I have also eaten: shark, along with all variety of normal-in-American-society meats. Including buffalo and ostrich?

What you think about that, you simpering little bizarro spawn of Chris Klein and Tim Roth?

I hope a kangaroo rapes you, honestly. I have never said such a thing before. Possibly because it makes no sense.

― Allyzay Science Explosion (allyzay), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 19:25 (twenty-one years ago)

My cat, Ally, is so much more worthy of life than you.

― C-Man (C-Man), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 19:31 (twenty-one years ago)

C-MAN = CAT-MAN?

― dean? (deangulberry), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 19:35 (twenty-one years ago)

dude that is so gay.

― Allyzay Science Explosion (allyzay), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 19:39 (twenty-one years ago)

dude looks like a bad cross between Chris Klein and Tim Roth and OWNS A CAT, seriously you don't actually have a gf, will you admit this finally?

― Allyzay Science Explosion (allyzay), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 19:39 (twenty-one years ago)

He has a cat.

― Jimmybommy JimmyK'KANG (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 19:40 (twenty-one years ago)

it used to be a pussy.

― Jimmybommy JimmyK'KANG (Nick Southall), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 19:40 (twenty-one years ago)

ARE YOU ALL DEAF????---------JIMMY TARBUCK'S "WINNER TAKES ALL"

― RJG (RJG), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 19:42 (twenty-one years ago)

C-MAN - RAISED BY ~~WOLVES~~ POULTRY

― Markelby (Mark C), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 19:43 (twenty-one years ago)

IORWORTH HOARE'S WEINER TAKES ALL

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Wednesday, 11 August 2004 21:07 (twenty-one years ago)

this thread got...something...while i was away

― the neurotic awakening of s (blueski), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 21:18 (twenty-one years ago)

Hahaha!

TS: leaving drawing pins on people's seats vs. sending emails whose subject is "re: B&Q"

― Eyeball Kicks (Eyeball Kicks), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 21:25 (twenty-one years ago)

My pet cat means more to me than YOU buddy and I'd imagine a pet dog would mean more to me than YOU so by supporting the cruelty and killing of dogs YOU should be arrested and locked up for a long time. GUILTY OF SADISM. LOCK THE FUCKER AWAY.

None of this is surprising of course but I'd like to know what the C-man thinks of cats', especially housecats' untrained at hunting, sadism toward their occasional victims. Should they too be punished?

― Michael White (Hereward), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 21:38 (twenty-one years ago)

They should be made to write lines.

― Eyeball Kicks (Eyeball Kicks), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 21:43 (twenty-one years ago)

They should be made *do* lines off a suitably pampered, thoroughbred pussy.

― Penelope_111 (Penelope_111), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 21:52 (twenty-one years ago)

Cats that callously catch and eat mice should be isolated and studied at length to see what nutrient we can extract from them for our personal use.

― the neurotic awakening of s (blueski), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 21:53 (twenty-one years ago)

http://bonsaikitten.chaos.org/squishGray.jpg

― mookieproof (mookieproof), Wednesday, 11 August 2004 22:00 (twenty-one years ago)

now that i haev seen open water the movie i realy think that all sharks should be stung to death by wasps. or submariens disguised as wasps. or submarins that bear litle resemblance to wasps but are equiped with shark-stingging aparatuses. because sharks, lets face it, suck.

― :|, Wednesday, 11 August 2004 23:57 (twenty-one years ago)

YOU CUNTS MUST BE FUCKING DEAF CUNTS

― RJG (RJG), Thursday, 12 August 2004 00:07 (twenty-one years ago)

well good fucking morning to you too

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Thursday, 12 August 2004 00:08 (twenty-one years ago)

oh, yeah, sorry; you noticed but you don't know about it.

: (

― RJG (RJG), Thursday, 12 August 2004 00:11 (twenty-one years ago)

It was a great anecdote RJG, what happened next? Did Ally win?

― the neurotic awakening of s (blueski), Thursday, 12 August 2004 00:23 (twenty-one years ago)

the soundtrack to this thread is the Hallelujah chorus of Handel's Messiah

― gabbneb (gabbneb), Thursday, 12 August 2004 00:28 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.base58.com/ilx/chickenreason.jpg

― the neurotic awakening of s (blueski), Thursday, 12 August 2004 00:46 (twenty-one years ago)

stevem, am I right in thinking that, perhaps, you think that, when ally told me about jimmy tarbuck's "winner takes all", he was making a joke?

