Australian Open 2004

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First Slam of the year and how excited are we? That's right, reasonably excited.

Roddick's first real post-Flushing examination (his #1 status thanks to his hardcourt summer of brilliance, and the happy accident of back-to-back Master Series scheduling in his purple patch, but I still maintain he's a cardboard cut-out next to Federer) - round one admirably negotiated, Steady Gonzalez out in three.

First shock - last year's runner-up Shousted by the adorable Bobbin, who has presumably ironed out the creases in his service action and transformed himself from cute physical knockabout comic to serious actor. Like Jerry Lewis. Rainy will now suffer a double-digit fall.

Elsewhere, Todd Martin was demonstrating that, when you've done as many tours of duty as he has, a two-set deficit to some freedom-hating snail-eater ain't nuttin to fret over. Next up, last June's prog darling - Karl-Ivo9 - winning in tie-breaks as ever ("Service breaks are for the decadent and feeble-minded." - Croatian Tennis Association handbook, 1995).

Gorgeous Gustie and van Lottum renewed their acquaintance (Vannie was en route to probable victory vs the Brazilian at Wimb when his body gave out) and it was a stormer - the triple Garrosian edging it 8-6 in the fifth.

So, Timbo to go beyond the last 16 in a non-London Slam for the first time? Feds to pick up his frightening end-2003 form?

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Monday, 19 January 2004 10:30 (twenty-two years ago)

so who are the dangerous opponents that could block Tim's route to the final?

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Monday, 19 January 2004 10:34 (twenty-two years ago)

Henman - seeded 11 after a little leap up the rankings after a semi appearance in Doha - faces Lisnard in round one (no problem). Then Sanguinetti/Stepanek (again, on this surface, surely not difficult). In the last 32, his first seeded opponent should be Calleri, but I suspect Canas will take that spot. Once again, on clay, TH is a goner, but not here. Last 16, it's probably Nalbandian: the perfect test of post-Paris Henny - if he can get by Bandy he's a genuine contender.

But then it's Hewitt or Federer in the quarters. Bye, bye, Timmy.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Monday, 19 January 2004 10:40 (twenty-two years ago)

I think if he gets hewitt he has a chance simply because there is a lot of pressure that comes with playing on home turf.

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Monday, 19 January 2004 10:46 (twenty-two years ago)

"Hi, is that Nerk Translation Services? I'd like to employ you to render Michael Jones's beautifully constructed but sadly inexplicable phrasings into words I can understand, please. You see, I'm rather excited about the tennis season and I don't want to miss out!

Yours etc.,
Mark C"

― Markelby (Mark C), Monday, 19 January 2004 10:55 (twenty-two years ago)

Gorgeous Gussie = Gustavo Kuerten.

The Adorable Bobbin: 19 year old Swede Robin Soderling, who showed by his Shuttle Scuttle that he wasn't soderling around.

In other results, my old mate Sexton Blake beat some bloke called Miranda (fortunately that's his family name), who desperately needs a nickname but I can't think of one.

My other old mate Eunice Alan Hughie (who lost to Roddick 19-17 in the fifth at 1.30 am in the quarters last year, softening up the Big A for Schuttler's armchair ride to last year's final) made a 5 game fly-in limp=off contribution to 2004, retiring and conceding his match to a Spaniard called Galo Blanco (= The Great White Wind? OK I'm guessing.)

I've just seen local Oz fave Nicole Pratt prove she's anything but well named by tipping out 12th seed Meghan Shaunnassy of the US, who moved in quickly to fill the 'appalling tennis fashion' hole made by the absence of half the usual contingent of Williamses.

Agassi and 'legendary Australian' (acc to the Channel 7 teaser) Todd Larkham have just started. The LA in 5-1 down after 18 minutes, but has already won half as many games as he did against the slightly better known Australian Lleyton Hewitt in his 2003 campaign.

More tomorrow.

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Monday, 19 January 2004 11:35 (twenty-two years ago)

what barry said.

perhaps a start of season glossary would be useful and then you can expand from there jonesy?

so who are the dangerous opponents that could block Tim's route to the final?

his serve, his attitude, his not being terribly good etcetcetc, oh my sides...

― CarsmileSteve (CarsmileSteve), Monday, 19 January 2004 11:41 (twenty-two years ago)

he has shown some good form late last year.

― Julio Desouza (jdesouza), Monday, 19 January 2004 11:49 (twenty-two years ago)

I saw this! It was the most ludicrous thing I'd ever seen, JVL en route to probable victory AGAIN, but his body gave out AGAIN - from 2-2 in the fifth he was completely wracked with cramps and kept falling over after every two points. That Lotto actually went up 5-4 indicates how awful Guga was (double faults everywhere, no attampt to make a cramping opponent run, mishit backhands).

Elsewhere, the Red Army has suffered some losses, but it's barely made a dent in their numbers - Elena Dementieva (from Russia without serve) got creamed by Jelena "Weird Al" Jankovic and blamed it on Christmas, while Nadia Petrova (suffering a buttock injury, by all accounts) got sent packing by Aniko Kapros, whose parents used to be in a circus. But they still have the Bovine One, the Kooz and Zvonareva, who I can't think of a nickname for.

And Daniela Hantuchova has managed to win her first match since... ooh, September or October. Too bad she'll be facing Molik next.

So, Timbo to go beyond the last 16 in a non-London Slam for the first time? Feds to pick up his frightening end-2003 form?

Neither... FedEx is coachless and scatterbrained, and if someone else doesn't get him first Hewitt will take him out. Unfortunately. And Chicken-legs won't get past Nalbandiandiandian.

AGH I've just realised the horrifying possibility of a Roddick v Hewitt final, AGH. That'd be the worst thing ever.

― The Lex (The Lex), Monday, 19 January 2004 12:03 (twenty-two years ago)

No posts from Dan yet? I worry.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 19 January 2004 17:35 (twenty-two years ago)

Haven't you heard, Ned? No Serena. Venus has the gutsy Harkleroad in round one, which may or not be a test of how much she can be bothered with this nonsense any more.

Potential Myskina-Rubin last 16 showdown. Can't they both go through?

