Your Food, Your Fork, Your Knife: A Poll

Cut food into bites before eating, then eat bites

wuuuut

option 2 is what sane grown people do.

yeah, I haven't been five years old in a long long time

Option 2 is the best argument ever for the European method of holding silverware: fork kept, tines down, in left hand, knife kept in right throughout the meal.

I'm a big fan of Option 1, though, for putting all the exertion into short bursts and allowing you to eat for a while without having to have both hands busy or be focused on your plate. Also I am 6 years old.

xp haha

Also I like to read while I eat and I need one hand to hold the pages down.

howard hughes over here

to be honest though, I will bitesize-ify all the Chinese buffet green beans in one go

Laurel, if you get a Nook or a Kindle, you'll be able to eat using option #2 and not only read, but listen to music and play games!

i just throw the full plate into the processor and eat the much with my hands

"eat the much" sounds dirtier than it should

I think option 1 is considered pretty bad as far as table manners go for adults.

Option 2 is the best argument ever for the European method of holding silverware: fork kept, tines down, in left hand, knife kept in right throughout the meal.

This is how I eat probably because I learned form my Dad but also because switching hands after every cut just seems ridiculous.

Cause that's the American method, right? You cut and then switch hands? I can never remember.

fuckin Americans, how do they work

It is! I mean it would be, if people actually did that. Do they actually do that? That ridiculousness is probably, more than anything, the reason I still prefer to cut 4 bites at once.

what about option 1.5: cut up a portion of your food into bites, eat bites, repeat

woah i had not realised til now there was a difference between american and european methods!

or does that not really happen?

Option 3: What's a fork? #justeatwithyourhands #yesevensoup

I am not eating soup with a fork, ever

i can only imagine what you crazy bastards do with spoons

That reminds me of a (German??) expression of eating your brain-soup with a fork, ie being last in line the day they handed out smarts.

I used a knife to eat yogurt once because I was too lazy to go get a spoon. I made sure nobody was looking.

Because I didn't want them to see me being a Goop.

i eat peas with honey
i've done it all my life
it does taste kind of funny
but it keeps them on the knife

etc

http://www.dirtycitydesign.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2008/05/goops-295x300.jpg

I am not eating soup with a fork, ever

― I just like… I just have to say… (Starts crying) (DJP), Wednesday, April 27, 2011 3:08 PM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark

Oh I think you will.

http://www.petpeoplesplace.com/petstore/pet-image-large/campbells-chunky-soup-knife-with-fork-and-spoon_260770397881.jpg

oh man I'd forgotten what the Goops looked like! lol

omg at the chunky soup utensil

They are little bald-headed bad-mannered babies iirc!

i hold the knife in my left hand and hold the fork in the right. i'm left-handed so i do everything backwards.

x-post - I think you do!

Goops like like castoffs from Perry Bible Fellowship.

Pretty sure I've used my tongue to eat yogurt at some point, like just slurped it out of the container and then used a finger to scoop out the rest. Since we're being goops today.

Yeah I'm pretty sure I've done that too.

just keep crushing the yoghurt container at the bottom to get it close enough iirc

European style

The European style, also called the continental style, is to hold the fork in the left hand and the knife in the right throughout consumption. Once a bite-sized piece of food has been cut, it is conducted straight to the mouth by the left hand. There is no need to put down the knife.

In the American style, also called the zig-zag method, the knife is initially held in the right hand and the fork in the left. Holding food to the plate with the fork tines-down, a single bite-sized piece is cut with the knife. The knife is then set down on the plate, the fork transferred from the left hand to the right hand, and the food is brought to the mouth for consumption. The fork is then transferred back to the left hand and the knife is picked up with the right.

Laurel has a good point though - If I actually did it the American way I'd probably cut up all my food first too tbh.

pretty appalled at how the right has taken over america

why is "the american way" (in general) always WRONG? i didn't even know the european style of doing this was called "the european style" but i've been doing it my whole life.

we got here first tbph

My parents taught me the American way. I ate that way for about a week and then switched unprompted to the European way. When my parents objected, I told them that what they taught me was horribly inefficient and resulted in my food getting cold before I could finish it.

