Debunk Famous Myths About Women

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1) Women love men who are dating someone else. You know, like the Chris Rock "Blowjob Contest" routine. I don't know, when in relationships I didn't have to constantly fend off the advances of deranged homewreckers. Good thing too, cause I don't have any self-control.

― Chris H. (chrisherbert), Monday, 9 May 2005 18:38 (twenty-one years ago)

2. Women do not, in fact, be shoppin'.

― n/a (Nick A.), Monday, 9 May 2005 18:40 (twenty-one years ago)

2) Women and gay men have a special relationship.

I've known so many girls who talk about having gay friends like they're toys. "What I need is a bitchy queen who'll sit around and eat ice cream with me and watch Margaret Cho DVDs. Ooh, and make a gag me with a spoon gesture when Britney and Kevin are on E!" Come on ladies, they're human beings.

― Chris H. (chrisherbert), Monday, 9 May 2005 18:41 (twenty-one years ago)

Er, if all the women you know are running around saying what you wrote in #2, how are you debunking that myth???

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 9 May 2005 18:42 (twenty-one years ago)

Because they don't actually have any gay friends. There's no relationship.

― Chris H. (chrisherbert), Monday, 9 May 2005 18:43 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm thinking relationship like Madonna in "Truth or Dare." The "these gay boys are my children" type of thing.

― Chris H. (chrisherbert), Monday, 9 May 2005 18:44 (twenty-one years ago)

Y'know what I mean?

― Chris H. (chrisherbert), Monday, 9 May 2005 18:44 (twenty-one years ago)

You messed up the numbering already dude.

― n/a (Nick A.), Monday, 9 May 2005 18:45 (twenty-one years ago)

girls do not want a pony for christmas

― womanizer, Monday, 9 May 2005 18:45 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm dumb, sorry

― Chris H. (chrisherbert), Monday, 9 May 2005 18:46 (twenty-one years ago)

girls do not want a pony for christmas

Hahaha SUCKS TO BE GINUWINE, THEN

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 9 May 2005 18:46 (twenty-one years ago)

Women do not in fact have vaginas. I know because I met some at this place called the Manhole, and I ascertained that they wanted to get laid by me, but then when we got back to my place it turned out that they, well, let's just say they didn't have vaginas. I think vaginas are a myth, or possibly computer-animated.

― nabisco (nabisco), Monday, 9 May 2005 18:52 (twenty-one years ago)

The two men in their lives: Ben AND Jerry.

― andy --, Monday, 9 May 2005 18:53 (twenty-one years ago)

4. They don't really have teeth down there.

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Monday, 9 May 2005 18:53 (twenty-one years ago)

ihttp://www.geocities.com/emurphy23/mindblown.txt

― jigga wha?, Monday, 9 May 2005 18:56 (twenty-one years ago)

I've often heard that women are attracted to men with babies, and I don't think this is true. I like BABIES. But I do not want one, and I would not, at this point in my life, like to be in a relationship with a man who has one. It's just that babies are cute and funny and weird, and people smile at them.
I bet this myth has been perpetuated by men with babies who think women are attracted to them because of the babies, when in reality the women are just smiling because the babies are all pudgy-drooly and clenching their toes.

― kirsten (kirsten), Monday, 9 May 2005 18:57 (twenty-one years ago)

Though it's worth noting that men who are nice to babies are more attractive to women than, say, men who yell at babies and play tricks on them.

― nabisco (nabisco), Monday, 9 May 2005 18:59 (twenty-one years ago)

Yes, of course.

― kirsten (kirsten), Monday, 9 May 2005 19:00 (twenty-one years ago)

I guess i'll have to make up for that trait with some of my other......qualities.

― Fetchboy (Felcher), Monday, 9 May 2005 19:00 (twenty-one years ago)

I would never be attracted to a man who played tricks on a baby.
x-post

― kirsten (kirsten), Monday, 9 May 2005 19:00 (twenty-one years ago)

men who yell at babies and play tricks on them

There's an image. "Hey, baby! You want some candy? PHYYYYYCHE! STUPID BABY!"

― slightly more subdued (kenan), Monday, 9 May 2005 19:02 (twenty-one years ago)

you'd be surprised, kristen

― Fetchboy (Felcher), Monday, 9 May 2005 19:02 (twenty-one years ago)

I WOULD be attracted to a man who plays tricks on a baby?

― kirsten (kirsten), Monday, 9 May 2005 19:03 (twenty-one years ago)

"PHYYYYYCHE!"?

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 9 May 2005 19:04 (twenty-one years ago)

all im saying, dont knock it till you've tried it

― Fetchboy (Felcher), Monday, 9 May 2005 19:04 (twenty-one years ago)

"PHYYYYYCHE!"?

