Seeking Your Advice and Consolation: Solo Parenting with a Cold

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Yeah, I know, poor me.

The wife left this morning for her fifteenth college reunion in Vermont. She won't be back until Sunday night. I'm looking after our one year old on my own. My folks are out of town. My wife's folks don't live here. Our two regular babysitters are out of town. Our cool, helpful nextdoor neighbors are out of town. My friend Sean (who also has a baby the same age as ours) is out of town (presumably with his brood). The only person I can really call is my nutzoid sister, but she's way the hell out in Westchester (nowhere nearby). Basically, should anything happen, I'm on my own. The baby's asleep now.

Oh, and I have a cold.

...and am starting to panic, slightly.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Friday, 3 June 2005 16:36 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.jalopnik.com/cars/images/macaulay_culkin.jpg

― Amateur(ist) (Amateur(ist)), Friday, 3 June 2005 16:39 (twenty-one years ago)

Pretty much.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Friday, 3 June 2005 16:40 (twenty-one years ago)

no wait i mean

http://lib1.store.vip.sc5.yahoo.com/lib/nightowl/hangintherebirdlg.jpg

― Amateur(ist) (Amateur(ist)), Friday, 3 June 2005 16:40 (twenty-one years ago)

What on earth is liable to happen, Alex? Charlotte will wake up, be hungry, demand some food and a drink, fill a couple of nappies, gurgle and smile a bit, get grumpy, and have another nap. You can fill in the gaps by playing with her for a while or giving her a bath.

I would sometimes get back from work on a day when my Bloke had been in charge of looking after our toddler daughter, to find she was sitting on an oily garage floor while he pottered around stripping a car engine or something, and to entertain her he had given her a huge block of splintery wood, an old lump hammer and some rusty nails to bang into it (this is not a good suggestion, btw). Men have such a different approach to childcare.

You'll be fine :)

― C J (C J), Friday, 3 June 2005 16:42 (twenty-one years ago)

Cheers, CJ. I'm reasonably sure I'll be fine. But she throws a curve-ball every now and again (once bit her tongue and spewed a blood vomit worthy of vintage Kiss, once threw up all over me Exorcist-stylee, once had a volcanic bout of diahrhea that I'll truly never mentally recover from, once.....dearl lord....poohed in the middle of bathtime). Things can and sometimes do go wrong...even when the caregiver is competent.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Friday, 3 June 2005 16:46 (twenty-one years ago)

isn't there like a 24-hour babysitting dispatch in new york city?

― Amateur(ist) (Amateur(ist)), Friday, 3 June 2005 16:48 (twenty-one years ago)

Maybe you can get some no1z3 dud3s to come babysit.

― Jordan (Jordan), Friday, 3 June 2005 16:49 (twenty-one years ago)

Even if there is, ya can't just plug a stranger into the mix and expect everything to be fine.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Friday, 3 June 2005 16:49 (twenty-one years ago)

I refuse to believe she ever did any of those things. She looks far too angelic!

― C J (C J), Friday, 3 June 2005 16:49 (twenty-one years ago)

Cheers & thanks, but trust me.....she has a dark side.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Friday, 3 June 2005 16:51 (twenty-one years ago)

http://homepage.mac.com/alexinnyc/.cv/alexinnyc/Sites/.Pictures/Photo%20Album%20Pictures/2005-05-31%2015.44.27%20-0700/Image-883E7814D22111D9.jpg-thumb_105_140.jpg

(the child in question, if you've never seen the quadrooplajillion other pics I've already pasted of her all over ILX).

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Friday, 3 June 2005 16:53 (twenty-one years ago)

What the fuck are Vader and Threepio doing behind ol' Macauley up there?

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Friday, 3 June 2005 16:54 (twenty-one years ago)

isn't it obvious?

damn alex, you have a cute kid.

― Amateur(ist) (Amateur(ist)), Friday, 3 June 2005 16:55 (twenty-one years ago)

Email her to me, Alex. I want to adopt her immediately :)

― C J (C J), Friday, 3 June 2005 16:56 (twenty-one years ago)

damn alex, you have a cute kid.