My whole family now eats the European way.

convert the rest of em and we'll have yis back

I just practiced both ways using a highlighter and a pen as my imaginary utensils and the 2nd way is just really cumbersome! I wonder if anyone really does that anymore. I'm going to start observing. Hope nobody walked by my desk just now.

what about option 1.5: cut up a portion of your food into bites, eat bites, repeat

i do this if i'm having a steak, for instance; will cut off an inch-wide steakstrip and then cut that strip into square-ish steakbites, eat da bites, then onto the next strip, et cetera. sure, the downside is that both the strip and the remainder (mainsteak) are going to cool faster than they would if left uncut, but who in the freaking heck is gonna make individual x and y cuts just to isolate an individual steakbite/preserve mainsteak's cumulative steaktemp. ridiculous.

btw this raster-based meat consumption technique is called SteakNique and it is a registered trademark of Ulillillia

If I am eating at home I usually just take a fork, stab something, lift it up, and take bites of it. That, or I cut it w/ my fork

fuck knives

my meat consumption is strictly vector-based (xp)

Even if I were using the continental method, I'd still cut more than one bite of steak at a time. You have to cut a strip out ANYWAY, I'm not going to make two tiny cuts at a 90-degree angle just to free a chunk!

i cut my meat on bezier curves, muthafucka

Also I would like to say AGAIN how the top side of silverware is the decorated side and the back is often either plain or just the stamped reverse of the pattern, a clear argument for holding the implement with the top side facing up.

hey, I use the American style (using my left hand for either utensil feels odd), I thought I was just an idiot. I mean I am, but now I have a get-out clause.

tbh since I don't eat meat I just do the sawing soft things with my fork a lot and I know that's not considered "proper" but I don't really give a shit if I'm at home. If I'm at a restaurant I'd be less likely to do that though. I think.

steak = object-based/vector
mashed potatoes = pixel-based/2D
peas = quantum food

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

i had a fish fillet from mcdonalds for lunch and ate it [via my hand]

most food i eat doesn't need to be cut

AMERICA
EATING MY LUNCH FROM A SINGLE BOWL
IN MY PARENTS BASEMENT
WHERE I'M LIVIN
HAPPY BIRTHDAY
I'M 43

failure pile in a sadness bowl

my breakfast is a bowlful of weed
then i skip lunch
then i have a leary biscuit for 4.20 snax
then six beers for din-din

brando didn't use a knife in last tango. why should i? i'm in mourning

I send my food over Slow Scan TV.

wheres the 'pre-chew food and spread resultant paste between some more food then eat' option

thread of disgusting savages
use chopsticks like the rest of the world

i can't eat rice with chopsticks :-(

I remember reading about the american swappy-forkey method in our World Book encyclopedias when I was a kid, and thinking it really bizarre. That said if I dont have anything to cut up at all (say I'm eating I dunno risotto or salad or pasta) I'll drop the knife and swap the fork but it stays that way. Going back and forth for each mouthful just seems... like. what.

Maybe one day we Americans will learn to eat faster. But for now we savor every precious bite.

fork eh?

We just use the knifey spooney method here, as you all know.

I'm Chinese

I honestly never knew there was an official" American way" til reading this thread. I just thought some people weren't taught correctlyl!
But I remember when we were first married Mr Veg being highly amused by my knife and fork action, joking about how "dainty" I was being.

Mr Veg just told me apparently Americans adopted the hand-switching method as some kind of protest against the Britishers in olden times. He said it's so that you can flip the Britishers bird while eating, lol

does anyone remember that woody woodpecker cartoon in which he's at a baseball game and he needs to open a bottle of soda pop and ends up using some guy's buck teeth as a church key?

anyhow, that's sort of how i clove my tofu.