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Monday, 19 January 2004 18:06 (twenty-two years ago)

Myskina v Sharapova in round 3, too :(

The best thing about the whole lark thus far has been "House Of Jealous Lovers" being the theme tune on Eurosport! It's wonderful to hear that riff every changeover.

― The Lex (The Lex), Monday, 19 January 2004 19:31 (twenty-two years ago)

FedEx is coachless and scatterbrained

I should pay more attention to the tennis news (I think it's after the shipping forecast); actually, I did hear something about packing Lund the Rotund in but what's this scatterbrained business all about?

He was in such terrifying form in Houston, that he seemed to have reached some higher mental state. End-of-season form no guide to the Oz Open, of course - look at Becker in '92/'93. Ha ha ha ha.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Monday, 19 January 2004 21:21 (twenty-two years ago)

BUTTOCK INJURY!!!!!!!!!!!!

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 19 January 2004 21:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Yeah. Turned out to be a real pain in the arse. Oh god, that sentence was the nadir of the thread.

Fed's form this season = patchy, scrappy win over Johansson and straight-set loss to Agassi, never looking remotely like the player who won Houston (and yes, Lund was sacked post-Houston). Also his record against Llittle Lleyton and Big Dave is woeful.

― The Lex (The Lex), Monday, 19 January 2004 21:44 (twenty-two years ago)

Sorry, I didn't think Rog had played competitively this season (where was it?) and I figured he'd laid the Bandy demon to rest in Houston by throttling the poor sod by a million points to nil.

I expect Tag to pop up any minute and proclaim RF the Manchester City of tennis, such is his mercurial nature. Or was that Goran?

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Monday, 19 January 2004 21:55 (twenty-two years ago)

Kooyong exhibition... won by the Nalb, who beat Roddick and Agassi back to back. I'm not convinced Federer's laid any demons to rest, certainly players like Nalbandian and Hewitt will fare best against him if he's off in any case. Also he looks LOST without a coach, I can't imagine such a complex game working without guidance.

Still... mercurial, he's got nothin' on Safin.

VW or J double H?

― The Lex (The Lex), Monday, 19 January 2004 22:15 (twenty-two years ago)

It was Goran. That's why I love him.

― Tag (Tag), Tuesday, 20 January 2004 09:09 (twenty-two years ago)

Stoopidly easy for Ferry, Lleyts, Feddy and Bandy but Coria is on the skids and other seeds to fall: Cap'n Verkerk, MaxMi, Lopezzz, Mantilla and Bjorkman; Kerk & Jork had tough opponents but the manner of Jonas' defeat was a bit alarming.

Henman currently coasting: 6-2 plus a break in the second vs Liskeard. PolyPhilla is up later.

In answer to the question, VW or JHH, it's Sunshine Band time (she's 6-3 4-1 vs Weingy).

I may have to start getting to work earlier so I can monitor the last dregs of the daytime schedule, rather than just the night matches.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Tuesday, 20 January 2004 09:31 (twenty-two years ago)

Roideski is Tulla-bound (in case anybody still cares) but it seems the Henperson is thru.

The Big Ouzo and ex-champ Tommy Jo Hanson on serve in first set 4-3, the local lad having to work slightly harder to keep it that way. The Clidge thru with very little hassle.

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Tuesday, 20 January 2004 10:23 (twenty-two years ago)

Tommy Jo holds serve at 6-5 and we're in a tiebreaker.

TJ has first point and two serves to come.

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Tuesday, 20 January 2004 10:40 (twenty-two years ago)

....from which the Bog Ouzo recovers to take the tie-breaker 7-5 and follows up by eating the second set 6-2. Tommy Jo's tennis is looking nearly as wooden as his facial expression.

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Tuesday, 20 January 2004 11:23 (twenty-two years ago)

Darn it, Flip Poo Sis through in straights. All women's seeds through except for Cowchita Mootinez, who fell to Puerto Rico's very own Kristina Brandi Butter.

I take all my FedEx scepticism back after watching him school some American kid last night - he was magnificent.

La Clidge would've been my pick a couple of weeks ago but I don't trust that bum ankle - I think she's being incredibly stupid even trying to play on something she admits will require surgery. I wouldn't be surprised if she fell to whoever comes out of the Myskina/Sharapova/Rubin quarter (today - Rubin looked very shaky, Myskina looked semi-shaky and Shaz looked awesome as ever).

― The Lex (The Lex), Tuesday, 20 January 2004 13:24 (twenty-two years ago)

Surprised you weren't able to make some play out of 'Remy' Martinez playing Brandi.

Tommy Jo actually allowed himself to become 'almost' animated right at the end when it was too late. It was a good solid performance by the Big Ouzo, and he could go a long way. It would be handy for both Lleyt the Llout and MP to have the other still around a while, and I wouldn't be surprised at all if the seeds turn out OTM and Mark stays in the hunt longer.

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Tuesday, 20 January 2004 13:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Surprised you weren't able to make some play out of 'Remy' Martinez playing Brandi.

Goddamnit, you're right. See, falling back on old nicknames = dud, I've been calling her Mootinez for nearly a decade now.

The draw's certainly opened up for MP now that Wee Willie Coria is gone - a semi-final is well within reach, though negotiating Ancic and Ferrero Rocher could be tricky. The Llout has the Draw From Hell - but I suspect he may be best equipped to survive it...

Oh dear. It's highly probable that Roddick, Hewitt and Philippoussis are 3 of the 4 semifinalists. They happen to be my 3 least favourite players. This may not prove to be such fun.

― The Lex (The Lex), Tuesday, 20 January 2004 13:55 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh, no -- I think I'm going to have to... *read* this thread.

― the roonfox, Tuesday, 20 January 2004 21:52 (twenty-two years ago)

Not much to get the citrus flowing on day three - only the fall of ADF-loving Maggie Maleeva. Rodders and Ags will surely be more sternly examined in round three by Steradent and NQuest; another shatterproof match from Ivy, but all the breakers rolled over him this time: ToddAO through in three to face SjengALeng. Blakey's looking good for a run to the quarters.