Thanky, Spanky. Mercifully, she takes after my wife.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Friday, 3 June 2005 16:59 (twenty-one years ago)

The only sensible advice I can give to avoid further explosive diarrhoeia or vomiting or accidental tongue-biting is not to get Charlotte over-excited, and not to change her diet by introducing nre foods that she may not be used to and which might upset her digestive system. Stick to the tried-and-true. If you are giving her fresh fruits etc, make sure you chop them into small enough pieces that she won't choke on them. You're probably safest with just slices of banana or avocado. Don't bounce her around too much after meals. Don't bathe her right after she's eaten or she's liable to be sick (or poo in the bath again).

But you know all this stuff anyway, right?

― C J (C J), Friday, 3 June 2005 17:02 (twenty-one years ago)

Yeah, but a little reinforcement of the otherwise seemingly obvious is always welcome.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Friday, 3 June 2005 17:03 (twenty-one years ago)

Consider yourself lucky if she's only crapped in the bath once.

Relax, dude, it'll be fine. Fun playtime activity: teach her to sing Killing Joke songs.

― Rock Hardy (Rock Hardy), Friday, 3 June 2005 17:03 (twenty-one years ago)

Even better, teach her the call-and-response part of "Jocko Homo."

― Rock Hardy (Rock Hardy), Friday, 3 June 2005 17:06 (twenty-one years ago)

Bahahaha

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Friday, 3 June 2005 17:06 (twenty-one years ago)

Make playdough for her! Better than shop-bought toxic stuff, this homemade version is harmless in case she inadvertently eats any of it :

3 Cups of Plain Flour
3 Cups of Water with added food colouring of your choice
1½ Cups of Salt
3 Tablespoons of cooking oil
6 Teaspoons of Cream of Tartar

Put all ingredients into a saucepan, and stir while cooking over a medium heat until it thickens into a big blob. Leave to cool, then have endless hours of fun making monster-models for her and watching her squish it into your priceless Persian rugs!

― C J (C J), Friday, 3 June 2005 17:08 (twenty-one years ago)

Don't kiss on her though and give her your cold! Bad daddy!

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Friday, 3 June 2005 17:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Ugh. Believe me, her catching my cold is decidedly not what I need.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Friday, 3 June 2005 17:13 (twenty-one years ago)

will this be the longest you two have been together without mommy? you'll be fine. have fun!

― scott seward (scott seward), Friday, 3 June 2005 17:15 (twenty-one years ago)

Well, I look after her solo all day on Tues and Weds, but my wife comes home around 5:30 and either takes over or shares the burden. This is actually the first time my wife has ever been away from the baby (and I'm also worried how she's doin', but she's with her friends and long overdue for a break, so hopefully she's having fun). But, yeah, this is the longest stretch of just the Chazbo and m'self.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Friday, 3 June 2005 17:17 (twenty-one years ago)

the one-on-one thing can be great. maria went away for three days when rufus was a year or maybe a little older and we had a great time. i got to pretend that he liked me better for a little while. i didn't have a cold though. put some whiskey in your coffee. no, wait, don't.

― scott seward (scott seward), Friday, 3 June 2005 17:18 (twenty-one years ago)

I just don't want to do anything careless or stupid.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Friday, 3 June 2005 17:18 (twenty-one years ago)

I got thrown into the deep end when Sarah was born. My wife's gall bladder went bad when the baby was about six weeks old, so I had to deal with things mostly-solo during surgery and recovery. Grandparents helped as much as they could, but it was still a wake-up call for me.

― Rock Hardy (Rock Hardy), Friday, 3 June 2005 17:19 (twenty-one years ago)

i have been rufus's full-time mom since he was infant, so it's a little different, i guess. maria was the one he didn't get to see as much. much to his dismay. he learned to get sick of my goofy face really early on.

