The far from obligatory due to excess non-tennis watchers (not that they count as real people anyway) but neverthelees, the Australian Open Thread

Venus just got broken; she & sis seem to be hit/miss so far but you'd still be brave to bet against one of them winning.

Dan: with you on Chanda, she could upset Clijsters, but Lindsay? Oh, no - Henin will take her apart, surely?

This should be Federer's year, but that's a nasty looking draw. Vinciguerra shouldn't be too tricky, but then it's the winner of Nalbandian-Malisse (repeat of that brutal Wimbledon semi), followed by Blake or Safin. Poor Rog. Perhaps in SW19 in the summer.

Roddick seems the only threat to Lleyton in his quarter, but Vicente might flummox the Nebraskan. As Clive James wrote of Jimmy Connors in 1979, "he spent so much time trying to straighten out Borg's curves, er, blah blah blah." Can't remember the rest, you get the gist.

Ooh... Kim C & Ms Shaughnessy through to the last 16 already. Roger F a set and a break up, Malisse a set up, Maleeva a set down.

[I'm keeping my options open by pasting this from the other thread... Roger F now two sets and a break up, Serena 6-1 first set vs Tamarine, Nalbandian storming back vs Xavier]

The King v. Party Time, Excellent

If Hewitt last Monday had tried to play with his eyes shut or hopping on one foot, or by some other means had contrived to lose his first match, the second round game would have been Larkham-Larssen.

ESPN2 on weekdays, I don't know about weekends.

They really should move this to March.

Now is the time on Sprockets when we point at Lleyton Hewitt and laugh.

No sooner do things open up for Jimmy B and Roger F than they blow their chances. Nalbandian is supposed to be the Chris Lewis de nos jours, i.e. not this good. Roddick the next to implode under weight of expectation?

Disappointed by Rubin's collapse, elated by Henin's gutsy win. She showed enough in the first set and a half to suggest she could trouble Venus; but thereafter the signs were not so positive.

I'm starting to think that Nalbandian is the Rodney Dangerfield of men's tennis.

Dan, I can even visualise a future moment when I might be forced to consider a possibility that at some stage a vaguely viable argument could be made that 'Nailbags' could, if he keeps up his current form, begin to look almost half-convincingly like the genuine article.

His effort against Roger Fed certainly didn't make that moment look any more distant.

Is Melboune Park becoming Lleyton's equivalent to Greg N's Augusta?

I see they're all raring to go on Day 9. Time for bed, then.

Which means I have to root for Meghann S.

Nalbandian doesn't get the respect he deserves, I think, largely because he had a lot of good results last year and people STILL seem to be surprised when he gets past the second round.

He also sez that if he wins, Steffi's gonna play mixed doubles with him at the French Open.

Meanwhile, the Korbach Krewkut nutmegs Bandy and awaits Vowel Boy or Razor in the second men's semi. Roddick appears to be hanging on gamely in the opening set at the mo', big serves fending off a second break chance for Yoonaldo.

Roddick has a point for 19-all...

Roddick must be completely spent. I fear Rainer S may be in the final by default.

Meanwhile, Aggs is pounding Freckles: 6-2 6-2 3-3. Ooh, he has another break point... and that's probably that.

I missed the Clijster Disijster, except for that priceless moment when the ABC switched fron the cricket to Kim's first match point, which she stuffed, then the next, and the rest was history (especially her).

A real pity because the Rene was my fave fantasy victim of that Bunnings ad where the hand reaches over the net and pounds the other player into the ground with their own racquet.

Kim had better not do that again or the local media will start bandying around that particularly ugly word which particularly ugly types of sports fan love to pick up on, which is often associated with Mama Cass and a well known Australian golfer. The same fate may soon loom for her boyfriend as well.

Lendl wore that unfortunate epithet (around his neck? Like a...?) for years until he was #1 for 200-odd weeks and people started to forget all those losing GS finals. Agassi too.

Wimbledon may be a silly anachronism in many ways, but, for an event with a rest day, I think it handles the scheduling of matches better than the other grand slams. I mean, playing the two halves of the draw on different days *right up to the semis* (or quarters for the women) - major dud, surely? Agassi now gets an extra day's rest, as if he needed it. And the US Open's Super Saturday - at least they've been persuaded to move the women's final to the Sunday in recent years.

Rainhill Shuttle and Aromatherapia a set each at the mo'.

If Suet does win he should give 10% to Casablanca Charlie for keeping him on court till 1.30 the other night.

Is Fassbinder showing any signs that he could trouble the Agster?

Steffi, drag the racquets out of the shed and start practising now.

(but come on Venus in the snigles final anyway)

Schuey had a little purple patch in the middle of the first set vs Mr Graf, but was outclassed either side of that and lost it 2-6. The coffee I had at 2am should see me through to match point at this rate.

See you all in Paris.

Speaking of which, who will finally drive a metaphorical size ten R.M. boot up the backside of Venus or Serena and increase the possible winners of a women's slam from one (plus another possible longshot outsider) to as many as three?

Tennis fans Down Under will have plenty of time to ponder these matters after Andre the Astronaut blasted the Shuttle into outer space. In fact, the challenge from Schuttler stayed airborne only slightly longer than the shuttle called Challenger did that fateful day exactly 17 years ago.

Love it. He's always been my favorite tennis player and I hate when guys think she's ugly. Can't wait for mixed doubles.

I actually saw him at a friend's show at the Lion's Den in the Village a few years ago when he was Mr. Shields (no, not that Mr. Shields). Ms. Shields danced the whole time to their awful moonlighting soap opera star friend's band. He hung out in the shadows in a back corner. Interesting. Unfortunately they took off before my friend's (excellent) band came on.

WS? No one is gonna beat them anytime soon. I really feel for Venus, though. She had her chance last night. she's always been my favorite *sigh*