Bovine lolloped out to Lux Interior and Citizen Smith had a few wobbles (perhaps more vs Open All Hours next round - if Granville can stay on her bike?), but the women's went mostly to plan. Oh, hang on, Dannii's out.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Wednesday, 21 January 2004 11:32 (twenty-two years ago)

Bottom seed Robbie Ginepri (name too big a mess to do anything with) has just sent local youngster Chris GucciGucciGoone home on the Essendon tram 6-4 6-3 6-3, which looks a whole lot closer than it was. Earlier today, Nicole Pratt once again came from a set down to win against a very promising-looking Japanese girl whose name sounded very much like Origami. Another Ausette, Alicia Molik, made very short work of Daniela Hantuchova.

(With the regrettable absence of Anna the Hologram from this year's festivities, the Pole from Russia did her job and possibly even hung around longer than contracted.)

(Who's Open All Hours?)

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Wednesday, 21 January 2004 11:49 (twenty-two years ago)

(I gave her real name in the same sentence, Fred. I now regret extending the sitcom gag with a tag which could sound like rugby club innuendo. I'm sure Laura's a lovely girl with impeccably high standards.)

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Wednesday, 21 January 2004 11:53 (twenty-two years ago)

the women's went mostly to plan. Oh, hang on, Dannii's out.

It's all part of the plan!

The Prattster, as they are wont to call her in Melbourne, beat Morigami, who I remember giving Capriati a rough ride at Wimbledon... I call her Mpaperfolding.

Hungary will now officially reprazent in the last 16 as the Other Kapster takes on the gorgeous Petra Mandula in round 3 - the winner, I suspect, will progress to the quarter-final.

More inane bullshit from Eurosport commentators about early round blow-outs on the women's side and the lack of depth in their field. Given how often they're talked about over and above the women, I'm surprised they missed the Ferrero, Roddick, Agassi, Hewitt, Nalbandian and Federer blow-outs, which were as one-sided as anything Venus Williams or Justine H-H has ever dealt out.

― The Lex (The Lex), Wednesday, 21 January 2004 12:02 (twenty-two years ago)

Next round fantasy result: Aging but hardworking hack Todd Martin bumps off sulky git Marat Safin who I'm currently watching (in delay) beat Finn Jarkko Niemenen in 4. Suffice to say he's finding Nemo very hard work ATM.

(Although Sexton Blake in the fourth round would probably do a better job than the Todster if the s.g. survives that match, provided the Inspector can get past the virtuous M. Olivier Patience, whose name alone makes me want a look at him.)

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Wednesday, 21 January 2004 12:20 (twenty-two years ago)

Question for the floor: What news is there of Tommy Haas?

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Wednesday, 21 January 2004 12:22 (twenty-two years ago)

There's a British player called Timothy Patient (does that mean he is the embodiment of what Olivier aspires to, or is he limited by this single defining feature, whereas Ollie can dip into his reserves any time he likes?). Whatever, I suspect a match between TP and OP wouldn't see a lot of risky winners.

There's also a British player called Amadeus Fulford-Jones. Christ, and we wonder why we're lacking serious contenders behind Henman.

About Haas, I know naas.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Wednesday, 21 January 2004 12:35 (twenty-two years ago)

Doesn't take long to work out why the English Patient (sorry, there's no other way to phrase it) may insist on 'Timothy' instead of its usual abbreviation.

He may figure that's the best of a bad lot. 'Timothy Patient' makes him sound like the court jester in a bad imitation of a bad Shakespeare comedy.

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Wednesday, 21 January 2004 12:40 (twenty-two years ago)

Another of our 'best' British juniors is named Emily Webley-Smith. I wonder if she's ever teamed up with Mr Fulford-Jones.

Haas still hasn't recovered from the shoulder injury he sustained approximately a decade ago... he hasn't played in over 12 months, that I know.

I hope Marat Safin wins this thing, he's by far the best-looking male player around.

― The Lex (The Lex), Wednesday, 21 January 2004 12:44 (twenty-two years ago)

Thanks Lex.

I'm no expert (there! a confession) but your comment re Safin may fall into the 'sad but true' basket.

Neither the Llout nor the Fed would, I imagine, be many peoples' concept of an oil painting, and there seems to be general consensus that the Bodyshop Boy's eyes are too close together.

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Wednesday, 21 January 2004 12:58 (twenty-two years ago)

True too of Feds, surely? But then, as Jerry pointed out on an ancient Wimbledon thread, this is a sign of a True Great (cf. Borg). Except in the case of JHH, who is the opposite extreme, like a purty dolphin.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Wednesday, 21 January 2004 13:01 (twenty-two years ago)

Fed's nose and chin boggle my mind... huge. Like Graf, though... maybe another sign. Like they've been marked by God or something. As for the Llout - he looks like the Clidge, and the less said about their collective ability to not get hearts racing the better.

Ferrero is the only one who comes close to the Safin Studness!

JHH used to look just like a very cute elf. Now she looks like a scary mutant crazy buff elf.

Nicole Pratt looks like an extra from Prisoner Cell Block H, I certainly wouldn't mess with her. My Australian sources inform me that all their tennis women are raging dykes except for Molik, who is their current collective target.

― The Lex (The Lex), Wednesday, 21 January 2004 13:08 (twenty-two years ago)

This is where my two-tournaments-a-year-or-three-if-Oz-are-still-in-the-Davis-Cup-come-Wimbers bluff as a tennis 'expert' gets shown up. Because you hardly ever get to see an Ausette past about the first Thursday, I can barely tell one from another.

But you may like to guess where most hits to Anna the Hologram's web site per head of population come from (Clue: Aussie Aussie Aussie Oi Oi Oi!), while you are deciding how much cred to give to the views of 'your Australian sources'.

Also consider that some extremely ugly men have represented Ourlandgirtbysea at tennis (look at Wayne Arthurs, Andrew Ilie, Richard Fromberg as well as the aforementioned Llout).

Agree that Nicole Pratt's ability to inspire relates totally to her mental strength. But the mature Evonne Cawley was, and is still at age 50+, stunning. Nicole Provis Bradtke also had her admirers.