Sometimes I do as Ms Laurel noted when reading a book, and chop up whatever I'm eating ahead so I can shovel it in me gob more easily. Especially with burritos and the like,

I probably use a fork/knife 2-3 times a month. when I do I usually do European, unless I'm at a hifalutin dinner, then I'll use the American method because it looks more 'stately' and 'restrained.'

catch me at home shoveling food into my mouth with chopsticks and/or a spoon though. fuck food that requires manual effort on the part of the eater.

swapey-forkey lols

Swappy, rather. Still funny.

the european method is also good because I feel like I could do more damage with my fork held tines-down at the ready, in case there was a fight at the dinner table, which is likely, because everybody has a knife.

hand-switching method is so the dominant hand does the knifing & then does the moving of the food the mouth, no, instead of asking the non-dominant hand to do something important like cut or move food to the mouth? plain sense imo

just seems tiring to me

assuming that the non-dominant hand is incapable of learning how to move food to the mouth assumes that all people suffer from a crippling lack of potassium and are prone to spasmodically jerking and twitching even when not at the dinner table, perhaps when having a bath or when flagging a taxi down

xp oh we are a nation of burly manly types, some of us attach weights to the forks and knives before we eat just to increase the challenge

assuming that the non-dominant hand is incapable of learning how to move food to the mouth assumes that all people suffer from a crippling lack of potassium and are prone to spasmodically jerking and twitching even when not at the dinner table, perhaps when having a bath or when flagging a taxi down

lol, you were mentioning chopsticks, I'm really good with 'em with the right hand but just thinking about me trying to use the left hand to maneuver chopsticks is making me laff

the proper way to use chopsticks, and shhh this is a secret, is to use one stick per hand, fyi

or use the joke ones that have a tiny fork on the end

this was so that in the Tang dynasty, should the Emperor be so inclined, he could launch into an impromptu drum solo in the midst of his grand meal of suckling pig and roast duck, in fact a set of drums were kept at the side of the dinner mat at every meal, just for the off-hand chance that everybody in the royal court had an urge to hear the sick breakdown from 'baba o riley'

lol

I noticed that in America if you go to a Thai/Chinese restaurant where you would normally get chopsticks, if they give you cutlery instead it's only a fork and no knife regardless of if you have a big piece of chicken or whatever which I find kind of difficult. Also I like to cut up noodles if they're really long!

anyway I would probably rank the utensils this way:
chopsticks >>>>>>>>>spoon>>>>>fork>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>knife>>>>>burying your face in your plate

I don't get how chopsticks are better than forks, forks can do everything that chopsticks can do AND MORE

except catch a fly I guess

you ever break a finger at the dinner table? try splinting that with a fork. nope, chopsticks.

or maybe you are having dinner with some of the fine citizens of brobdingnag, one of them says "man it would really hit the spot if I had a toothpick right now" and you say "no sweat, giant man, I've got you covered" and you hand him a chopstick and then he gives you a high five, and then you use the other chopstick to splint your now broken hand

try doing that with a fork

forks are also troublesome because like, how many tines is enough? how many tines is too much? do you go minimalist and only have two tines? do you take it all the way up to five? six? you crazy, man? wanna sit down, think it over?

two tines is not a fork imo

How do sporks (or splayds as I knew them as a kid) fit into all this.

sporks! you see, now that's the kind of bullshit I'm talking about. you'd never catch a chopstick pretending to be a forkstick, or a chopkick, or a chopknife, or a knifestick.

sporks are generally bullshit because they don't do the fork thing very well

chopsticks also scale down very well. you ever try eating something with a plastic knife and fork. plus that shit ain't biodegradable, holmes.

there are biodegradable forks, they are weird though

I noticed that in America if you go to a Thai/Chinese restaurant where you would normally get chopsticks, if they give you cutlery instead it's only a fork and no knife regardless of if you have a big piece of chicken or whatever which I find kind of difficult. Also I like to cut up noodles if they're really long!

Thai restaurants with chopsticks are posing, Thailand got hip to forks & spoons early on

I was debating posting this at all, but I had Thai food today and kept in mind that chopsticks are NOT traditional Thai implements. Used my spoon instead.

My companion did ask for chopsticks, and received them, and I specifically did not mention that they're not traditional because nobody likes a know-it-all.