Yeah, you pronounce that. I cannot.

Study reveals: Babies are stupid

― slightly more subdued (kenan), Monday, 9 May 2005 19:04 (twenty-one years ago)

One entry found for fyke.

Main Entry: fyke
Pronunciation: 'fIk
Function: noun
Etymology: Dutch fuik
: a long bag net kept open by hoops

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Monday, 9 May 2005 19:06 (twenty-one years ago)

i think it's pronounced "fishe"
"fi" as in "fire"
"sh" as in... well "sh"

― Fetchboy (Felcher), Monday, 9 May 2005 19:08 (twenty-one years ago)

I was thinking "fiiiiiish!"
Anyway, I think dudes with babies are a lot like dudes with puppies, at least in the "picking up women" department. We're just going to walk by and think, 'What a cute baby/puppy' and smile at the baby/puppy.
x-post again

― kirsten (kirsten), Monday, 9 May 2005 19:09 (twenty-one years ago)

I was thinking "fiiiiiish!"

Take a fish...
And a potato...

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, 9 May 2005 19:10 (twenty-one years ago)

"psyche", perhaps?

― La Monte (La Monte), Monday, 9 May 2005 19:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh come now: surely men and women both think slightly better of people who demonstrate some ability to get along well with children and small animals! It's not a matter of actually having them, just that, I dunno, if I saw some woman in the park playing adorable games with babies and letting bluejays perch on her shoulders and having fuzzy bunnies curl up in her lap while pokey puppies danced all around her, well ... okay, nevermind I would never talk to that particular person. But in general, you know?

― nabisco (nabisco), Monday, 9 May 2005 19:12 (twenty-one years ago)

"liiiisa... we've got periodicals on microfiiiiiiiche"

― cindy margolis holocaust (Jody Beth Rosen), Monday, 9 May 2005 19:14 (twenty-one years ago)

"psyche", perhaps?

no, that's pronounced "sikey"

― cindy margolis holocaust (Jody Beth Rosen), Monday, 9 May 2005 19:15 (twenty-one years ago)

(rhymes with "crikey")

― cindy margolis holocaust (Jody Beth Rosen), Monday, 9 May 2005 19:15 (twenty-one years ago)

To build upon Andy's myth, women only eat pints of ice cream with GIGANTIC spoons

― jill schoelen is the queen of my dreams! (Homosexual II), Monday, 9 May 2005 19:16 (twenty-one years ago)

-Shopping cheers women up. Especially shoe shopping.

Shopping somehow manages to make me simultaneously anxious and bored. Especially shoe shopping.

-Women love chocolate.

Not I.

― kirsten (kirsten), Monday, 9 May 2005 19:19 (twenty-one years ago)

Women, if given the chance, will bitch and moan about their periods for hours on end.

HOUSEHOLD FACT.

― jill schoelen is the queen of my dreams! (Homosexual II), Monday, 9 May 2005 19:21 (twenty-one years ago)

Women mean yes when they say no. They don't know their own minds.

― cindy margolis holocaust (Jody Beth Rosen), Monday, 9 May 2005 19:25 (twenty-one years ago)

all women keep incredibly detailed mental lists of all their sexual experiences, in a very strict ranking in order of quality. no matter how long you are with a woman, you will never be told where the ones involving you rate.

― g e o f f (gcannon), Monday, 9 May 2005 19:29 (twenty-one years ago)

all women turn into their mother. meet her mother as soon as you can, to know what you are really getting.

― g e o f f (gcannon), Monday, 9 May 2005 19:29 (twenty-one years ago)

this one is actually true.

― cindy margolis holocaust (Jody Beth Rosen), Monday, 9 May 2005 21:02 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, I didn't want to be the one to say it, but...

― slightly more subdued (kenan), Monday, 9 May 2005 21:06 (twenty-one years ago)

Women are more emotional than men. Women are cattier than men. - these are both laughably false in my experience. Dudes be gossiping like no one's business.

― milozauckerman (miloaukerman), Monday, 9 May 2005 21:18 (twenty-one years ago)

No no, women gossip, men discuss.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Monday, 9 May 2005 21:20 (twenty-one years ago)

Myth #47: Women cannot keep their hands off me.

This is so not true.

― gypsy mothra (gypsy mothra), Monday, 9 May 2005 21:33 (twenty-one years ago)

PS - Not that being in the military affords a person any less respect than anyone else. It's just that in the neighborhood where I work, which is full of snobby faux-liberal rich people, "are you in the military or something?" is pretty much the worst insult they can think of.

― kirsten (kirsten), Monday, 9 May 2005 21:46 (twenty-one years ago)

Oops! I totally put that on the wrong thread.