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Wednesday, 21 January 2004 13:30 (twenty-two years ago)

Oh, Australian women tennis players are MUCH better looking than the men... I do trust my sources, they're the type of people who attend each day of the Australian Open qualifiers, and report back with all the gossip (apparently two of the lower-ranked girls nearly got into a fist-fight after one called the other a slut in Italian, and the other smashed a ball into her opponent's support camp - oh the drama).

Agreed on Pratt's mental strength, she seems to win matches on willpower alone.

― The Lex (The Lex), Wednesday, 21 January 2004 13:49 (twenty-two years ago)

Nicole Pratt is great, but of course I'm still gonna support Venus all the way. I haven't seen Justine yet this season; does she look like mini-Capriati from the neck down now???

― Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 21 January 2004 14:41 (twenty-two years ago)

does she look like mini-Capriati from the neck down now???

She looks like Claudia Kodhe-Kilsch from the wrists out and Francoise Durr from the eyelashes in. Maybe.

Now, La Goolagong made Safin look like Ivan Lendl, did she not? I'll always remember my Dad picking her as Wimb champ in '80, and (even at 12) thinking this was sentimental nonsense but I better politely go along with it to humour him. Good old Dad.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Wednesday, 21 January 2004 14:56 (twenty-two years ago)

does she look like mini-Capriati from the neck down now???

There were some weird reports floating around a week ago that Capriati had pulled out of Melbourne because she'd gained 25kg. It's never stopped her in the past, she's always had a bit of a beer belly. Mauresmo is looking buff 4eva at the moment too.

Obviously I support my Russians above all others, but I'll be genuinely torn if the expected Venus/Justine final materialises - they're the only realistic Slam contenders (sorry, Anastasia - love you but you're not there yet) I have any time for, and I want them to win for very different reasons. Hopefully Myskina or Sharapova can tear up the draw and spare me the dilemma.

― The Lex (The Lex), Wednesday, 21 January 2004 20:27 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.australianopen.com/images/pics/large/b_molik_2101.jpg

― wtf?????, Wednesday, 21 January 2004 21:46 (twenty-two years ago)

'Art'.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Wednesday, 21 January 2004 22:20 (twenty-two years ago)

That was the Meghann Shaugnessey number I referred to upthread.

No Serena, you do NOT need to try and top it.

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Wednesday, 21 January 2004 22:28 (twenty-two years ago)

i don't know about your monitor but on mine that picture looks like she's wearing the world's craziest corset!!! parody of an hourglass figure

(if you turn the brightness up the background shifts to green but it otherwise reads as black on my monitor anyway)

― wtf, Wednesday, 21 January 2004 22:34 (twenty-two years ago)

ps i think wayne arthurs is ruggedly handsome but i know i'm weird

― wtf, Wednesday, 21 January 2004 22:36 (twenty-two years ago)

Back to gloat in greater detail later but for now - well done to the Llout for eventually thrashing Kucera, and to Todd 'Chopper' Reid for his meritorious win over Sarkis Sarkasm, a crook ankle and a flu bug.

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Thursday, 22 January 2004 07:25 (twenty-two years ago)

Can Reidy evade the Feds? Rog an easy winner over Charlie Pasarell's forgotten son. David still charging through to the inevitable Brit-Arg cruncher in the sixteens with gay Nalbandon; I doubt Sanchez or Wizened Wayne can stop him. Nice to see Timbo finish a tricky match with such uncharacteristic firmness.

Elsewhere, Arfurs outlasted by the indomitable Costa (play Wimbledon one year, why dontcha?) despite 39 aces. 2002's boy wonder Ancic lurks in round three for the winner of Santoro-Philp, and right now Mark P is on the verge of levelling it at one set all. I hope this is a long one, we haven't had a running commentary sesh on this thread yet.

The women's last 32 looks very tasty - I'm pulling for Jill Craybas, mostly cos her name reminds me of some exotic Louisiana dish, when in fact she's a Rhode Island girl. They're big on seafood too, I expect.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Thursday, 22 January 2004 10:13 (twenty-two years ago)

Skipping 107 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

Aargh - I'd forgotten about this give-one-of-the-mens-finalists-an-extra-nights-sleep insanity of the non-grass Slams. So, Safin-Agassi is happening NOW and I'm still at home with possibly the worst morning commute of the year ahead of me. It may well be all over the next time I check in. Right now: on serve, 3-3 in the first.

I'm not sure I can stay up for Leffe-Westvleteren Saturday morning; it's the third final in four between the two and only worth a long-play tape.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Thursday, 29 January 2004 09:09 (twenty-two years ago)

Also, I can't believe, even in a four-hander-lovin' nation like Oz, that Friday's daytime programme on RLA will be exclusively devoted to doubles. Which means we can expect Fed-Fer to take to court around 2am GMT. Damn the rotation of the earth and the break up of Pangaea!

(Saffy serving at 4-5, first set. Off into the arctic wastes of SE London...)

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Thursday, 29 January 2004 09:19 (twenty-two years ago)

TB in the 1st, the Agmeister slightly ahead.

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Thursday, 29 January 2004 09:33 (twenty-two years ago)

Safin claims the tiebreaker 8-6 with an ace, then serves first in the second set to love. Is the Agster starting to wobble?

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Thursday, 29 January 2004 09:46 (twenty-two years ago)

Nice to see you too, Nerk, but can you please translate all the names?
This is worse than trying to read Hat.

― tailender (tailender), Thursday, 29 January 2004 10:30 (twenty-two years ago)

Agatha broke early in the 2nd but failed to serve it out and Marais repeated his first-set eight-sixer; will Andre be denied his 15th GS final?

(Getting to work was easy - aside from the slip-slide slalom down Gipsy Hill to the station).

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Thursday, 29 January 2004 10:55 (twenty-two years ago)

From memory:

Sexton Blake - James Blake
Forrest Gump - Todd Martin
Body Shop Boy/Kid - Andy Roddick
Clidge - Kim Clijsters
Eunice Alan Hughie - Younis El-Ayanoui
Romy - Patty Schnieder
Princess Anastasia/Mosquito - Anastasia Myskina
FedEx - Roger Federer
JCF - Juan Carlos Ferrero
Nailbags - David Nalbandian
Big Ouzo/Flip - Mark Phillipoussis
Marrakesh Express - Hichem Arazi
Dave/Big Dave/Citizen Smith - Lindsay Davenport
Tommy Jo Hanson - Thomas Johanssen
Anna the Hologram - Anna Kournikova
Yevvers - Yevgeny Kafelnikov
Chopper - Todd Reid

Ask about the others as needed.