Obviously I'm getting better at this shutting up thing.

i think historic chinese lore would have us believe that the introduction of chopsticks to thailand et al thousands of years ago was a direct leap from eating with yr hands

but maybe there were spoons. i mean, how hard could it be to make a spoon back in the day.

it's cool though, I welcome the use of chopsticks to eat every kind of food

you ever try eating skittles with chopsticks, its fun fun fun

i eat salad with chopsticks sometimes

now that's the spirit

is sushi and maki not traditionally eaten with yr hands too? as long as you wash yr hands

i have a feeling that in the end this is all about hygiene

I think nigiri is eaten with hands *puts out SS signal*

little known fact, during boom years Americans not only switch hands for cutting and eating, but switch forks out for new clean forks with each bite, sticking the used forks into the heel of the nearest proletariat

i eat skittles with banana leaves i.e., like normal people

i mean coconut spoons. whatever

i demand my sporks be the same way i like my women: brittle, numbered, cloving tofu

The Fork, the Knife, His Wife and her Chopstick

haha nice one Trayce

Am very patronisingly impressed with all you merkins eating like proper grown ups, I just hope you're holding your implements properly with the butt pressing into your palm, not poking out the side of your hand as if you're holding a pen.

I cut my fruit into perfectly equivalent, bite-size fractions - but I always make sure to eat the piece w/ the decal first.

eats, that's where dayo's not a-forking

forking hostile

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

Mr. Jaq and I were at brunch with friends this weekend, eating away. One of the friends says "whoa, are you guys both left handed?" Um no, just utensilling continental style.

hand-switching method is so the dominant hand does the knifing & then does the moving of the food the mouth, no, instead of asking the non-dominant hand to do something important like cut or move food to the mouth? plain sense imo
― five gone cats from Boston (underrated aerosmith bootlegs I have owned)

I hear the author of this post may have played a bit of guitar at some point. Maybe we should look into making guitar-playing more sensible by getting the dominant hand to do the important work of fretting, then swapping to strum also with dominant hand.

Just a thought, don't know why nobody's tried it yet.

(don't mind my snark, much love to everyone no matter how you eat; god knows the way I currently handle utensils used to prompt my mother to tell me I wasn't to do that if the Queen came round to tea, e.g. using the fork as a shovel)

fork-cum-shovel is one of the few redeeming qualities of the fork

Seriously, fuck chopsticks imo. The only thing they can do that a fork or spoon can't do better is grasp stray leafy things.

teen giggles @ fork-cum-shovel

chopsticks haters lookin mad that they suck at chopsticks imo

Chopsticks are great for noodles, too.

The chinese believe that cutting up food at the table is barbaric. You do that stuff in the kitchen beforehand.

I always heard that they thought that knives at the table was not a good idea.

I don't suck at chopsticks - I am completely and helplessly unable to use them. If I devoted myself to spending time practicing (and ignoring the hand cramps), I could probably achieve competence. Or I could spend the same amount of time learning how to juggle or striking a match with just my teeth or something equally pointless. But I'm cool with other people using them.

The European way of course. The first option is what I do for my kids.

It's so awesome that Dan convinced his parents to switch eating style!

Uh, I do switch my fork and knife at times.

My mom had to peel her orange with knife and fork while at boarding school. Of course she considered my eating style to be exceptionally impolite.

I'm of the cut-a-few-bites/eat them/repeat until finished school. I used to cut my steak into 36 little bites immediately and then abandon the knife, until I realized that the meat grows cold much faster than if left intact.

This notion of "European" dining methods is news to me too! Is there a European method for dressing as well? Sock/sock/shoe/shoe or sock/shoe/sock/shoe?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dhg_QIyMxZw

iirc

One generally doesn't switch hands for knife then fork

Is there a European method for dressing as well? Sock/sock/shoe/shoe or sock/shoe/sock/shoe?

I kind of hate to ask this but where are your pants in this scenario

Miss Manners says eating European style if you were born & raised in the states is an affectation.

I say Miss Manners is being pretty rude, casting aspersions on people's eating technique like that.

Miss Manners says eating European style if you were born & raised in the states is an affectation.

I have a kind of mixed style but then I did live in Europe for some time and I think she's essentially wrong inasmuch as a free American citizen may do as s/he pleases and there's nothing rude about this style of eating unless it's ostentatious - which in a sense it is less so than constantly switching hands. Sometimes I feel like most ppl want to go out of their way to be butthurt about almost everything.

Michael, this is Miss Manners you are talking about!