― kirsten (kirsten), Monday, 9 May 2005 21:52 (twenty-one years ago)

18b. Women be postin' in the wrong thread.

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Monday, 9 May 2005 21:58 (twenty-one years ago)

Women totally do NOT get into their underwear and have tickle and/or pillow fights on the bed while having sleepovers.

Sorry guys ;P

― Trayce (trayce), Monday, 9 May 2005 23:55 (twenty-one years ago)

Skipping 12 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

My favorite women be shoppin' for rare vinyl.

― slightly more subdued (kenan), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 03:30 (twenty-one years ago)

i think your glasses are thinking for you at this point.

― ()ops (()()ps), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 03:31 (twenty-one years ago)

My woman be cleanin' out the nearby bookstore's reserves of Modern Library editions from the 60's, just because of the cover designs. That's my kinda shoppin'.

― slightly more subdued (kenan), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 03:32 (twenty-one years ago)

i think your glasses are thinking for you at this point.

hahahaha

What can I do?

― slightly more subdued (kenan), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 03:32 (twenty-one years ago)

Women shop because we HAVE TO, you recalictrant male bastards *mutters about the groceries*

― Trayce (trayce), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 03:42 (twenty-one years ago)

Fickleness, chocolate-loving, mother-metamorphosing, and tickle/pillow-fight parties with other women are all frequently occurring motifs among the women in my own personal life. I am fine with all these things happening (okay, I have a few reservations about the mother thing I guess) but holy cow do they ever happen. as far as I've seen. in my limited experience. as a loathesome man.

ILX women be iconoclastin'!

― Dan I. (Dan I.), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 04:08 (twenty-one years ago)

Eh, I just love telling guys the tickle fights in knickers dont happen, cos it always upsets 'em ;)

― Trayce (trayce), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 04:09 (twenty-one years ago)

yeah but teenage girls having their first lesbian experience with each other at a sleepover DOES, so nyah

― ()ops (()()ps), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 04:11 (twenty-one years ago)

i went to an all girl boarding school for five years as a teenager and i never participated in or witnessed a pillow fight the entire time. i simply cannot believe that there is a basis in truth for this myth.

― gem (trisk), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 04:41 (twenty-one years ago)

Gem, maybe we got left out of some sekrit society where the women all lezz up, eat chocolate and buy shoes all the time :(

― Trayce (trayce), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 04:42 (twenty-one years ago)

that bloke who called me mannish might be right. maybe our lives will never be fulfilled.

― gem (trisk), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 04:48 (twenty-one years ago)

*takes clothes off*

Want some chocolate?

― Trayce (trayce), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 04:49 (twenty-one years ago)

yes plz

― slightly more subdued (kenan), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 04:50 (twenty-one years ago)

you'd best duck or i'll smack you with this feather pillow

― gem (trisk), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 05:00 (twenty-one years ago)

yes plz

― slightly more subdued (kenan), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 05:04 (twenty-one years ago)

ha I knew I shouldn't have said anything. it's just that there did happen to be a female slumber party thing comlete with tickling and pillow fights here this last weekend.

― Dan I. (Dan I.), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 05:30 (twenty-one years ago)

JPGS

― every str8 man on ilx (Jody Beth Rosen), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 05:31 (twenty-one years ago)

I only have pics of the aftermath, in which for some reason everyone involved ended up with pornographic drawings and slogans graffiti-ed on their backs with pens.

― Dan I. (Dan I.), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 05:39 (twenty-one years ago)

I take it back, they weren't acting as representatives of girls, more like that of the mentally disabled actually.

― Dan I. (Dan I.), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 05:40 (twenty-one years ago)

THIS IS THE THREAD WHERE ALL THE HOT ILXOR GIRLZ GET TO THEIR UNDEWEAR AND HAVE TEH PILLOW FIGHTS

Off you go.

― Johnney B (Johnney B), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 06:15 (twenty-one years ago)

i have found kenan's dream girl

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 07:43 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.lblwindows.com/Woman.jpg

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 07:44 (twenty-one years ago)

I think it's perpetuated because we talk often about things we want to buy

I love my bloke very much, but one of the things he does that really pisses me off is to constantly tell me I can't afford things that I know I can't afford, like I'm some kind of lunatic woman who's going to run out and buy a new car or a new bed or a new sofa just because I saw one I liked and remarked that I would like to have it. I think he believes the stereotype about shopping. The only things I shop for these days are dog chews and sometimes online music. That's it. Not shoes, not clothes, not makeup.

― accentmonkey (accentmonkey), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 10:43 (twenty-one years ago)

Women have some amazing power of empathy that means we can see everyone else's point of view all the time, so the POV gun doesn't work on us, how hilarious. Ok, this is the last time I mention this.