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Thursday, 29 January 2004 11:06 (twenty-two years ago)

Wow, a million hours of editing later and I appear to have missed nothing of interest. Wasn't the Clidge supposed to be on the verge of pulling out? And when can we have a non-Belgian, non-Williams in the final? Or at least a vaguely interesting combination of them.

Debating whether to get on with work or watch the Saf-Ags final set... I fear that Safin may have run out of steam, unless that fourth set was a tank job. Should have finished it off in the third, goddamnit.

(I am nearly over the Anastasia defeat. Nearly, but not quite.)

― The Lex (The Lex), Thursday, 29 January 2004 12:04 (twenty-two years ago)

Bloody norah, I spend an hour in an encoding seminar and Dr Dre comes storming back. BBC suggests that Fina got so miffed at a bad call as AA served at 3-1 that he threw the remainder of the set, so his legs still seem to have some running juice in them.

And Marat has a break point in the fifth! Which he takes! Flippin' 'eck! Serving at 3-1!

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Thursday, 29 January 2004 12:12 (twenty-two years ago)

This game has been an absolute epic. Andre is the one hanging on for dear life right now.

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Thursday, 29 January 2004 12:21 (twenty-two years ago)

Saf serving for the match.

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Thursday, 29 January 2004 12:28 (twenty-two years ago)

What a heroic effort from the Big Fella - 7-6 7-6 5-7 1-6 6-3 in 3hr42. My main fear now is that he'll be spent vs Fedz or Ferz. But, he does get that extra day off. Clever scheduling, Australian Tennis Folks!

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Thursday, 29 January 2004 12:32 (twenty-two years ago)

I made the right decision to watch that, then :)

Safin's been quite something this tournament... to have come back from nearly a year out and beat Martin, Roddick and Agassi all in gruelling five-setters. I'd predict that he'd be too tired to win the final were it not for the fact that I thought he'd lose today - and certainly the extra day off helps.

(also - the women have been comprehensively outshone)

― The Lex (The Lex), Thursday, 29 January 2004 12:35 (twenty-two years ago)

...and winning it to love, one fault, one other address of the ball.

Agassi leaves. Bud Collins wonders aloud whether he will be back.

Marat is shagged on his feet but still has top do the McEnroe thing. Roger F might sometimes exaggerate the dodgy English, but with Marat it's no act and he really is struggling.

(Xpost back to my last)

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Thursday, 29 January 2004 12:37 (twenty-two years ago)

"shagged on his feet", oh if only!

We never get to see the J-Mac interviews. Eurosport censors it and cuts away just before they start talking.

Looking back over the women's semis... I see that Batty Patty pulled an Anastasia and choked a second set lead away. I really hope Justine wins the final. Trivia of the day: she becomes just the fourth active woman to have reached all four Slam finals (after the Williams sisters and Seles).

― The Lex (The Lex), Thursday, 29 January 2004 12:41 (twenty-two years ago)

The Clij
The Clij?!? Suits her look. hah. SHe might need another operation after the Australian Open.

― nathalie (nathalie), Thursday, 29 January 2004 12:45 (twenty-two years ago)

Right. This is as close to comprehensive as I can be arsed doing... reread the whole thread and cut and paste the following into Word or whatever, then search for the name you don't understand. Thus, we win, or something.

