ilXorite most likely to be in a porno flick

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Don't lie. It has been on your mind for a long time. Who here is most likely (if they haven't done so already) to be a blue stud or studette?

― pedro the jaguar, Sunday, 9 March 2003 03:06 (twenty-three years ago)

This should be pretty obvious!

― donut bitch (donut), Sunday, 9 March 2003 03:11 (twenty-three years ago)

Say it isn't so!

― pedro the jaguar, Sunday, 9 March 2003 03:12 (twenty-three years ago)

Eyeball Kicks!

― cuspidorian, Sunday, 9 March 2003 03:25 (twenty-three years ago)

1. Jack Cole (blue boy shorts) 2. Martin Skidmore 3. Kate and Ally

― pedro the jaguar (pedro the jaguar), Sunday, 9 March 2003 03:33 (twenty-three years ago)

If we're talking professional, I've not been in one.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Sunday, 9 March 2003 10:42 (twenty-three years ago)

martin i kiss you

― mark s (mark s), Sunday, 9 March 2003 12:24 (twenty-three years ago)

i was in a foot-fetish, ummm, specialty video... [but i dont get naked.]

― phil-two (phil-two), Sunday, 9 March 2003 12:57 (twenty-three years ago)

The movie I was in is illegal because they filmed it when I was dead

― dave q, Sunday, 9 March 2003 13:04 (twenty-three years ago)

HEY! I've never been in a porno flick. (That I'm aware of.) I'd be far fare more likely to *make* a porno flick, considering my alarming habit of convincing DDB's to strip off and let me take polaroids of them.

― kate (suzy), Sunday, 9 March 2003 15:02 (twenty-three years ago)

i was in a foot-fetish, ummm, specialty video

Phil-two, you are the blonde from Joe Millionaire?

For some reason I could see Jess maybe being in a porno, but I don't know. It isn't something that's been on my mind for a long time.

― Nicole (Nicole), Sunday, 9 March 2003 15:09 (twenty-three years ago)

Nicole!

― N. (nickdastoor), Sunday, 9 March 2003 15:10 (twenty-three years ago)

Kate, I can just see the ads in Magnet: "The Studpuppies of Shoegaze: Your favorite dronerock boyz get even dirrrtier than you ever imagined."

― j.lu (j.lu), Sunday, 9 March 2003 15:13 (twenty-three years ago)

Nicole!

Oh, shut up, you.

― Nicole (Nicole), Sunday, 9 March 2003 15:14 (twenty-three years ago)

Sorry - I genuinely misread it as 'it is something that's been on my mind for a long time.

― N. (nickdastoor), Sunday, 9 March 2003 15:15 (twenty-three years ago)

That's because you're a perv.

― Nicole (Nicole), Sunday, 9 March 2003 15:16 (twenty-three years ago)

My fantasy life, perverted as it is, does not involve you watching Jess in a porno movie.

― N. (nickdastoor), Sunday, 9 March 2003 15:17 (twenty-three years ago)

At least, it didn't until this moment. GET OUT OF MY HEAD.

― N. (nickdastoor), Sunday, 9 March 2003 15:18 (twenty-three years ago)

GET OUT OF MY HEAD.

Believe me, I would take out a restraining order against that sort of thing were it possible.

― Nicole (Nicole), Sunday, 9 March 2003 15:21 (twenty-three years ago)

:-O

― jess (dubplatestyle), Sunday, 9 March 2003 16:16 (twenty-three years ago)

Is that a blow up doll?

― N. (nickdastoor), Sunday, 9 March 2003 16:17 (twenty-three years ago)

i am just a shy country boy at heart

― jess (dubplatestyle), Sunday, 9 March 2003 16:22 (twenty-three years ago)

FAPS = Fancy a Porno Shoot? ILX porn by ILXors for ILXors! Think of how little money would be involved! Think of the massive music library we'd have access too, much of it appropriate! Think of the nasty fetishes! Think of the DVDs we could release with Dan Perry doing commentary!

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Sunday, 9 March 2003 16:23 (twenty-three years ago)

But most of all, think of the children.

― N. (nickdastoor), Sunday, 9 March 2003 16:24 (twenty-three years ago)

Sean, that idea is almost as nasty as the term "bootyflakes".