― Cathy (Cathy), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 11:59 (twenty-one years ago)

Typical Girls

(Ari Up/Tessa Pollitt/Viv Albertine/Palmolive)

Don't create
Don't rebel
Have intuition
Typical girls
Get upset too quickly
Typical girls
Are so confusing
Typical girls
You can always tell
Typical girls
Are unpredicatble
Typical girls
Try to be
Typical girls
Very well
Typical girls
Are looking for something
Typical girls
Fall under a spell
Typical girls
Buy magazines
Typical girls
Fell like hell
Typical girls
Worry about spots, and fat, and natural smells
Typical girls
Try to be
Typical girls
Very well
Typical girls
Can't decide what clothes to wear
Typical girls
Are sensitive
Typical girls
Are emotional
Typical girls
Are cruel
[...]
Typical girls
She's a femme fatale
Typical girls
Stand by their men
Typical girls
Learn how to act shocked
[...]
Who invented typical girls?
Who's putting out the new, improved model
There's another marketing ploy
Typical girl gets the typical boy

― piscesboy, Tuesday, 10 May 2005 12:01 (twenty-one years ago)

Those lyrics are thin!

― mark grout (mark grout), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 12:12 (twenty-one years ago)

I smiled at the POV gun joke. But I've told Cathy that already.

― Madchen (Madchen), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 14:40 (twenty-one years ago)

Another myth: when women are in a group and not around men, lots of Sapphism is most likely abound. Sorry, Jeff Murdock, nice fantasy.

― That's not cocaine! It's Ian Riese-Moraine! (Eastern Mantra), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 14:49 (twenty-one years ago)

(Cathy, I'm going to take on that argument on the Hitchhiker's thread, okay?)

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 14:53 (twenty-one years ago)

That we do not eat Yorkie bars.

― Madchen (Madchen), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 15:00 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.hyperthought.net/BBC/HTI/ca970707c.gif

― jaymc (jaymc), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 15:24 (twenty-one years ago)

Oh Cathy.

― n/a (Nick A.), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 15:24 (twenty-one years ago)

Does anyone actually recognize themselves in that stupid fucking comic?

― jaymc (jaymc), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 15:25 (twenty-one years ago)

Hello Kitty has no mouth. Cathy has no nose.

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 15:26 (twenty-one years ago)

There's a little Cathy in all of us.

― n/a (Nick A.), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 15:27 (twenty-one years ago)

Hopefully being corroded by our stomach acid.

― n/a (Nick A.), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 15:27 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.fminus.net/images/mess4.jpg

― jaymc (jaymc), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 15:30 (twenty-one years ago)

I did the Sparks gender test and it told me I was a man.

― Alix with an i? (alix), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 15:37 (twenty-one years ago)

They weren't fooled by the 'i', then?

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 17:08 (twenty-one years ago)

If the Sparks test is to see which member of Sparks you are most like then it's no wonder it told you you were a man.

― $V£N! (blueski), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 17:10 (twenty-one years ago)

but was it the girlier one of the duo?

― $V£N! (blueski), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 17:10 (twenty-one years ago)

girls like comic books, avant-rock, science fiction, and fantasy less than physically underadvantaged boys do

― dr. crock, Tuesday, 10 May 2005 18:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Another myth: when women are in a group and not around men, lots of Sapphism is most likely abound. Sorry, Jeff Murdock, nice fantasy.

No shit. Not everyone is gay, or even a little bit gay. Get the fuck over it.

― it's mashed potato time! (dymaxia), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 20:33 (twenty-one years ago)

It's not gay when women do it, it's precious and mystical.

― The Ghost of Because There Are Four Breasts (Dan Perry), Tuesday, 10 May 2005 20:36 (twenty-one years ago)

Women's sexuality is precious and mystical

― it's mashed potato time! (dymaxia), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 06:36 (twenty-one years ago)

I know many women who do not know how to weave.

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 08:13 (twenty-one years ago)

"Woman"

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 08:15 (twenty-one years ago)

Um, that came out wrong.

"Woman" <-- "wifman" <-- person who weaves.
"Man <-- "weapnaman" <-- person who carries a weapon.

My favorite part about this is that if you decided to weave, you were called a "wifman," and if you decided to carry a weapon you were a "weapnaman," regardless of whatever.

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 08:18 (twenty-one years ago)

It's far too long here since the last discussion of tickling and pillow-fighting in lingerie.

― Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 11:18 (twenty-one years ago)

Women need men like a PHYYYYYCHE needs a bi-cycle.

― M. White (Miguelito), Wednesday, 11 May 2005 14:43 (twenty-one years ago)

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