Search and Destroy: Breaking up with a live-in girl/boy/etc/friend.

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So I've been with this girl for a year, right, and I just worked up the nerve to break it off. We've been living together for 6 months--how does one work through the problems of moving out (well, her problem--it's my apartment) and splitting up communal stuff and all that? I don't know if it's totally inappropriate to ask for this kind of advice in a light-hearted forum such as this, but I'm lost. I'm 20 years old, I don't know how to do this shit.

Oh, and while I was at work yesterday she came in and (while packing up her stuff and moving it out) STOLE MY POT. How am I supposed to go to work now?

― adam, Saturday, 25 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Try travelling in a bowl or basin perhaps

― Ronan, Saturday, 25 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

I kind of saw that one coming. I ended up just taking the streetcar and some reds.

― adam, Saturday, 25 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Well, it's a bit of a pain in the ass to do, because there's bound to be some arguing over whose stuff is whose...just keep your cool and explain your side of why you think XYZ is yours. I mean, a lot of it is going to be indisputably yours and indisputably hers. As for communal property, divide up as to who needs it most and who used it most while you were together.

― Ally, Saturday, 25 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Actually, I think I'm really just upset about the dope. Oh well.

― adam, Saturday, 25 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Ah, true love.

― jess, Saturday, 25 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

'Dope will get you through times of no love better than love will get you through times of no dope" blah blah

― Andrew L, Saturday, 25 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

It's sort of a cut-your-losses period, now, isn't it? As in, "I'm not going to bitch and argue and try to prove that I was right all along -- let's just get everything settled so we can go on with our lives." You can always get more weed later, and I guarantee you it'll be much more enjoyable to smoke when you can look around your apartment and not have loose ends lying about.

― Nitsuh, Saturday, 25 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

when i split with mine, she got the video, i got the stereo - dealable trades abounded, but it was very much a both-sides thing...now we live together again, but she has someone else - the video and stereo have separte rooms.i'd go to the plocie over the stolen pot though.

― Geoff, Saturday, 25 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

my guy said he would be back to sort his stuff out in a month I never saw him again until last month i got a postcard from the us saying he was coming to New zealand to get his stuff. Its been 4 years and all his cloths are at the cith nission, a junkie no hoper friend has his 21st leather jacket and im not parting with his Prince or & collection nor the James Bond collection. I sold the jeep and what will he do with a drier. If he didnt have the guts to sort it out years ago its tough titties.

― julie white, Sunday, 26 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

God, I wish I'd seen this thread earlier. I'm going through this right now. Got up with every intention of phoning round and emailing people about flats, and got up and looked at all my stuff spread round the flat and just started to cry.

Like it's not hard enough, trying to break up with someone I'm still desperately in love with, but now I have to go through the hell of trying to find a new place to live yet again, for the second time in 3 months. I so thought that I wouldn't have to move again until we "got married and moved to a great big house in the country".

I don't know if I'm putting off finding another house and packing and everything because I'm still malingering in hopes that the relationship is salvagable, or if I'm just too heartbroken and upset to really *deal* with the horrors of moving again. But moving is the last thing I want to be doing right now.

I might actually just give up and go and stay with my Mum until it all blows over and enough pain is gone for me to be able to handle moving. Christ.

― Kate the Saint, Tuesday, 28 August 2001 00:00 (twenty-four years ago)

six years pass...

hey i got back together with this girl and we lived together forever and broke up for real last month. so let me change the thread question to "i remember how to interact with women as a single dude at like age 19 but how does one do it at age 26?"

also later i found the weed. it was under the couch and i have felt guilty for the last 6+ years about internet-accusing her of stealing it.

― adam, Friday, 25 January 2008 00:39 (eighteen years ago)

In your original post I thought you meant your cooking pot and couldn't understand your anger.

― Bonita Applebum, Friday, 25 January 2008 00:57 (eighteen years ago)

great thread!

― That mong guy that's shit, Friday, 25 January 2008 00:58 (eighteen years ago)

wow

― elan, Friday, 25 January 2008 01:01 (eighteen years ago)

haha

― Jordan, Friday, 25 January 2008 01:05 (eighteen years ago)

"i remember how to interact with women as a single dude at like age 19 but how does one do it at age 26?"

With great difficulty.

― Alex in SF, Friday, 25 January 2008 01:14 (eighteen years ago)

more of these types of revives! people, do your denouements

― s.rose, Friday, 25 January 2008 01:43 (eighteen years ago)

"i remember how to interact with women as a single dude at like age 19 but how does one do it at age 26?"

from experience uncannily alike yours- it's a lot easier.

― darraghmac, Friday, 25 January 2008 13:00 (eighteen years ago)

it's exactly the same. only those 19 yr old girls are more interested now. and they assume your additional years of experience will mean you're better at sex. lol naive.

― Upt0eleven, Friday, 25 January 2008 13:11 (eighteen years ago)

five years pass...

hey so i'm getting married to a different and way more awesome girl in like two months. fiancee and the ex from upthread are bros and they hang out. it's cool i suppose. getting old is weird.

― adam, Thursday, 14 March 2013 01:16 (thirteen years ago)

...it's been an interesting few months.

― Ned Raggett, Thursday, 14 March 2013 01:17 (thirteen years ago)

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