When Parents Come to Visit

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What are the chances that the artist on the top floor of the Flat Iron Building will decide to take down his paintings before my Dad arrives Friday?

(They are of naked ladies, one spread eagle, carrying big guns)

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Monday, 30 August 2004 12:46 (twenty-one years ago)

Slim to none; you must prepare your father for 44-CALIBUR BEAVER.

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 30 August 2004 12:49 (twenty-one years ago)

Or I could just avoid that major intersection right by the el station for his entire visit?

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Monday, 30 August 2004 12:52 (twenty-one years ago)

Maybe it would be better to pull his head down as you walk past and scream "AVERT YOUR EYES! AVERT YOUR EYES!" into his ear.

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 30 August 2004 12:53 (twenty-one years ago)

Also, I should probably force him to wear headphones during his trip. He has really bad tinitus and the city noise might make him go crazy.

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Monday, 30 August 2004 12:59 (twenty-one years ago)

I hate when parents come to visit. When my parents come over its no big deal, a quick tidy and we are all set. When my wifes parents come for a visit its fucking chaos. My wife turns into bitch-bot. Its like the prime minister of the great land of Connecticut is arriving. A mad cleaning of every nook and cranny in the whole condo must take place. Just in case the prime minister wants to lay under the entertainment center. Sometimes I like to walk around in my underwear eating cheetos right up until the doorbell rings just to piss my wife off because she gets crazy.

― Velveteen Bingo (Chris V), Monday, 30 August 2004 13:03 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm a little crazy right now. I'm excited about seeing my Dad, but he's not pro-city life. Plus, he's deathly allergic to kitty hair, so I've started this huge mission to de-cat hair the entire apartment. I tried to convince him to just stay in a hotel but nothing doing.

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Monday, 30 August 2004 13:06 (twenty-one years ago)

One of these days im just going to answer the door in my tighties covered in powdered cheese.

― Velveteen Bingo (Chris V), Monday, 30 August 2004 13:07 (twenty-one years ago)

"Hey I was just doing your daughter, whats up PM."

― Velveteen Bingo (Chris V), Monday, 30 August 2004 13:08 (twenty-one years ago)

Smear chocolate on some condoms and leave them on the kitchen floor.

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 30 August 2004 13:09 (twenty-one years ago)

Perfect.

― Velveteen Bingo (Chris V), Monday, 30 August 2004 13:10 (twenty-one years ago)

or just smear some chocolate on the tighties.

― Velveteen Bingo (Chris V), Monday, 30 August 2004 13:15 (twenty-one years ago)

You could just lock the door.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 30 August 2004 13:17 (twenty-one years ago)

Preferably with your asscheeks.

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 30 August 2004 13:18 (twenty-one years ago)

You could boldly ask your wife to imagine that her parents wallow around in dirt and filth whenever she's not around.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 30 August 2004 13:19 (twenty-one years ago)

nothing your father hasn't seen before, right? the paintings, not the cheese powder

― kephm (kephm), Monday, 30 August 2004 13:20 (twenty-one years ago)

Even better is that this weekend = Sarah's dad, then the NEXT TWO WEEKENDS = my parents. Three weekends in a row of parental fun!

― n.a. (Nick A.), Monday, 30 August 2004 13:21 (twenty-one years ago)

Is this something that happens a lot to people, parents coming to visit? I usually go see them, not the other way around.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 30 August 2004 13:24 (twenty-one years ago)

Her parents only come up a few times a year. My parents never come by since they only live a few miles away. But when they do its relaxed. Not when the PM comes.

― Velveteen Bingo (Chris V), Monday, 30 August 2004 13:27 (twenty-one years ago)

In the context of the rest of the thread, you can't imagine how dirty that looks, n.a. (and Chris).

― R.I.M.A. (Barima), Monday, 30 August 2004 13:29 (twenty-one years ago)

it should be law that parents stay in a hotel or with friends when visiting their children.

― lauren (laurenp), Monday, 30 August 2004 14:15 (twenty-one years ago)

The parents wouldn't normally visit us, except that we moved several states away. So now they have to come see what our new location is like. But also, even though we techincally have 2 bedrooms, the 2nd one is too small for a bed, so the parents will be sleeping in our bedroom and we'll be sleeping on the floor in the other room. I mean, it would just be too weird the other way around, even though it's weird enough this way...

