what do you do when you don't know what to do ie is nicotine REALLY a drug?

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mmk so i decided to end the bender which you've all borne horrified witness to over the past week+ and discovered to my chagrin that i am incredibly dependent on some kinda drug or other to get me through the night. it is now 7 o'clock, i've done nothing but drink a whole lot of soda (i decided not to exclude caffeine, this prolly was a bad idea) and now i don't know what to do but i am contemplating driving to a convenience store and getting a pack of cigarettes. is this a good idea or a bad idea, that is, will i be violating my solemn oath if i do so?

IF bad idea: how do you chill when you want to chill?

you can answer that either way, actually

sry, i'm just typing this to keep me sane basically.

― John (jdahlem), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 00:56 (twenty-one years ago)

It isn't working.

― Tep (ktepi), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 00:59 (twenty-one years ago)

YOUR EMAIL ADDRESS IS NOT FUNNY DUDE

― John (jdahlem), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 01:00 (twenty-one years ago)

John, it's been so long since your last thread!
Where have you been? We called all the hospitals, and you weren't in ANY of them!

― Aaron Hertz (AaronHz), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 01:03 (twenty-one years ago)

It's useful for people I talk to in email so I don't clutter up indifferent/hostile message boards with my clusterfuck ramblings, oblivious to how tiresome and obnoxious I am, out of some psychological analogue to the inability to smell my own farts. But if, on top of that, it isn't very funny, I think I'll get by.

― Tep (ktepi), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 01:04 (twenty-one years ago)

what do you think will happen if you don't get drugs in you?

― 00ps, Tuesday, 18 January 2005 01:05 (twenty-one years ago)

i have listened to "then came you" 6X in a row

tep you hurt me dude.

― John (jdahlem), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 01:06 (twenty-one years ago)

Hahahaha! (to Tep)

how do you chill when you want to chill?

John, it's called rehab.

― I Am Curious (George) (Rock Hardy), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 01:07 (twenty-one years ago)

anyway tep dude my ramblings were all at like 3AM in the morning, try sleep more.

i am eating lots of bagel bites.

this thread stops being about me as of RIGHT NOW.

------------------------------------------------------------------

― John (jdahlem), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 01:10 (twenty-one years ago)

Err... you started it.

― Trayce (trayce), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 01:11 (twenty-one years ago)

tep there may have been some miscommunication there but you do realize "glass" = "meth" right, i mean i wasn't trying to call you unfunny because i thought you were taunting/tempting me personally. if that is the case, you are an asshole. if not, nevermind and it is irrelevent, and what's more, good for you.

― John (jdahlem), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 01:14 (twenty-one years ago)

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v296/WilliamCrump63/honest.jpg

― I Am Curious (George) (Rock Hardy), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 01:15 (twenty-one years ago)

That's only directed at John, by the way.

― I Am Curious (George) (Rock Hardy), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 01:15 (twenty-one years ago)

trayce my point is, i did not (believe it or not) start this thread so people could say HA HA U GET WHAT U DESERVE, i'm seriously wondering how people unwind w/out the use of various drugs.

oh nevermind.

xpost i don't get it.

― John (jdahlem), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 01:16 (twenty-one years ago)

oh and i was also wondering if it would be ok for me to smoke a pack of cigarettes but nevermind about that too.

― John (jdahlem), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 01:17 (twenty-one years ago)

John, Teps email addy is real and he's had it for ages. I doubt very much it has anything to do with meth let alone you.

Smoke some cigs if you want to, but look hard at your logic at the moment - you need something - anything - to "chill" or be out of your own head. Iknow that feeling but if you cant be yourself and get off that brakeless train, you have a problem and you need to address it.

― Trayce (trayce), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 01:20 (twenty-one years ago)

thinking of my life as a brakeless train is actually really wonderful, o would that it were true

i hav decided not to smoke the cigarettes btw. i fuckin hate em anyway, they just look nice is all.

― John (jdahlem), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 01:24 (twenty-one years ago)

haha i just got george's comic, that is pretty funny actually.

― John (jdahlem), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 01:24 (twenty-one years ago)

You are the lovechild of Jon Williams and Aja, and I claim my 5 dollars.

― 00ps, Tuesday, 18 January 2005 01:31 (twenty-one years ago)

Hey oops why aren't you logged in and why dont you post anymore?

― Trayce (trayce), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 01:31 (twenty-one years ago)

I can't log in! And...oh you're logged into MSN now, huh....

― 00ps, Tuesday, 18 January 2005 01:33 (twenty-one years ago)

John, in response to your email: no, not really. I think you're a child with some grown-up drug and alcohol problems, and I'm torn between wanting to treat you like a child (in which case I'd say, "fuck off and get your mommy and daddy to get you some help") and treating you like an adult (in which case I'd say "fuck off and get yourself some help"). Either way, I do hope you get some help, but you won't find it in a pack of smokes or a case of soda. You won't find it in ILX either — you might find encouragement, you might find good wishes, but you won't find the help you truly need.