― Nicole (Nicole), Sunday, 9 March 2003 16:27 (twenty-three years ago)

Volume 1: kate disciplines a string of Dirty Dronerock Boys while they whimper in the corner. For the S&M fans, for the DDB fans or for the terminally curious!

Volume 2: dave q acts as matchmaker, bringing together hundreds and hundreds of unlikely combatan...er, partners! See Gino Vanelli bumping uglies with Styx! See David Thomas getting smooooove with Bryan Ferry!

Volume 3: Country boy jess does it in the hay while farm animals watch on.

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Sunday, 9 March 2003 16:33 (twenty-three years ago)

Volume 4: Sean C makes the most Canadian porno flick ever, with no actual nudity, just people sitting around talking about stuff, drinking beer and saying 'eh'.

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Sunday, 9 March 2003 17:22 (twenty-three years ago)

while farm animals watch on

― Ed (dali), Sunday, 9 March 2003 17:25 (twenty-three years ago)

but bruce le bruce is from canada.

― anthony easton (anthony), Sunday, 9 March 2003 17:29 (twenty-three years ago)

Wait, you mean someone had a video camera at one of our FAPs?!?

― Kim (Kim), Sunday, 9 March 2003 18:05 (twenty-three years ago)

martin i kiss you

Is this the start of the plot to the ILX porno, Mark?

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Sunday, 9 March 2003 18:59 (twenty-three years ago)

I'll get the Mazola!

― Lara (Lara), Sunday, 9 March 2003 19:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Remeber when you told me not to worry?
While I'm worried now.

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Sunday, 9 March 2003 19:11 (twenty-three years ago)

But don't know you... the mazola is only an accelerant to aid in the collection of DNA for clone manufacture!

― kate (suzy), Sunday, 9 March 2003 19:25 (twenty-three years ago)

kate-

you, of all people, should know that the only acceptable lubricant in these cases is SUPERGLUE.

― Maestro Dave, Sunday, 9 March 2003 19:28 (twenty-three years ago)

Listening to Tom Waits, I can't not stop giggling about The Black Rider. Dammit Kate, you've ruined one of my favorite Wait's albums.

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Sunday, 9 March 2003 19:38 (twenty-three years ago)

Sean I'd like to discretely purchase vol 1.

― Leee (Leee), Sunday, 9 March 2003 19:57 (twenty-three years ago)

but bruce le bruce is from canada.
Just who the hell is that? I read the occassional article with his name on it from Exclaim, is he one of those people whose name I should know just cause they are a celebrity without a cause?
Peter North is from Nova Scotia if I recall.

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Sunday, 9 March 2003 20:39 (twenty-three years ago)

bruce le bruce is an artsy fag porno god.

― anthony easton (anthony), Sunday, 9 March 2003 20:43 (twenty-three years ago)

and does what exactly?

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Sunday, 9 March 2003 20:44 (twenty-three years ago)

I think I'm kind of offended that Leee isn't interested in volume 4.

― Kim (Kim), Sunday, 9 March 2003 20:45 (twenty-three years ago)

He hasn't seen the risque pictures, and I hope for our sake he doesn't.

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Sunday, 9 March 2003 20:46 (twenty-three years ago)

I still haven't seen the "lipstick" one myself - Sean, please tell me that got deleted?

― Kim (Kim), Sunday, 9 March 2003 20:57 (twenty-three years ago)

Nope, sorry, but you can all download it at www.canucklipstickfetish.com!

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Sunday, 9 March 2003 22:10 (twenty-three years ago)

How much money would it take to delete it?

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Sunday, 9 March 2003 22:22 (twenty-three years ago)

How much do ya got?

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Sunday, 9 March 2003 22:36 (twenty-three years ago)

I got what you < offkey>neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeed< /offkey>!

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Sunday, 9 March 2003 22:39 (twenty-three years ago)

Oddly, the lipstick pics are some of the more innocuous pics we got of you that night.

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Sunday, 9 March 2003 22:48 (twenty-three years ago)

Don't be a meany.

― Mr Noodles (Mr Noodles), Sunday, 9 March 2003 22:58 (twenty-three years ago)

Subthread:
TS:W ho on this donut bitch? v Who up in this donut bitch?

― lucas (lucas), Sunday, 9 March 2003 23:07 (twenty-three years ago)

You people are grotesque perverts = I love you.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 10 March 2003 03:11 (twenty-three years ago)

Oh, that reminds me:

Volume 5: Chris V collects tons of old porn movies and digitally edits them all so that all of the heads are digitally edited out and replace with NED.