THE COMPLETE ILX TENNIS THREAD DEMISTIFIER, SORT OF

Rainy/Shousted - Rainer Schuettler
Bobbin - Robin Soderling
Karl-Ivo9/Ivy - Ivo Karlovic
Gorgeous Gustie/the triple Garrosian - Gustavo Kuerten
van Lottum/Vannie/JVL - John Van Lottum
Timbo/Henny/the Henperson - Tim Henman
Bandy/Nalbandiandiandian/Big Dave (in context of men's tournament)/the Nalb/Nailbags - David Nalbandian
the Bovine One/Bovine - Elena Bovina
the Kooz/Da Kooz/Kuzzy - Svetlana Kuznetsova
FedEx/Fed/Feddy/Rog/Feds/Rodge/Radio Frequency - Roger Federer
Chicken-legs - unsure, poss. Lleyton Hewitt
VW/Willie/The Queen Vee - Venus Williams
J double H/JHH/Hards/La Juste/H squared/Jorjeous Jussie/The Pencil/The Hand - Justine Henin Hardenne
Ferry/Ferrero Rocher/JCF/'No Not Wayne This Bloke's Spanish'/NNWTBS - Juan Carlos Ferrero
Lleyts/Lleyt the Llout/The Llout/Chewitt/Hewey/Hewi/Low Hum - Lleyton Hewitt
Cap'n Verkerk - Martin Verkerk
MaxMi - Max Mirnyi
Lopezzz - Feliciano Lopez
PolyPhilla/the Dinosaur - unsure, poss. Mark Phillipoussis
Roideski - Greg Rusedski
The Big Ouzo/Flip Poo Sis/MP/Philp/Mark P/Sissy/The Scud/Flip/Poopsis/Lippo - Mark Phillipoussis
Tommy Jo Hanson/Tommy Jo/TJ - Thomas Johansson
The Clidge/La Clidge/The Lleytonette/Clij - Kim Clijsters
Cowchita Mootinez/'Remy' Martinez - Conchita Martinez
Kristina Brandi Butter - Kristina Brandi
Shaz/Shari/Shara/The Queen Of Scream/the Shar of I-Ran-Down-Everything - Maria Sharapova
Wee Willie Coria - Guillermo Coria
Rodders/the Bodyshop Boy/the Dickhead/Rodd/Pandy/Anita - Andy Roddick
Ags/AntiAlias/AA/Andre3000/The Agmeister/The Agster/Agatha/Dr Dre - Andre Agassi
NQuest/Tom N. Quist/Tomas E - Thomas Enqvist
Steradent - unsure, poss. Paradorn Srichaphan
ToddAO/the Todster/Unibrow/Old Todd/Forrest Gump/Toddality - Todd Martin
SjengALeng/Sjenga - Sjeng Schalken
Blakey/Sexton Blake/The Inspector - James Blake
Lux Interior/Clouds/Cloudine - Claudine Schaul
Citizen Smith/Big Davey/Dave/Big Dave/Linz - Lindsay Davenport
Open All Hours - Laura Granville
Dannii - prob. Eleni Daniilidou, unsure
Chris GucciGucciGoone - Chris Guccione
Origami/Mpaperfolding - Akiko Morigami
Anna the Hologram - Anna Kournikova
the Pole from Russia - could be anyone of a number of Russian women, probably either Sharapova or Anastasia Myskina
The Prattster/Nicole P - Nicole Pratt
Other Kapster/the Kapster - Aniko Kapros
Nemo - Jarkko Nieminen
Ourlandgirtbysea - Australia
Sarkis Sarkasm - Sargis Sargsian
Reidy/Beryl Reid/Chopper Reid/Tod Reidstader - Todd Reid
Charlie Pasarell's forgotten son - Jeff Morrison
Wizened Wayne/Ferrari/WF/Waning Wayne - Wayne Ferreira
Arfurs - Wayne Arthurs
the Fabrication/Faberge/Suntory/Santoro!toro!toro!/Fab - Fabrice Santoro
Sancheez - David Sanchez
Armarmda Coetzer - Amanda Coetzer
Saint Patrick/Raft - Pat Rafter
Billy Canine - Guillermo Canas
Nads - Rafael Nadal
Super Mario - Mario Ancic
La Smash-Pistol - Anna Smashnova-Pistolesi
Aiiii "Booyakasha!" Sugiyama - Ai Sugiyama
Sweet'n'Saori Obata - Saori Obata
Princess Anastasia/MySki/Myska/Annie/My Skin A/Anasty/Ana the Musk/Stasia/the Princess/the Mosquito - Anastasia Myskina
Petra M - Petra Mandula
Fabiola Z/Fabulous Fabiola/Fabiola Zellweger - Fabiola Zuluaga
Dentyne/Taylor Made/Tails - Taylor Dent
Saffy/Safinity/Jean Paul/Maratski/Marry/MS/Ratso/Marais/The Big Feller/Fina - Marat Safin
Crayon Girl - prob. Jill Craybas
Molli/Our Leese/Ali - Alicia Molik
'Big John'/OS-Jean - Sebastien Grosjean
Ollie La Virtue - Olivier Patience
Yevvers/Kaffee/Kalashnikov/Special K/the Kafmeister - Yevgeny Kafelnikov
Raymond Baxter/Rain Man/Lisa R/Raymond Scott/Liiiisa/Ray du Monde/Venus's conqueror - Lisa Raymond
Frazier Crane/Smokin' Joe - Amy Frazier
Princess Far I/Kazan - Silvia Farina Elia
Rick Rubin/Ruddy Rubin/Moet et Chandon - Chanda Rubin
Discount Booze - Elena Likhovtseva
Dishy Dechy - Natalie Dechy
Lina K - Lina Krasnoroutskaya
Gavel - Andrei Pavel
NoVac - Jiri Novak
Pattycakes/Romy Schneider/Batty Patty - Patty Schnyder
Hitch 'Em High Arazi/Champazi/The Marrakesh Express/Razor Razi - Hicham Arazi
Amelie Moretestosterone - Amelie Mauresmo
VZ/Duckworth - Vera Zvonereva
Last Qualifier Standing/Louise Santangeli/The Saint Angel - Mara Santangelo
Safety - prob. Marat Safin, poss. not
Avon - poss. James Blake, no idea
Coq-au-vin/La fille francoise - Tatiana Golovin
Llanwrst-Ffedereriog - Lleyton Hewitt vs. Roger Federer
Eunice Alan Hughie - Younis El Aynaoui
Leffe-Westvleteren - Justine Henin-Hardenne vs. Kim Clijsters

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Thursday, 29 January 2004 12:57 (twenty-two years ago)

Took roughly one and a half hours, in case anyone's wondering.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Thursday, 29 January 2004 12:58 (twenty-two years ago)

That's one of the most impressive pieces of work ever William! I started, and failed to get past the first three posts.

Clearing up some loose ends -

Chicken-legs = Tim Henman
The Dinosaur = Andre Agassi
Steradent = Taylor Dent
Dannii = Daniela Hantuchova (though I'm sure it'll be used for Daniilidou at some point too)

― The Lex (The Lex), Thursday, 29 January 2004 13:06 (twenty-two years ago)

Thanks for a marathon effort WBS. NOt surprised it took 1 + 1/2 hours.

Steradent - Taylor Dent
The Pole From Russia - Danila Hantuchova
Crayon Girl is right
Avon - no idea. I might have to go back thru the results and work it out.

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Thursday, 29 January 2004 13:11 (twenty-two years ago)

Avon might be James Blake.

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Thursday, 29 January 2004 13:38 (twenty-two years ago)

Yeah, Avon, Blake's Seven, y'know.

WBS is the missing link between Harvey Keitel's Cleaner and Keft Shamblin, the compulsive glossarian-hero in JN Nepotion's novel A Week Of Sour Porridge.

So, g'bye to St Andris of Agsisi, the boy who only recovered from the shock of Santa's non-existence when his folks told him (at age 24) of a strange faraway land called Oz, where a mythical fourth Grand Slam is played - under a roof if it rains. "Late, but in earnest" - maybe he's a Kerr way back.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Thursday, 29 January 2004 13:55 (twenty-two years ago)

Jonesy, you owe Will a pint for that. As do I.

― Markelby (Mark C), Thursday, 29 January 2004 14:13 (twenty-two years ago)

You only say that because you know I don't drink pints...

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Thursday, 29 January 2004 14:19 (twenty-two years ago)

I didn't say a pint of what. And I didn't say it was for drinking.

― Markelby (Mark C), Thursday, 29 January 2004 14:34 (twenty-two years ago)

Balancing?

