conference strategies

Alright. So, this Thursday & Friday, I will be attending my first work-related conference. I'm really glad that I won't be stuck behind my desk for a couple of days and, Hey!, free hotel stay. And gas reimbursements! And food per diems! But I'm no fool to believe that it will be interesting and fun. I looked over the itinerary -- topics include: Ethics of Being a Public Servant, Access to Justice: Pro Se Litigants, Workplace Ergonomics, and Jail Mail and Post-Conviction Issues.

Aaaaaaaaah!

Do I need to assemble a survival kit? Advice?

drugs. lots of drugs.

you need a strategy session for hotel bar tab to the boss

take breaks, don't nec go to every panel, get some air, don't eat too much sugar/carbs at lunch b/c you will totally fall asleep in yr chair during ergonomics session

Show up for first half day and a couple of coffee breaks. Disappear for the rest of the week. Explore town/city/country you happen to find yourself in. Avoid other delegates. Works every time.

Places awesome time had in while staying in five star hotels at conferences (not attended): Bangalore, Monterey peninsula/central CA, Pisa. Thank you my former employer.

ai lien what city ?

It's in Hot Springs, Arkansas -- no BFD. This is so small time! I live in Little Rock, which is about an hour away. The reason I'm so concerned with 'surviving' is that I am the youngest Trial Court Assistant in Arkansas. I get a hard time from the others -- I feel like I'll probably be looked after. I *think* I can get out of going on Friday -- gonna go to the races!

I will look into all options. Smiley face.

Hmm I might be going to a conference in Vienna. Unfortunately it's on a Tuesday and Wednesday, so I'll have to take time off if I want to spend a couple of days sight-seeing.

And there's a pre-conference event on the Monday (which I don't have to go to).

Is it worth taking Monday off work, so I can spend the weekend there? And will my manager rope me into going to the pre-event if she knows that I'll be in the city on Monday?

Is there a stage in your career when you can stop being so greedy about places you visit on business, and stop trying to fit in a few days of sightseeing too?

I wonder if there's any money in selling a deck of cards called "conference strategies"

1. empty the minibar.
2. whatever you were going to do in the evening, do at lunch.
3. switch hands.
4. put on a fake accent.

conferences I am attending this summer:

http://www.astro.unipd.it/omega08/ (I am going to be sure to get a hard copy of the conference poster for this one)
http://www.global-catastrophic-risks.com/

these panels are...not great.

Help!

master the art of cross-hatching

I just left one bc I couldn't take it anymore. Bonus break time?

excuse yourself for a bathroom break, insert buttplug, return to seat

write down as many conjugations of the verb "to congeal" as you can think of

vow not to leave the room until you can do that pen-flipping-around-your-finger trick

become bobby mcferrin

this session was apparently a 'facilitated duscussion' that consisted if a terrible introductory video to 'provoke thought' and then a woman running around the room with a mic asking questions but not letting anyone really answer before she started interjecting her own opinions and stories, the one time it seemed two people were starting to have an interesting conversation she interrupted and ruined it, at which point I ran for the door.

memorize ace frehley's singles in order of total sales

i'm chairing a panel at our conference coming up, probably more worried about that than i have been about any conference i've spoken at. (not rly the same thing as the terrible-sounding conferences mainly being discussed here, tho.)

I am moderating a panel this fall and I'm crazy nervous but I'm using this conference as a learning experience to watch what works and doesn't, so hopefully I will get something useful out of this even if it isn't the actual content.

The success of a conference depends entirely on whether the speakers have something useful to say and can say it clearly enough you get their point. Just what are the odds of that happening?!

well, if you're moderating and do a good job selecting and prepping panelists, odds can be good! But as an attendee, I am like who gave this woman a session?

tbh i'm going to insist that i be the mc / hype man for my speakers. "thus the procedures of artistic creation parallel with those of the philosophical." "YEAAAAAAAAH BWOOOY!"

"networking" at these things at 8 am is the worst
i do like sessions where the speaker gets excited about something obscure and there are 5 people in the room who get it and know why it's important and start asking questions and talking over one another. MY annoying tribe