― scott seward (scott seward), Friday, 3 June 2005 17:20 (twenty-one years ago)

Babies have emotion-sensors. Chill out and enjoy yourself, mind her fontanelle*, and IT WILL ALL BE OKAY.

*This was a joke.

― Rock Hardy (Rock Hardy), Friday, 3 June 2005 17:22 (twenty-one years ago)

In every picture of Charlotte that has been posted on ILX, she appears happy and well-behaved -- the perfect baby. All of these blood and poo incidents must be happening during the non-picture moments. There must be a correlation here.

Therefore, as long as you continue to take pictures of her and regularly post them to ILX, it will ensure that nothing ever goes wrong.

― MindInRewind (Barry Bruner), Friday, 3 June 2005 17:23 (twenty-one years ago)

Jeez, Rock Hardy, that sounds rough. Glad to hear you made it through.

We have no such problems, really. Charlotte is by and large and complete breeze when it comes to the travails of babydom. She cries and has trouble sleeping on occaission, but nothing out of the ordinary. My circumstances aren't dire at all, but I just don't want to fuck up or having something out of the ordinary occur on my watch.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Friday, 3 June 2005 17:23 (twenty-one years ago)

Charlotte is by and large and complete breeze

...by and large A complete breeze. sheesh.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Friday, 3 June 2005 17:24 (twenty-one years ago)

oh yeah, i forgot, right before maria was supposed to get home that time, rufus fell on the street and got all bloody cuz he split his lip. scared the hell out of me. i'd never seen my little one all bloody like that. but he was fine. he even mentioned it yesterday! kid has a crazy memory.

― scott seward (scott seward), Friday, 3 June 2005 17:27 (twenty-one years ago)

Alex, don't you usually have the overnight shift on Friday nights?

― Rock Hardy (Rock Hardy), Friday, 3 June 2005 17:41 (twenty-one years ago)

I used to work with quite a few single mums, and thinking about the fact that they'd have to go through that shit all the time has always given me a sense of perspective when I'm lone parenting. That said, I always seem to get ill as soon as N leaves town. I've got every faith that you'll be fine Alex. In fact, enjoy the conspiratorial aspect of getting a little uninterrupted Daddy-Daughter time. ;)

― Jetlag Willy (noodle vague), Friday, 3 June 2005 17:50 (twenty-one years ago)

charlotte will be in charge of the a.p. wire.

― scott seward (scott seward), Friday, 3 June 2005 17:51 (twenty-one years ago)

TEN APPLES DEFY PHYSICS BY BEING UP ON TOP

― Rock Hardy (Rock Hardy), Friday, 3 June 2005 18:12 (twenty-one years ago)

Maybe Nowell can come over and help babysit, Alex. Oh wait, she's in Hawaii, or so she says.

― k/l (Ken L), Friday, 3 June 2005 18:21 (twenty-one years ago)

Alex, don't you usually have the overnight shift on Friday nights?

I do, yes (what a good memory you've got), but I took tonight off.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Friday, 3 June 2005 19:15 (twenty-one years ago)

SCIENTISTS STUNNED BY GREEN EGGS AND HAM

― Rock Hardy (Rock Hardy), Friday, 3 June 2005 19:23 (twenty-one years ago)

You will be fine, nothing will go wrong and Chazz and her father will spend have such a lovely time that when Mum comes home, you will look up from your activities and say 'oh, is it that time already?'

I have spoken, so shall it be.

(Really, my fingers are crossed for you.)

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 3 June 2005 19:26 (twenty-one years ago)

Can I make everyone puke by saying that the first time I looked after Ava for an entire day by myself it was ace? We sang along to The Mamas & The Papas and Music For The Amorphous Body Study Center, she had a nice bath and a nice poo and had the good sense to keep those two activities separate, I pushed her up Highfield Hill and the drone of the traffic from Church Road lulled her to sleep. She was in her jammies and sacked out by the time Mum got home.

Ava's done the entire-contents-of-her-stomach-in-yr-lap thing but she was wearing her Super Hurlers T-shirt, so I was asking for it.

