BEASTMASTER!

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Pace the Douglas Sirk thread. If yer gonna do crap movies, you can do it right. And the Beastmaster films are for the true connossieuers of crap among us.

Can't beat John Amos in a loincloth!

― Tad (llamasfur), Monday, 14 October 2002 09:17 (twenty-three years ago)

Tori Amos in a loincloth would be far more appealing.

― MarkH (MarkH), Monday, 14 October 2002 09:28 (twenty-three years ago)

Braxus 'Lord of the Pit' (in Beastmaster III, screened on C5 about 3- 4 weeks ago).
BRAXUS (to unseen creatures in the pit): "Come my people, the hour of your release is at hand. Come, and we will spread hell-fire across the land!"

BEASTMASTER: "Not so fast Braxus. You have to deal with me first.."

-- David ([email protected]), March 18th, 2002.

― David (David), Monday, 14 October 2002 10:10 (twenty-three years ago)

I've just noticed that Beastmaster is an anagram of Beatmasters, as in, "watch out Tiree, we got faster, this is the sound of the cool..." This may or may not be significant.

― MarkH (MarkH), Monday, 14 October 2002 10:16 (twenty-three years ago)

seven years pass...

I just noticed that Beastmaster was directed by Don Coscarelli of PHANTASM fame.

― Nate Carson, Tuesday, 22 December 2009 01:08 (sixteen years ago)

ten years pass...

I just watched this on Amazon prime after being traumatised by this as a child.

Its so weirdly toned.

80% is basically a Campbellesque Hero's journey by a He-Man analogue directed straight at 10 year old boys,

then there is female nudity and hurling children into pits of flame.

the Phantasm link makes sense as a fan of that film as there is a craftsmanship and commitment, but also a Grand Guignol love of spectacle/horror that is not age appropriate.

reading up on it, the UK version was heavily cut for a PG rating, which explains why I was traumatized by the body sucking creatures and the metal masked bezerkers, but didnt get to see the impalement or nude bathing scenes.

― my opinionation (Hamildan), Wednesday, 19 August 2020 14:19 (five years ago)

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