― RJG (RJG), Thursday, 12 August 2004 01:06 (twenty-one years ago)

wait, i need to know why he was captured in the first place. and why Jersey.

― the neurotic awakening of s (blueski), Thursday, 12 August 2004 01:08 (twenty-one years ago)

HE WAS CAPTURED BECAUSE HE APPLIED TO APPEAR, AS A CONTESTANT, ON JIMMY TARBUCK'S "WINNER TAKES ALL".

― RJG (RJG), Thursday, 12 August 2004 01:10 (twenty-one years ago)

I DON'T KNOW WHY JERSEY.

― RJG (RJG), Thursday, 12 August 2004 01:10 (twenty-one years ago)

what was he escaping from?

― the neurotic awakening of s (blueski), Thursday, 12 August 2004 01:12 (twenty-one years ago)

what do kangaroos have to do with this?

― purple patch (electricsound), Thursday, 12 August 2004 01:16 (twenty-one years ago)

i have personally eaten a piece of the original skippy

― purple patch (electricsound), Thursday, 12 August 2004 01:17 (twenty-one years ago)

STEVEM, HE IS A RAPIST.

― RJG (RJG), Thursday, 12 August 2004 01:53 (twenty-one years ago)

Hahaha C-Man in no idea how Australians raise, prepare and sell the meat we eat ALL THE FUCKING TIME shockah.

('roos are pests here. Unless youre a vegan, I'd suggest you shoosh up about what animals are right to eat and what are not.

We eat shark for our fish and chips too, you know).

Yeah yeah DNFT etc etc bollox blah.

― Trayce (trayce), Thursday, 12 August 2004 05:29 (twenty-one years ago)

i ate croc once too. i'm yet to sample a koala taco though

― purple patch (electricsound), Thursday, 12 August 2004 05:49 (twenty-one years ago)

C-man is one of those people who find animals much friendlier than humans, to wit:

Animals do not answer back
Animals are not cockblocking his entrée into the glittering media career he so richly deserves, purely because they can and they'd like to make Calz paranoid, oh no...
Animals do not give you the phone number 770 5519 ('piss off', backwards) after a night buying them drinks and whatnot
Animals can't write circles around him
Animals might just hump his leg.

Animals. Underrated?

― suzy (suzy), Thursday, 12 August 2004 06:08 (twenty-one years ago)

you're an animal.

― RJG (RJG), Thursday, 12 August 2004 06:11 (twenty-one years ago)

It struck me yesterday that Calum is a big Libertines fan AND hates London. I don't understand.

― Jimmybommy JimmyK'KANG (Nick Southall), Thursday, 12 August 2004 06:12 (twenty-one years ago)

Kangaroo
by Yuz Aleshkovsky

Translated from the Russian by Tamara Glenny

Russian Literature Series
Fiction
March 1999
290 pages, 5.5 x 8.5
$13.50, paperback, 1-56478-216-6

One morning in 1949, Fan Fanych, alias Etcetera, is summoned from his Moscow apartment to KGB headquarters, where he is informed that he will be charged with a crime more heinous than any mere man could ever devise. Comrade Etcetera will be tried for "the vicious rape and murder of an aged kangaroo in the Moscow Zoo on a night between July 14, 1789, and January 9, 1905."

― |a|m|t|r|s|t| (amateurist), Thursday, 12 August 2004 06:15 (twenty-one years ago)

And in answer to the thread topic the convicted rapist, as much as we deplore him for the crime, really shouldn't be swindled out of the money he won quite lawfully. It may well be the only lawful thing he's ever done. Close the rather embarrassing loophole and collect (huge) tax on the £7 mil and end the matter there.

I hate these shrill voices on the telly that bay for vengeance when they just want to get paws on money. At this point, hand out, one sort of becomes a professional victim and I think that's what bothers me most about the thrust and tone of campaigns in the fold-once-only papers. Yes, these people have every right to their anger but their avarice and rationalisations for their own greed astound me. As the victim of a violent crime it would be quite easy to think that you had a claim on this man's possessions for the rest of your life and in addition to the 7 mil you should probably also have any spare organs and an open-ended plan to siphon off all his prison wages evermore, because that's retribution in some people's minds.

(oh and erm SickMo, I know Br3++, careful, how did the 'bring on the nine-year-old!' story turn into 'kids on the rider'?)

― suzy (suzy), Thursday, 12 August 2004 06:35 (twenty-one years ago)

[I just say it to wind up Calum - hence I always google-proof Br3tt's name...]

