"Job Search"

Dear M & D,
How are things. I am fine. How's the weather back home? That's what good about living in a big famous place, if you're curious about it just switch the TV on. Meanwhile, I can't find any news about home even if I Google it! LOL
Anyway - I guess you know about how bad the economy is, all the war stuff etc. unfortunaely, I got laid off. However, look at this as an opportunity! I've decided that rather than get another oppressive, boring job working with dull, mediocre drones, I will instead research the farthest reaches of my inner psychological landscape with the help of psychedelic chemicals. Due to prolonged and extensive self-medication, I am learning the secrets of consciousness - and what's more, my psychedelic voyages take me all over the cosmos without having to leave the house! (I haven't left my room in a week now!)
So next time your friends brag about how great THEIR kids are doing, just tell them that YOURS is making incredible breakthroughs in the science of consciousness! Like yesterday I discovered that if I put a bit of sandpaper on the turntable, incredibly complex percussive patterns emerge! Especially after three hours! (Or maybe it was 11 minutes, I don't know. I'll have to repeat the experiment with these pills I bought last night!)
On a personal note - you were asking about the gf - I haven't actually seen her in months, we had some differences - she was just too materialistic and ambitious for me! (ie nag nag nag! LOL) For the moment I prefer 'imaginary' relationships like the one I'm having with a model who appears in various magazines. Less chance of 'personality clashes' with two-dimensional pictures! Anyway about those funerals you mentioned, I DID send cards but they must've got lost or something (crap Royal Mail! grrr :( ). Also unfortunately I lost my addresses, could you send them again, maybe putting a 'skull' symbol next to the ones I have to RE-SEND the condolence cards to, so I don't forget :) - dave