She would be "behindhurt".

Derriere distressed

now that just sounds like a florid way of saying diarrhea

Sometimes I feel like most ppl want to go out of their way to be butthurt about almost everything.

You rrrrrrang?

gluteal grimace

http://t1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSWr6Afc55L1AuGO_e02Lp090aujVGmASU--asAznnPI6siefnC&t=1

Patootie pained, DJP?

can-tankerous

^^^

lol

posteri-ire

hahaha

Ok ––– the context is, other etiquette officials/generally bossy people had claimed Continental style was the One True Path even within the states. (In fact, my friend's little brother once checked out a video at the library about how to have a proper meal, and the lady hosting this video was a real proselytizer about Continental style. She went so far as to insist the American style was invented to make brutish Americans eat slower or they'd all be food-bolting maniacs without it. The kid insisted we all use our knives & forks that way at dinner that night, and it was just impossible for me.) Miss Manners was writing in response to that, saying hand-switching is totally acceptable manners in the U.S., where it's commonly done, and that insisting on Continental style is an affectation.

I know that is totally different than what I said earlier.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pkcJEvMcnEg&feature=relmfu

yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeah

I eat european style.

My girlfriend is kind of weird, she does reverse european style, knife in left hand and fork in right, despite being right-handed. She says it's convenient because you don't really need your knife all the time, so you can just lay it down when not using it.

and that insisting on Continental style is an affectation.

Worse, it's just rude. I don't much go in for the class-signifiers in French eating, for example, though I know quite a few of them and will obey them when it's more politic to do so. Mostly I just want ppl to enjoy themselves, eat naturally though w/o too much gore, open mouth chewing and the like.

I do find real proper American dining etiquette sometimes even more stultifying and joyless than the French style.

WHAT are some of those signifiers??? I'm curious now.

was eating with a big group this weekend in america (MA) and remembered this question and so looked around and EVERYONE was eating with only a fork except for me (i was eating as usual continental/euro style)! but we were in the countryside, so i'm thinking maybe some people were just feeling relaxed about their table manners.

i only use a knife when i need it, like for steak or something... why bother cutting up a green bean or w/e...

I'm curious now.

You don't cut lettuce. (This had something to do with tarnishing silver, iIrc)

No slurping or pointing the end of your spoon in your mouth nor tipping the bowl to get the dregs.

You don't use your bread to mop up anything and if you must, you use your fork. (That style of eating is straight-up peasant style in a country where bread is the staple.)

You don't take too much bread, or fail to affably offer wine/water/more of a dish to your table companions if you (re) serve yourself, regardless of whether they're still drinking/eating.

You're not supposed to rest your elbows on the table but it's considered suspicious to rest your hands on your lap (out of sight) too, so you're supposed to rest your wrists on the table.

Knowing how to subtly shiv a dining companion (with the proper knife, of course) without getting blood on the hostess's table linens is a skill held in high regard.

That kind of thing...

You're not supposed to rest your elbows on the table but it's considered suspicious to rest your hands on your lap (out of sight) too, so you're supposed to rest your wrists on the table.

This isn't just a French thing. The no elbows on the table was big for both my parents (Erica, Erica willing and able get your elbows off the table - oh lord that was awful) but hands in lap was a big no no for my Dad. You have to have your wrist like leaning on the the edge of the table.

Most of that stuff is just 'polite' western style eating...

Yeah. Btw this was like when I was kid and they were first teaching me table manners not like as a teen or anything.

I rarely use knives because most of the stuff I eat I can just cut with the side of a fork. I know that's not "correct" but I don't really care unless I'm somewhere really fancy.

I usually just pile everything onto my (paper) plate, bend it in half taco style and use it as a funnel

Elbows on the table was a huge no growing up...I gleefully do it now that Im a grownup in my house, but I dont do it if Im a guest or eating somewhere nice, old habits die hard

Elbows in when cutting yr steak etc, no "wings; other general ones were Wait til everyone is seated to begin eating; also ask permission to leave the table when you're done eating

Now I'm trying to recall if I committed any notable faux pas when I dined at MW's. I'd give my table manners a solid B but my posture a C- at best.

