Lame ways of accidently making yourself lame

are you also one of those people who physically points the videogame controller in the direction you want to move in and sorta moves yr whole body in that direction as well while yelling various expletives at the tv screen? cuz i'm one of those people!

are you also one of those people who physically points the videogame controller in the direction you want the videogame character to move in and sorta moves yr whole body in that direction as well while yelling various expletives at the tv screen? cuz i'm one of those people!

I admit that was very stupuid. I am still angry when I think about it. Jumping off of bridges is not that big of a deal. When you know the depth of the water involved. I used to do this with the same friend when we were much younger. However, as I pointed out to him, the inlay of rocks in the river goes right to the middle. It is not very deep. He did it anyways. The whole thing was a nightmare. I was so drunk that I had to sit down and watch him. Others went down to help him but he was laughing about his knee. Eventually, the fire trucks, the ambulances and the police arrive. As I was the closet to the person in question I was made to deal with all their questions whilst being incredibly drunk. I had visited him in the hospital but was so angry with him that we did not really speak for awhile.

Of course when he got married and I went to the wedding - we were in his town and went to a waterfall. A very high waterfall. He scaled up the side of the waterfall and proceeded to walk along the very edges.

Some people are daredevils. I would think he was one. In high school he walked the ledge of the highest building in town. Some people never do learn.

However, I used to slide down the mill dam in town and almost broke my neck. I would have felt foolish then.

...lame ways of killing yourself...

...fired a crossbow through his own head, while the police surrounded the house thinking he had a hostage.

When I was five, we switched the porch door from a regular glass door to a sliding one -- and when I went to open the door to let the dog out the usual way (pretending to be Superman by holding one hand out in front of me and running at the door to push it open), I ran right through the damn thing and cut the shit out of my arm.

Do I get extra points for dislocating a shoulder while doing the same thing? (note: my shoulders dislocate quite easily and thus it was no real big deal other than I was sore for a day or so)

I am so shrunken from it that I’ll have to sit to pee for the rest of the day.

It was a memorable Paddys day.

Once in college I jumped off the second story of a parking garage into what I thought was a thick shrubbery but turned out to be half-dead ground cover. I think I broke my foot when I did that but I just limped around on it for a week and it went away.

I haven't really broken any other bones in my life. Like my father before me I end up injuring my hands about once a week. Since the laceration from the broken mirror (saturday night) has almost healed completely I'm probably due again. I should probably just cook something in a metal dish and get it over with.

The doctor looked at his back and checked his ribs and all that and he'd completely forgotten about his ankle until they were on the way out the door. The doc checked his ankle and found nothing much wrong with it. If they hadn't tried to use that damned crappy stretcher he'd have been fine after a couple of minutes. As it was it hurt to breathe for weeks.

(2) I broke my toe and my toenail while pacing furiously around the basement during a commercial break, during the first run of Twin Peaks. I was kind of wound up by it I guess.

My mom walked into a door a long time ago and broke her nose quite badly--in trying to diminish the swelling, the docs scooped some cartilege out. So she has this extraordinarily fragile nose, which she's broken 5 or 6 times since.

When I was 9 or so, I was just jumping up from my chair to go to school, not realizing that Mom was bending over to kiss me goodbye. My head hit her nose, and she was bleeding and crying and simultaneously shooing me off to catch my bus.

I'm the only one in my family with my original nose.

When I went back to school the following Monday, I refused to change into my gym clothes (I was embarrassed and I didn't want to have to explain the bite mark to anyone), but the teacher threatened to fail me if I didn't change. So I did; I changed into my shorts and short-sleeved t-shirt. Before I knew it I was being called in to see the principal and the social worker, who came to the conclusion that my parents were beating me, and called my house to make threats to my mother.

My parents were not amused. I was fucking mortified.

I got a fracture and three stitches out of it. The bridge of my nose still has an ugly bump and some scar tissue.

I think this was a pretty stupid way to get disfigured, really.

Oh, and I broke my nose on a deflating bouncy castle.

My little sister, on the other hand, bit half her bottom lip off climbing up a ladder to a slide and trying to skip a rung.

Oh, and I didn't know how to stop either when I started rollerblading. I was out in DC, blading just outside the White House, heading downhill (sound familiar?) towards major traffic on 15th St. The only things that could stop me would be a) throwing myself on the ground, b) swerving off to the grass on the side, or c) running into the Secret Service car parked in my path. So of course I went for the car. My new wrist guard left a black streak all the way down its side. The guy inside wasn't happy.

A friend was biking one day and got hit by a truck--or rather hit a truck. The truck was backing out of a driveway without looking. He couldn't stop and hit the side of the truck, flipped, hit his head on the windshield, and slid down the other side. His helmet was destroyed, and the driver of the truck was in hysterics (I'm sure having an indentation from a human head on yr windshield is rather disconcerting). My friend came out of it with nothing more than a chipped elbow. But he's the type to have all sorts of Wile E. Coyote kinda stories.

I had a rollerblading incident that reminds me of gabbneb's (big hill, unsure how to use brakes, drama ensuing)...but I only ended up considerably bruised and bloodied, no bones broken or anything.