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Thursday, 29 January 2004 14:37 (twenty-two years ago)

Sorry, Barry, if I didn't seem grateful to the Wyge - I was tipping my hat to him in the only way I know how: by talking bollocks. But, yes, the Bicardi Breezers are on me! (Jingle)

Good news for those of us near the Greenwich meridian - it all kicks off at 4am GMT tomorrow in Rockhampton Rocket's Realm with the women's doubles final (P'ual/S'rez-Kuz/Lik), followed by Erlich/Huber*-Paes/Navratilova in a mixed semi and THEN There Can Be Only Juan vs Mount Federest. So, it's almost like a night match, with point-by-point followability for the commuter crowd.

(* - not Anke, Tag. Do calm yourself.)

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Thursday, 29 January 2004 18:10 (twenty-two years ago)

Bloody hell, we were off the new answers page there for a bit. Is there something else going on in the world other than the Australian Open?

Gerfed is streaking away from Geraldine in his usual greased-track rocket-sled manner: first two sets, 6-4 6-1. The coronation should happen in half an hour at this rate.

In the mixed, Marty N is in the running for her five-kabillionth title, easing into a final vs Bovril/Nenad (but what happened to her and Baxter in the women's? Love and three in some early round?). Virgi'n'Paolz nabbed the WD title, squashing the SovaSeva threat.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Friday, 30 January 2004 09:54 (twenty-two years ago)

That's it - it's a Rogmar final. Phat Pheddy won 4, 1 & 4 in 89mins.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Friday, 30 January 2004 10:19 (twenty-two years ago)

The Rogering of JCF is complete. Rodge v Marat in a final with vibes very much like Pat v Goran at Wimbers a few years ago.

Safin hasn't a hope in Hades of course. Just like he wasn't a prayer against Roddick. Or Agassi. Just like if he somehow snuck past Martin, Inspector Blake would then put him on the bus.

Just like the Croat....

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Friday, 30 January 2004 10:32 (twenty-two years ago)

Credit where due: This year not many major howlers have been committed so far by those unintentional comedians with the Press passes.

But one ABC talking head chose an most unfortunate time (in these days of rumors of high-level corruption in sport) to pronounce the first name of one of the WD winners as 'Payola', not once but twice in separate statements.

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Friday, 30 January 2004 10:46 (twenty-two years ago)

haha clearly no one cares enough about the "Belgiums" (copyrigt Jennifer Capriati) to bump this thread up from the abyss. I couldn't even be arsed to watch it, and apparently it was one of those women's "high drama, a million errors" specials. The Double H is a triple Slam champion, and the Clidge sinks yet again in a Slam final to the tune of 6-3 4-6 6-3.

Fred, no howler could possibly come close to "Christine Henin-Hardenne" at the US Open last year!

The Ageless One is in the 3489383th Slam final of her career in the mixed doubles, and with Leander Paes will take on the equally legendary team of Nenad Zimonjic and Elena Bovina. Who would ever have though that Martina Mk I's career would outlast Martina Mk II's?

― The Lex (The Lex), Saturday, 31 January 2004 11:46 (twenty-two years ago)

By all accounts at least the Clidge fought this one out.

Marty I was on the radio beforehand, and was at least as interesting (and probably far more so) than the game itself. She said the first time she was meant to be 'past it' was 1981, before Marty II was a year old.

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Saturday, 31 January 2004 12:27 (twenty-two years ago)

I saw a fair bit of it - ended up rooting for Clijsters cos of the horrendous top that Jimmy Hill-Hardenne was wearing, which had the waistline cut higer at the front than at the back, so it kept exposing this little arc of flesh above the waist that just looked really quite horrid. It was basically errors that decided it - both toughed it out, but JHH was tougher. Clijsters seemed to be playing entirely on confidence, which ebbed and flowed rather sharply.

― William Bloody Swygart (mrswygart), Saturday, 31 January 2004 16:43 (twenty-two years ago)

I still have the last 45 minutes to watch on tape, but seeing as my afternoon was always going to involve riding around on buses in the rain listening to Radio 5 whilst contorted in mental rictus by the unfolding events at Anfield, I wasn't likely to avoid the result - so I came in here. I've very glad that red-clad Fontaine's 2-1 win over blue-clad Clij Me A River wasn't some kind of portent; but then there are no goalless draws in tennis. Not since Harold Solomon and Kent Carlsson retired, anyway.

It's just dawned on me that my favourite players are #1 in the world - that hasn't happened since... well, it's never happened.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Saturday, 31 January 2004 17:33 (twenty-two years ago)

My favourite players have never been world no 1 at the same time, and - goddamnit, Anastasia - in all likelihood never will. But I love JHH and watching Fed mesmerises me, so for the first time in ages I really like both No 1s. Unless Ferrero and JHH coincided in the autumn? I don't think Marat and Venus coincided, and I can't think of any other No 1s I've liked since the halcyon days of Steffi Graf.

I like how JHH is being portrayed as a bit of a bad girl, too... probably residue from the hand incident (gotta admire any 5'5" girl who can make Serena cry, really), but apparently she influenced the overruling of a dodgy line call at a crucial point in the final set in her favour. Then screamed "allez!" Allez indeed Justine, put your hands in the air like you just don't care cos niceness (the Clidge) gets you nowhere in tennis apart from the wrong end of Slam final losses.

― The Lex (The Lex), Saturday, 31 January 2004 18:15 (twenty-two years ago)

I didn't notice the "Allez!" nor can I comment on how much WellHardenne's jabbing finger and blast of aghast swayed the ump, but the overrule was a biggie. Another wayward drive-volley from Carstairs at 3-4 40/Ad in the 3rd which the TV replay suggested smacked the line, Hawk-Eye insisted was long and either way was far too close for the woman in the chair to pass judgment on.

Anyway, the winners mostly came from Juhenji; a man who is tired of that backhand is, well, possibly nauseated by arcs of Belgian midriff. Agassi used to have his shirts especially tailored (a testament to the flexibility and forgiving nature of the English language that I can just about use that word there) to give the snaparazzi lensfuls of Las Vegan belly-hair as he pivoted to slap back a forehand return (at, one likes to think, Buffalo Boris's shuffling shoelaces, as the Liemen Lech forfeited another service game).