Also, I handle my knife and fork Eurostyle.

xxp when you put that half-eaten artichoke on your face like a clown's nose I knew I could relax.

Yeah all of those for me too VG but I think those are just standard good manners like MW said.

A couple years ago I was having coffee with a friend of mine who stood up when I excused myself to go to the bathroom. I LOLed. I mean, manners are nice and everything but this was a cup of coffee at some neighborhood coffee place. Such an old-fashioned thing seemed really weird and out of place. I had to ask him not to do it because it made me feel really strange.

I remember my ex-wife getting exasperated at American dinners when ppl would put everything out buffet-style and the diners would put every course on their plate. She'd say, "The salad isn't going to get warm!" (Salad is a palate cleanser after the main course in France.) I think she found it slightly gluttinous and lazy to eat what she considered several courses at once, if not disrespectful to the food and its quality.

when you put that half-eaten artichoke on your face like a clown's nose I knew I could relax

LOL

Wait til everyone is seated to begin eating

In France, if it's hot food, it's wait till three people have been served at least but don't let the host/ess see you letting your food get cold.

TOO MANY RULES.

I am never eating with French people.

I cooked Christmas dinner one year and kind of flipped out at my inlaws for not waiting for me to sit down before they started eating. Now whenever I cook they all sit like naughty children watching me to see if it's okay to eat, lol

It was Christmas! I make no apologies for enforcing basuc decency

More people by men wearing hats at the dinner table tbh.

It's pretty easy, ENBB, actually and it actually seemed slightly more rational than our rules - there's more Protestant joylessness in good American dining etiquette and a proper French hostess will always move heaven and Earth for her dinner never to descend to lugubrity or rancor.

No elbows on the table*, no touching your hair or face at the table, never heard the one about not hiding your hands in your lap as I am a PRO at eating like my left arm is broken, ie leaving it in my lap like a dead thing for the entire meal basically.

* Exception to elbow rule: apparently it's allowable to put your elbows on the table between courses? Don't know where I read this but it's rattling around my brain for some reas.

When I worked as a banquet waiter, we had one client who had us serve the salad after the main course and all the guests, even the guests at the client's table, were like "what the HELL is going on here." The client was visibly irritated at her friends' lack of sophistication.

That's an Italian thing, isn't it?

*more UPSET I should have said

VG, I'm kind of the opposite. If I'm cooking/serving, I'll tell ppl not to stand (sit?) on ceremony and start to eat even if I'm still darting back to the kitchen for something.

Apropos, I think I was gently schooled by French women on good (French) table manners by their saying something along the lines of, "Well, here we generally don't do X but as long as your enjoying my cooking/yourself/the dinner, I don't wan't to spoil your fun. We're not that stuffy", etc...

That's an Italian thing, isn't it?

French, too. I agree with them; eat the hot food first and save the salad to clean palate before dessert/cheese.

totes

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

I attended an table etiquette course when I was at a summer program for (lol) information technology, guess they figured nerds needed grooming

I specifically remember that large salad leaves should be cut with fork/knife and that french fries, contrary to popular belief, are not a finger food!!

also another thing I hate about forks is the feeling you get when you accidentally bite down onto it, or when the metal touches your teeth, it's all scrapey and metallic and ugggghhhh

you can always just put your face up to the plate and bite the food and then pull it into your mouth

actually, don't even waste a plate, just eat it right out of the package

You don't use your bread to mop up anything and if you must, you use your fork.
But this is the best way to use bread! It's not called 'the edible napkin' for nothing.

a knife, a fork, a bottle and a cork

Yeah now I tihnk about it my Italian ex's mum always served up a salad after the mains, it was usually cubed fennel with a dressing, I never ate it but only because I dont like fennel.

Also the extreme stuffiness of "no elbows on the table", "no wings out", "dont mop up with bread" etc is so freaking joyless. I recall awkward, stiff, polite formal dinners in my childhood and it was an utter JOY to sit down with a big noisy italian family and eat good, lovingly cooked food, be encouraged to eat as much as you could cram in, and mop up sauces and oils with bread (butter on bread is a no no!)

I wonder if the American style of fork use came about because we didn't use forks much until the mid 19th Century.