― I Am Curious (George) (Rock Hardy), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 01:34 (twenty-one years ago)

dude i fully realize ilx is nothing more than one gigantic timewaster, i think that's kinda obv in this very thread

― John (jdahlem), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 01:35 (twenty-one years ago)

What exactly were you hoping/looking for? We're none of us expert counsellors here, just a bunch of guys, ya know?

― Trayce (trayce), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 01:57 (twenty-one years ago)

i dunno but one thing i am most certainly not looking for, is therapy. so it's cool.

― John (jdahlem), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 01:59 (twenty-one years ago)

are you looking for a wife?

― caitlin oh no (caitxa1), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 02:03 (twenty-one years ago)

i am kind of not into intimacy, which is why i post all my most horrible secrets to the internet for all to see. also, i hate sex. so, no.

― John (jdahlem), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 02:05 (twenty-one years ago)

oh, come on! it'll be fun!

― caitlin oh no (caitxa1), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 02:08 (twenty-one years ago)

HI DERE

― heavy d interpol herpes (deangulberry), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 02:09 (twenty-one years ago)

hellooooooooooooooo?

― caitlin oh no (caitxa1), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 02:10 (twenty-one years ago)

are you gainfully employed?

EX POST

― John (jdahlem), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 02:10 (twenty-one years ago)

I am thinking of Nurse Ratched and Brad Dourif.

― I Am Curious (George) (Rock Hardy), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 02:11 (twenty-one years ago)

My dads died of nicotine. Please people. Disrespectful.

― heavy d interpol herpes (deangulberry), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 02:11 (twenty-one years ago)

xpost! i make $22.47 per week.

― caitlin oh no (caitxa1), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 02:13 (twenty-one years ago)

i am envious, but i don't think it's gonna work. nurse ratched was really hot, though.

― John (jdahlem), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 02:16 (twenty-one years ago)

it wouldn't work out anyway. you eat butter.

― caitlin oh no (caitxa1), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 02:20 (twenty-one years ago)

I eat feces.

and babies.

― MY FAVOURITE LIGHTER IS CHEESEBURGER (trigonalmayhem), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 02:59 (twenty-one years ago)

my left eye is totally shot, i am, on viscious instinct alone, guzzling caffeine like there is no tomorrow [there will be no caffeine tomorrow], and i will not sleep a wink tonight.

― John (jdahlem), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 05:28 (twenty-one years ago)

[btw it is kinda important to me to correct this misconception (the fault of which is entirely my own) that i am a "junkie" or need "rehab", but i'm not really sure how to do so w/out seeming the archetypal Denier. but yeah, i'm not, and i don't, i'm just really freakin bored. (this last is probably quite apparent)]

[i am mostly talking to george here. i might've emailed it but the last time i sent him an email he replied publically; there is no sense of propriety in the world today.]

― John (jdahlem), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 05:33 (twenty-one years ago)

Jeffrey Wigand was my friend's substitute high school english teacher.

― hstencil (hstencil), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 07:21 (twenty-one years ago)

I just don't want to get into an email exchange with you, John. I prefer that anything we say to each other be right out here in the open.

― I Am Curious (George) (Rock Hardy), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 14:45 (twenty-one years ago)

i dunno but one thing i am most certainly not looking for, is therapy. so it's cool.

-- John (johndahle...), January 18th, 2005 8:59 PM.

Uh... most the time when people post their personal problems on the internet, it's 'cause they need therapy and don't want to admit it. Or they want attention. At least that's what I think.

John, just quit being a fucking pussy and MAN THE FUCK UP. Nicotine is a drug, and if you're bored why don't you learn to knit or something.

― sugarpants (sugarpants), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 16:48 (twenty-one years ago)

i want attention and need therapy.

― John (jdahlem), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 16:52 (twenty-one years ago)

Booze is my anti-drug.

― The Mad Puffin (The Mad Puffin), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 16:55 (twenty-one years ago)

also sugar, i think you are missing the point.

― John (jdahlem), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 17:02 (twenty-one years ago)

i am going to crash very hard soon. but other than that i feel ok. i hav not taken any druqs whatsoever for thet past 11 hrs and tomorrow, i am going to get a job.

thank you.

-----------------------[lock thread please]-------------------------------------

― John (jdahlem), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 18:14 (twenty-one years ago)

you need someone to sex you up. kenny g perhaps?

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 18:22 (twenty-one years ago)

Dood, I can't handle any more "wahh wahh wahh look at me" drug addicts, OK? I've got like a bajillion in my family already.

― sugarpants (sugarpants), Tuesday, 18 January 2005 21:29 (twenty-one years ago)

latebloomer otm.

sugar i am sorry i remind you of something intimately painful to you. i assure you it is not intentional on my part.

btw: fuck this.

[now we can lock the thread seriously. you hot sexy piece of modmeat you.]

― John (jdahlem), Wednesday, 19 January 2005 03:06 (twenty-one years ago)

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