― Jimmybommy JimmyK'KANG (Nick Southall), Thursday, 12 August 2004 06:39 (twenty-one years ago)

It's 2am in Los Angeles - I'm really craving a buffalo or ostrich burger

― Elvis Telecom (Chris Barrus), Thursday, 12 August 2004 07:45 (twenty-one years ago)

If you can get a buffalo+ostrich double cheeseburger anywhere in the world at 2am, it HAS to be LA.

― Jimmybommy JimmyK'KANG (Nick Southall), Thursday, 12 August 2004 07:46 (twenty-one years ago)

I'd be well up for buffalo - what's the difference between it and cow?

― Markelby (Mark C), Thursday, 12 August 2004 08:19 (twenty-one years ago)

What the fukc is the difference between it and ANYTHING, when it comes down to it? It's ok to slaughter and kill cows, but if yuo do the same to dogs then you = evil? WTF????? That doesn't make any sense whatsoever!!

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Thursday, 12 August 2004 08:20 (twenty-one years ago)

Norman, are you trying to *argue* with Calum? I find just throwing vicious insults is ultimately more satisfying.

Incidentally, Calum = Stu on BB with his "I'm clever, me" rants despite massive and incontrovertible evidence to the contrary?

― Markelby (Mark C), Thursday, 12 August 2004 08:23 (twenty-one years ago)

I'd say it's most evil to be completely racist about certain Asian countries because they do not have the same attitude to our pets as we do.

(xpost to Mark) The difference between cow 'mozzarella' and mozzarella di bufala, that's what.

― suzy (suzy), Thursday, 12 August 2004 08:23 (twenty-one years ago)

That's such a massive slur on Macclesfield's answer to Bill and Ted.

― suzy (suzy), Thursday, 12 August 2004 08:24 (twenty-one years ago)

If you can get a buffalo+ostrich double cheeseburger anywhere in the world at 2am, it HAS to be LA.

I drawing a blank on buffalo in LA. I know where you can get buffalo burgers 24hrs in SF.

Actually, I think Swingers on Beverly Bl has ostrich burgers.

― Elvis Telecom (Chris Barrus), Thursday, 12 August 2004 08:27 (twenty-one years ago)

That's such a massive slur on Macclesfield's answer to Bill and Ted.

The Chuckle Brothers?!

― the neurotic awakening of s (blueski), Thursday, 12 August 2004 08:28 (twenty-one years ago)

i think mark meant the taste.

― ken c (ken c), Thursday, 12 August 2004 08:30 (twenty-one years ago)

It's 2am in Los Angeles - I'm really craving a buffalo or ostrich burger

Damn you sir, it may be 6:15 am now but you've got me thinking the same thing! Argh!

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 12 August 2004 11:56 (twenty-one years ago)

MURDERER OF ANIMALS!! COWARD WHO NEVER MET ME!! ARGH!! AHR#GH!!

― C-MANg (Pashmina), Thursday, 12 August 2004 12:06 (twenty-one years ago)

(+wtf are you doing up at 6.15!!)

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Thursday, 12 August 2004 12:07 (twenty-one years ago)

Dear Calum,

I hope this lil note finds you well.

As someone who was was a vegeterian for years I can understand certain issues you feel strongly about.

I've followed your posts with interests and I feel that your arguments can only lead me to one position. I will be having an animal slaughtered to hold a barbecue in in your honour.

I will be posting pictures from the process to illustrate this and will save the hide for a jacket for you or anyone from ILX who wishes. (again in your honour)

I hope you appreciate what your arguments have been able to accomplish.

peace, love & coffee

-h-

― H (Heruy), Friday, 13 August 2004 01:12 (twenty-one years ago)

Astounding!

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 13 August 2004 01:16 (twenty-one years ago)

Make sure you put makeup in its eyes first, H; it really enhances the flavor.

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 13 August 2004 01:16 (twenty-one years ago)

& baste with barbeque sauce inserted in piping-hot suppositories while the animal's still alive: keeps the tripe fresher.

― x j e r e m y (x Jeremy), Friday, 13 August 2004 03:10 (twenty-one years ago)

Hmmm. Look at the second post, the cartoon strip. What does it say tn the third panel?

"BRILLIANT, MARY JANE! I INTEND TO PAY FOR YOUR IDEA IN RAPE DOLLARS."

All those "People who are dicks" threads, who were they posted by?
Mary Jane Watson.

Coeincidence?

;- )

― Masked Gazza, Friday, 13 August 2004 03:20 (twenty-one years ago)

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