Best headline of the week "Brawny replaces '70s porn guy' on packages"

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Product marketing marches on! From http://www.azcentral.com/business/articles/1229towelguy29-ON.html

When a lady spends 10, 20, 30 years with a man, she's bound to get tired of him. The bushy haircut she loved to tousle now looks like a John Denver parody. The mustache that was sexy starts to remind her of an undercover cop. The ruggedness that promised protection becomes too forced, too much like Arnold. She wants a man who's as comfortable in the kitchen as he is in the garage, a guy who's -- here it comes -- sensitive.

Which is why there's a new face on Brawny paper towels.

For the past two years, the folks at Georgia-Pacific Corp. have researched, focus-group-tested and debated the first significant change of the lumberjack look-alike in his 29 years.

Old Brawny Man was so out of date that some execs at Georgia-Pacific, which acquired the line in 2000, referred to him as "the '70s porn guy." He became "a man female shoppers wanted to break up with," said Gino Biondi, director of Georgia

― Elvis Telecom (Chris Barrus), Friday, 9 January 2004 22:03 (twenty-two years ago)

"Fantasize about me, Marge. Fantasize...about Brawny."

"MMmmm!"

― Kingfishee (Kingfish), Friday, 9 January 2004 22:06 (twenty-two years ago)

Don't forget about me, Marge.

― Leee Majors (Leee), Friday, 9 January 2004 22:08 (twenty-two years ago)

oh wait, i was wrong. it was "Burly Paper Towels."

http://www.actionfig.com/simpsons/burly1.jpg

― Kingfishee (Kingfish), Friday, 9 January 2004 22:49 (twenty-two years ago)

http://engrish.com/image/engrish/blendy1.jpg

― jed_ (jed), Friday, 9 January 2004 23:35 (twenty-two years ago)

But Brawny is blatantly ignoring the burly gay man market.

― donut bitch (donut), Friday, 9 January 2004 23:41 (twenty-two years ago)

I am going to miss the giant Brawny tractor trailer graphics.

― kephm, Saturday, 10 January 2004 00:20 (twenty-two years ago)

I already miss old Brawny guy.

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Saturday, 10 January 2004 00:40 (twenty-two years ago)

I remember back when old Brawny guy was still around. Those days were good.

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Saturday, 10 January 2004 00:40 (twenty-two years ago)

Hopefully they'll have enough sense to update the look to "21st century porn guy." I could post some pictures but I sense the C-man would get all angsty and shit.

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Saturday, 10 January 2004 00:48 (twenty-two years ago)

this is a problem how, exactly, Mike?

― M Matos (M Matos), Saturday, 10 January 2004 00:53 (twenty-two years ago)

xpost
yeah, those days are gone. you are right on that. i guess i am still living in the highway days of brawny past

― kephm, Saturday, 10 January 2004 00:58 (twenty-two years ago)

days of brawny past

wasn't that some sort of Xmen storyline, where they travel into the future to find that all mutantkind has been reduced to using crappy wood pulp?

― Kingfishee (Kingfish), Saturday, 10 January 2004 01:03 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.brawnyman.com/

He doesn't exactly look any less masculine and beefy than the previous guy.. just no beard. In fact, he looks more like CyberBrawny.

― donut bitch (donut), Saturday, 10 January 2004 04:29 (twenty-two years ago)

mmmm... "massively improved"...

― jody (Jody Beth Rosen), Saturday, 10 January 2004 04:38 (twenty-two years ago)

"Can you hear me brawn? Can you hear me brawn? Good."

― donut bitch (donut), Saturday, 10 January 2004 04:44 (twenty-two years ago)

So you're saying you want to be on paper towels packages, DB.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 10 January 2004 04:47 (twenty-two years ago)

Now he looks like "70's Televangelist Guy"

― Lord Custos Omicron (Lord Custos Omicron), Saturday, 10 January 2004 04:48 (twenty-two years ago)

Hmmm.... sure, why the fuck not? (to Ned)

― donut bitch (donut), Saturday, 10 January 2004 04:48 (twenty-two years ago)

http://nifty.nisusnet.com/nifty/gay/celebrity/burly-paper-towel-man

― anthony easton (anthony), Saturday, 10 January 2004 04:48 (twenty-two years ago)

Custos is onto something. He looks likes like the chunky steroided beefy man of God in that one Jack Chick tract! creepy.