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Monday, 10 March 2003 03:48 (twenty-three years ago)

Come on Sean, NO ONE is gonna buy that.

― Kim (Kim), Monday, 10 March 2003 03:53 (twenty-three years ago)

except Ned's legion of fans

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Monday, 10 March 2003 03:58 (twenty-three years ago)

It will be essential watching at drunken FAPs

― Vic (Vic), Monday, 10 March 2003 03:59 (twenty-three years ago)

Vol 5: Come to Neddy

― donut bitch (donut), Monday, 10 March 2003 04:17 (twenty-three years ago)

dir. chris cunningham

― jess (dubplatestyle), Monday, 10 March 2003 04:19 (twenty-three years ago)

Come on Sean, NO ONE is gonna buy that.

Ned might?

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Monday, 10 March 2003 04:24 (twenty-three years ago)

ok, he's a sick bastard - but is he that sick?

― Kim (Kim), Monday, 10 March 2003 04:31 (twenty-three years ago)

Hrm hrm. I think Kim wants to see this more than me.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 10 March 2003 04:36 (twenty-three years ago)

Looks like we've got a brisk business going on here.

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Monday, 10 March 2003 04:55 (twenty-three years ago)

Now yr just a regular bastard - damn you!

― Kim (Kim), Monday, 10 March 2003 05:05 (twenty-three years ago)

:-(

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 10 March 2003 05:11 (twenty-three years ago)

don't think that's gonna work. i am heartless.

― Kim (Kim), Monday, 10 March 2003 05:17 (twenty-three years ago)

Look at it this way, Ned, at least you still have the video.

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Monday, 10 March 2003 05:19 (twenty-three years ago)

Sweet memories.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 10 March 2003 05:28 (twenty-three years ago)

eleven months pass...

http://starstarstar.net/ilm.JPG

jeann3: okay, seriously, that sign is primed for a porn set
teeny: oh no! ilm porn!
jeann3: and what's it above? some kind of pleather couch?
teeny: no it's shiny cardboard
jeann3: ilm porn would be the most hideous boring porn ever
jeann3: can you imagine the verbal exhanges?
teeny: hey, some people like to see others jerking off ;-)
jeann3: oh well, um, yes of course. i'm just thinking of "Baby, give me your hot OutKast." "I got Metal Machine Music on first press-vinyl. You like that? You like it?!"
jeann3: dear god, i can't stand myself sometimes
teeny: hahaha should I start a thread?
jeann3: oh god yes
jeann3: she said breathlessly

― teeny (teeny), Tuesday, 9 March 2004 22:41 (twenty-two years ago)

EXCEPT THEN I GOT HERE AND SAW THAT SOMEONE HAD ALREADY STARTED AN ILX PORN THREAD, WTF?

― teeny (teeny), Tuesday, 9 March 2004 22:42 (twenty-two years ago)

oops except it's 2004 now and not 2003. carry on.

― teeny (teeny), Tuesday, 9 March 2004 22:47 (twenty-two years ago)

Teeny and Jeanne are hilariously otm.

― El Diablo Robotico (Nicole), Tuesday, 9 March 2004 22:50 (twenty-two years ago)

I'll contact my ex and have her put us in touch with a producer or two.

― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, 9 March 2004 22:53 (twenty-two years ago)

Jon Williams used to fuck bitchez on his webcam.

― Ian Johnson (orion), Tuesday, 9 March 2004 22:56 (twenty-two years ago)

:-O

― cozen (Cozen), Tuesday, 9 March 2004 22:57 (twenty-two years ago)

I remain in awe.

― luna (luna.c), Tuesday, 9 March 2004 22:58 (twenty-two years ago)

the truth is stranger than fiction, you know

― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, 9 March 2004 22:59 (twenty-two years ago)

Wow, I'm so up for this.

― Andrew (enneff), Tuesday, 9 March 2004 22:59 (twenty-two years ago)

As a cinematograhper, of course.

― Andrew (enneff), Tuesday, 9 March 2004 22:59 (twenty-two years ago)

I did?

― LITTLE LAMB [Jon Williams] (ex machina), Tuesday, 9 March 2004 23:00 (twenty-two years ago)

you told me you did!