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Sunday, 1 February 2004 01:07 (twenty-two years ago)

Early doors: four breaks in the first seven games, two apiece. Already two gaspers from Phed - both dipping backhands taken indecently early, still in their jim-jams - while Marat is returning into Roger's socks.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Sunday, 1 February 2004 03:39 (twenty-two years ago)

A great first set ups its genius quotient, sheds the errors, Saffy drags himself out of a double set-point mire at 5-6 to set up the following t/b:

RF skies a backhand on the 11th stroke of the rally attempting some subatomic spin: F0-1S
RF rolls an immaculate b/h line pass: F1-1S
Clean f/h winner off typically short MS 2nd serve: F2-1S
RF b/h error: F2-2S
First point with the serve, as RF slices in a wide one drawing the Russian mistake: F3-2S
MS loops an approach onto the baseline, RF thinks about it then whips the f/h pass: F4-2S
Surprising b/h error off an impoverished MS delivery: F4-3S
MS dragged wide, goes for low %age line-drive, misses: F5-3S
MS misses return long: F6-3S
RF hits creamy f/h winner, kissing tape en route: F7-3S

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Sunday, 1 February 2004 04:14 (twenty-two years ago)

It's 4:24am and I need coffee. As does Marat Safin - he's beginning to drag a little as Roger rediscovers his serving form (both were in the mid-40s, %age-wise, first set) and nabs an early break to boot in the 2nd. Familiar pattern, this.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Sunday, 1 February 2004 04:26 (twenty-two years ago)

The bottom line is Safin isn't serving well enough to make this a contest UNLESS... at 2-4 30/30 he double-faults to go break-point down, smashes his racket, gets the obligatory warning, but then fights back to hold with an ace (perhaps only his 2nd or 3rd of match - he hit over 30 vs both Roddick and Agassi). Maybe he's turned the corner.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Sunday, 1 February 2004 04:34 (twenty-two years ago)

Fedz two sets up: 7-6 6-4.

Saffy so befuddled at 3-5 he tried to serve from the wrong court; last time I saw anything like that in a GS final it was an utterly drained Stefan Edberg in the fifth set in Paris vs Chang in '89.

MS toughed out three set points in that game but is offering only token resistance to the Swiss delivery, now that 'Oges has decided to take a little pace off and get most of them in.

I hope Marat can find something from somewhere...

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Sunday, 1 February 2004 04:49 (twenty-two years ago)

MS saves four break-points in game three, set three - but not a fifth. It's looking like Fed in Free.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Sunday, 1 February 2004 05:04 (twenty-two years ago)

The man in the discontinuously hooped shirt will not be denied - Feddy continues to effervesce, up a double-break now. Saffy's melancholic banter has the crowd on his side but there's not much he can do.

[200th post!]

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Sunday, 1 February 2004 05:20 (twenty-two years ago)

Just turned the idiot box on to see that Saf's chances are looking jolly-well Rogered.

I just hope nobody says Federer had a soft final like Lleyt's Wimbledon. Rodge did what the Body and AA were unable to.

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Sunday, 1 February 2004 05:22 (twenty-two years ago)

Safin is Mont Blanc'd - 7-6 6-4 6-2 in 2hr15; Fedz fedtastic but what a match it could've been if Marat had landed with more than half his first serves. Whether that can be put down to eighteen hours on court in six previous matches I'm not sure. That's five straight-set men's GS finals in a row now; it's like we're being punished for enjoying Raft-Goran Wimb01 too much.

In other news, Navvy didn't win her queenteenth title in the mixed, but lost to the NZ/EB partnership (which seems Australasian enough to me). Men's doubles? Search me. It's 5:40am and I need my bed.

N'night, Fred.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Sunday, 1 February 2004 05:40 (twenty-two years ago)

heroic stuff all round (i'm referring to commentary above obv.)

― zebedee (zebedee), Sunday, 1 February 2004 14:38 (twenty-two years ago)

Men's final oddly underwhelming, though maybe Eurosport's hideous editing this morning contributed to that. It would probably have helped if either of them had managed to locate their first serve at any point, too.

Final roll of honour:

Men's singles - Roger Federer
Women's singles - Justine Henin-Hardenne
Men's doubles - Michael Llodra and Fabrice Santoro
Women's doubles - Virginia Ruano Pascual and Paola Suarez
Mixed doubles - Nenad Zimonjic and Elena Bovina
Boys' singles - Gael Monfils
Girls' singles - Shahar Peer
Boys' doubles - Brendan Evans and Scott Oudesma
Girls' doubles - Sheng-Nan Sun and Yung-Jan Chan

Good to see that the nickname potential is being kept strongly alive by the junior contingent. And that's that, the women now traipse off to Tokyo (where we have a Hantuchova/Molik re-re-re-rematch in round one, with the winner to probably face Sharapova) and the men play Davis Cup. Thankyou and goodnight!

― The Lex (The Lex), Sunday, 1 February 2004 14:55 (twenty-two years ago)

No, thank you. It's been the best grand slam ever if you follow it on this thread alone.

― Markelby (Mark C), Sunday, 1 February 2004 22:44 (twenty-two years ago)

News that Prat Cash may be thinking of taking a restraining order on Philippoussis in the wake of their little handbag-swinging session.

Sorry Prat, it's over. Your time in the spotlight has passed, you were always a painful little turd, and after all your puerile spoilt-brat antics as a player you're not embarrassed with your choice of legs to stand on now. Just go away, please.

To return to much more relevant and interesting issues, Roger carried off the title and we all enjoyed watching him but it was the other bloke who was involved in the memorable matches, and clagged himself thoroughly in the process. But the Agassi and Roddick epics will live long in the memory, and if Safin can stay fit he must be a chance to carry off some silverware later in the year.

Whither Hewitt? Who knows. Whither Rusedski? Who cares. Whither Agassi? Maybe he's starting to. Whither Nerk? Back to tennis hibernation until Wimbers. It's been fun. See yas in late June!

― Fred Nerk (Fred Nerk), Monday, 2 February 2004 00:42 (twenty-two years ago)

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