― donut bitch (donut), Saturday, 10 January 2004 04:49 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh, and anthony, um, thank you.

― donut bitch (donut), Saturday, 10 January 2004 04:50 (twenty-two years ago)

BEHOLD THE GLORY OF REVEREND BRAWNYMAN....
http://www.brawnyman.com/images/gelHome01-bttm.jpg
He's a cross between Jr Bob Dobbs, Ronald Reagan and Clark Kent!

― Lord Custos Omicron (Lord Custos Omicron), Saturday, 10 January 2004 04:51 (twenty-two years ago)

and he's nowhere near as cool as any of them.
(I guess he needs a pipe, a cape and possibly a chimp to complete that ensemble.)

― Lord Custos Omicron (Lord Custos Omicron), Saturday, 10 January 2004 04:53 (twenty-two years ago)

Separated at birth?

http://www.brawnyman.com/images/gelHome01-bttm.jpg
http://www.simplifylife.com/images/06718910.gif

― Elvis Telecom (Chris Barrus), Saturday, 10 January 2004 05:01 (twenty-two years ago)

Or maybe I'm wrong. It's more a mix of

http://www.tvtome.com/images/people/19/9/49-19278-sm.jpg Jefferson D'arcy +
http://www.wm3.org/images/rollins.jpg Henry Rollins

― Lord Custos Omicron (Lord Custos Omicron), Saturday, 10 January 2004 05:03 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.nosfermina.com/rollins.jpg
"Fantasize about me, Marge. Fantasize...about, like, how INTENSE Brawny is."

― Lord Custos Omicron (Lord Custos Omicron), Saturday, 10 January 2004 05:06 (twenty-two years ago)

Brawny will hypnotize spills with his teeth

― nate detritus (natedetritus), Saturday, 10 January 2004 05:14 (twenty-two years ago)

His Teeeeeeth are also superabsorbent.
Because new Brawny(TM)(R)(C) is made out of the same stuff we make maxipads and tampons out of. Yep. Tear off a scrap the size of a postage stamp and it can soak up a whole gallon of milk. Hotdamn!

― Lord Custos Omicron (Lord Custos Omicron), Saturday, 10 January 2004 06:40 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.cnn.com/interactive/us/0210/offbeat.brawny.man/gallery.brawny.jpg

― weather!ngda1eson, Saturday, 10 January 2004 10:33 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.potlatch.net/hamm/SR5.jpg

― weather!ngda1eson, Saturday, 10 January 2004 12:25 (twenty-two years ago)

http://nifty.nisusnet.com/nifty/gay/celebrity/

― Eric H. (Eric H.), Saturday, 10 January 2004 15:53 (twenty-two years ago)

Whoa, Harley Race is oozing indie chick pheromones

― nate detritus (natedetritus), Saturday, 10 January 2004 16:39 (twenty-two years ago)

CANNED HAMM!

― donut bitch (donut), Saturday, 10 January 2004 18:21 (twenty-two years ago)

I don't like the new Brawny man one bit. He looks like the kind of guy who uses Neet to remove the hair around his asshole.

― may pang (maypang), Saturday, 10 January 2004 18:24 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.ifmagazine.com/images/17/17-100-756-0.gif

― Curt1s St3ph3ns, Saturday, 10 January 2004 18:43 (twenty-two years ago)

I don't like the new Brawny man one bit. He looks like the kind of guy who uses Neet to remove the hair around his asshole.
Well, thats is his next endorsement deal...

― Lord Custos Omicron (Lord Custos Omicron), Sunday, 11 January 2004 04:48 (twenty-two years ago)

"Neet = for the metrosexual not afraid of going all the way."

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 11 January 2004 05:55 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh, and that second picture up looks a lot like a certain shot in Cunningham's "Come to Daddy."

― Eric H. (Eric H.), Sunday, 11 January 2004 07:15 (twenty-two years ago)

what, michael jackson has a brand of paper towels now?

http://engrish.com/image/engrish/blendy1.jpg

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Sunday, 11 January 2004 11:54 (twenty-two years ago)

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