― Ian Johnson (orion), Tuesday, 9 March 2004 23:01 (twenty-two years ago)

fortchunder.com

― dean! (deangulberry), Tuesday, 9 March 2004 23:02 (twenty-two years ago)

I blame Nicole for the vision I have in my head of Julio starring in a film full of insane foxy Amazonian robots intoning "DEVIRGINIZE HIM!" in heartless metallic tones.

But it's still Skidmore, really.

― Matt DC (Matt DC), Tuesday, 9 March 2004 23:09 (twenty-two years ago)

I think I was visible naked on my webcam eating:

http://www.davidj.com/images/faq/KrispieKreme.jpg

after I had sex with someone.

― LITTLE LAMB [Jon Williams] (ex machina), Tuesday, 9 March 2004 23:10 (twenty-two years ago)

This has disturbed me.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 9 March 2004 23:14 (twenty-two years ago)

That this thread was revived on its exact one year anniversary has disturbed me.

― donut bitch (donut), Tuesday, 9 March 2004 23:16 (twenty-two years ago)

Spring fever, I suppose.

― El Diablo Robotico (Nicole), Tuesday, 9 March 2004 23:32 (twenty-two years ago)

"Devirginizing Julio" would be a great porno title.

― El Diablo Robotico (Nicole), Tuesday, 9 March 2004 23:33 (twenty-two years ago)

the sequel to "Eating Raoul"

― Donna Brown (Donna Brown), Tuesday, 9 March 2004 23:57 (twenty-two years ago)

"Manfrank Creamroller"

― donut bitch (donut), Wednesday, 10 March 2004 00:01 (twenty-two years ago)

Hrmm, this gives me an idea for a feature I may implement at some stage. Imagine if you could see what the New Answers page looked like at any one time in history, and read threads with all posts after a certain date removed? That'd be pretty interesting.

― Andrew (enneff), Wednesday, 10 March 2004 00:20 (twenty-two years ago)

"Julio And The Giant Cherry".

― Casuistry (Chris P), Wednesday, 10 March 2004 01:02 (twenty-two years ago)

Imagine if you could see what the New Answers page looked like at any one time in history, and read threads with all posts after a certain date removed? That'd be pretty interesting.

ILX One Million, B.C.: furry mats, whips and growling tigers, oh my!

― Nichole Graham (Nichole Graham), Wednesday, 10 March 2004 01:27 (twenty-two years ago)

ILX One Million, B.C.: furry mats, whips and growling tigers, oh my!

Ladies and gentlemen, I think we have our porno flick.

― Andrew (enneff), Wednesday, 10 March 2004 01:50 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm definitely getting a "Ron Jeremy" vibe from ~~Ally~~gygax!.

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Wednesday, 10 March 2004 02:13 (twenty-two years ago)

you mean in an autofellatio sense?

― Nate in ST.P (natedetritus), Wednesday, 10 March 2004 05:56 (twenty-two years ago)

is gygax a hairy hedgehog?

― donut bitch (donut), Wednesday, 10 March 2004 05:57 (twenty-two years ago)

seven years pass...

i guess everyone was wrong here

― Oh, Monseur le Fapp, you are really oiling us... (Whiney G. Weingarten), Friday, 15 April 2011 16:07 (fifteen years ago)

well, who is it?

― homosexual II, Friday, 15 April 2011 16:33 (fifteen years ago)

i mean, it's that one dude

― homosexual II, Friday, 15 April 2011 16:44 (fifteen years ago)

oh, him

― 'what are you, the Hymen Protection League of America?' (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Friday, 15 April 2011 16:48 (fifteen years ago)

(winks broadly, nods in that dude's direction, raises eyebrows, waves hand loosely in hubba-hubba motion)

― Aimless, Friday, 15 April 2011 18:03 (fifteen years ago)

Wait, what? Fuck! Lorax went through with it?

― kkvgz, Friday, 15 April 2011 18:04 (fifteen years ago)

hahaha

― fat fat fat fat Usher (DJP), Friday, 15 April 2011 18:06 (fifteen years ago)

ugh! *quits watching pr0n*

― grill 'em bake 'em fry 'em burn 'em (snoball), Friday, 15 April 2011 18:12 (fifteen years ago)

hahaha

― crazy amounts of finger-licking (the table is the table), Friday, 15 April 2011 18:17 (fifteen years ago)

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