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Monday, 30 August 2004 15:08 (twenty-one years ago)

When the Prime Minister and his wife come to visit they stay in a hotel. So really all the cleaning and bitching are useless as they spend approximately 5 minutes in our house and then we go out for some ridiculous walk or something.

― Velveteen Bingo (Chris V), Monday, 30 August 2004 15:15 (twenty-one years ago)

http://sammy.hippy.jp/sketch/pic/large/p_silly_walk_01.jpg

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 30 August 2004 15:18 (twenty-one years ago)

Ha!

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Monday, 30 August 2004 15:20 (twenty-one years ago)

"let's go for a walk"
"we don't really do that here"
"what do you mean? it's a beautiful day, let's go!"
"it doesn't really work like that, there's nowhere to walk, this is a dangerous road"
"oh lighten up"

we walk, and a car pulls over, rolls down window.

"you folks all right? your car break down or something?"

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Monday, 30 August 2004 15:24 (twenty-one years ago)

I like to go on walks, but parents are OBSESSED with going on walks.

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Monday, 30 August 2004 15:32 (twenty-one years ago)

the in-laws are completely obsessed with walks. when we go visit them all they want to do is walk. granted they live on the beach which is nice. But there is no TV watching allowed there ever. I can't even check the score of the Red Sox game. "Can I check the score of the Sox game?" "Why don't you go for a walk instead." WTF? I'll walk to the bar down the street and get bombed and watch the game.

― Velveteen Bingo (Chris V), Monday, 30 August 2004 15:35 (twenty-one years ago)

I've also decided to answer the door from now on in my tighties, a beaver cap and 'mississippi queen' blaring on the stereo when they visit.

― Velveteen Bingo (Chris V), Monday, 30 August 2004 15:41 (twenty-one years ago)

when my folks came out to visit two years ago i played it like i was babysitting some 5 year olds: walked them everywhere during the day so they would be tired when we got home. worked well, did all the touristy things like shopping on michigan avenue (where my dad became the guy i hate who doesn't watch where he's going because he's looking at the buildings), took them to the art institute (more walking), navy pier (walking again), then walked from navy pier to north ave beach along the lake. i felt bad when on the trip back my pops had to rest because i forgot about the knee surgery he'd had a year or so before. i'm a bad son that way.

― otto midnight (otto midnight), Monday, 30 August 2004 15:44 (twenty-one years ago)

father in law is also a landscape architect as well as the tree commissioner of his town. So needless to say we get briefings on the history of this tree and that tree as we take these walks. Snoozefest you ask? Why yes of course. Until we get back and drink. They like to sip on grandpa's cough medicine.

― Velveteen Bingo (Chris V), Monday, 30 August 2004 15:53 (twenty-one years ago)

the last time my dad came to town we were gonna walk across the Brooklyn Bridge but he beefed it on the sidewalk. D'oh!

the last time my mom came to town we did walk across the Brooklyn Bridge, in February.

Neither has been back since.

― hstencil (hstencil), Monday, 30 August 2004 15:56 (twenty-one years ago)

Beefed it = throw up?!

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Monday, 30 August 2004 17:06 (twenty-one years ago)

no he wiped out while stepping onto a curb from the street.

― hstencil (hstencil), Monday, 30 August 2004 17:07 (twenty-one years ago)

My mom re-arranges my shelves, countertops, etc. She's Mom 24/7. I have to yell at her to just sit down and stay there.

― Je4nne ƒury (Jeanne Fury), Monday, 30 August 2004 17:19 (twenty-one years ago)

My mum brings alcohol and is usually very good company when she comes to visit. Occasionally she is a bit critical of my home furnishings, but she makes up for it by always doing my ironing.

― ailsa (ailsa), Monday, 30 August 2004 17:23 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm glad to say my Dad was oblivious to the naked lady pix. Either that or, more likely, he is just too blind to see up that high. The only time he seemed particularly disturbed by city life was when we rode past some really sad looking public housing, but that's understandable.

We did lots of fun things including walking around Oak Park and taking the architecture river boat tour. And we watched a hell of a lot of movies which, thankfully, were all rated PG.

― Sarah McLusky (coco), Tuesday, 7 September 2004 17:15 (twenty-one years ago)

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