― Michael Jones (MichaelJ), Friday, 3 June 2005 19:48 (twenty-one years ago)

I keep forgetting to mention this on the various parenting/expecting threads, but Pete Seeger's Children's Concert at Town Hall is the most fun album for kids ever.

― Rock Hardy (Rock Hardy), Friday, 3 June 2005 19:51 (twenty-one years ago)

I'm home all weekend with two kids while my wife is away and the youngest lad has THE POX (chickenpox, that is). We're coping so far but it's early days...

― Onimo (GerryNemo), Friday, 3 June 2005 20:15 (twenty-one years ago)

Ooh, that's rough Omino...good luck with that. Aye yai yai.

Well, day one is down. Just put her to bed with suprisingly little fuss (i'm probably jinxing myself by saying that). So far, so good.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Friday, 3 June 2005 21:44 (twenty-one years ago)

The greatest salve of solo parenting is keeping score, knowing that your spouse then owes you a free weekend in return. (That's what motivates me, although I'm in Scott Seward's situation. And since we're expecting #3 in December, I think the solo weekends will be much harder to pull off after that.)

― don weiner (don weiner), Friday, 3 June 2005 22:10 (twenty-one years ago)

knowing that your spouse then owes you a free weekend in return

This is true, but I think this renders us even for my five day jaunt to the UK back in February to see Killing Joke (although, her mother came and stayed during that spell, so that seems hardly fair).

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Friday, 3 June 2005 22:15 (twenty-one years ago)

Day two: progressing. She was up at 5:40. Cold is worsening. Ugh.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Saturday, 4 June 2005 14:35 (twenty-one years ago)

Skipping 24 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

What do you mean you miss the days? What's the shelflife on that thing?

― k/l (Ken L), Monday, 6 June 2005 18:33 (twenty-one years ago)

My wife went across the country for a conference leaving me and oliver solo for 5 whole days, at 6 months. It was exhausting. Plus, while she was away the kid got sick and we had to do dr. visits and the whole nine. I surprised myself a little at how much I missed the wife, her help but also just her. (Normally I'd be glad to have her back but happy that I had the alone time.) But really, when all is said and done, you may realize how awesome a parent you actually are despite the common anxieties and concerns to the contrary.

― mcd (mcd), Monday, 6 June 2005 19:22 (twenty-one years ago)

What do you mean you miss the days? What's the shelflife on that thing?

Well, there'll come a point after a couple of months when your little person will no longer regard the `Saucer with affection, but rather for what it is ----> a device that severely limits his/her ambulatory options. As such, he or she will invariably stage a high volume protest each and every time you attempt to lower him or her into the `Saucer, rending its place in your home somewhat moot.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Monday, 6 June 2005 19:25 (twenty-one years ago)

rending

rendering

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Monday, 6 June 2005 19:26 (twenty-one years ago)

Exersaucers rule, especially that 3 week or so period when they will be happy in them for 40 minutes at a time. But it sucks when they puke/spill/shit themselves in them. Especially when they get the "crawling turd" syndrome (when it crawls upward in the diaper/possibly into the shirt area from being in the Exersaucer too long.)

― don weiner (don weiner), Monday, 6 June 2005 19:44 (twenty-one years ago)

A needlessly detailed description, but accurate.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Monday, 6 June 2005 19:46 (twenty-one years ago)

Shit-up-the-back we call it.

― mcd (mcd), Monday, 6 June 2005 19:46 (twenty-one years ago)

five months pass...

ARRRGH! REVIVE

So, it's happening again.My wife is going away, and leaving me with Charlotte for the weekend. Trouble is -- now it's Charlotte that's sick (ear infection, on-again/off-again temperature and a hacking cough). I have to give her meds twice a day (with a dropper....which is messy and no fun for either of us). It's going to suck. Plus, I'm now going to miss Bauhaus on Saturday night, as I don't think leaving poor sick Charlotte with a sitter is a good idea.

FUCK FUCKIN' FUCKITY FUCK

― Alex in NYC....Prisoner of Panicky Parent Planet (vassifer), Friday, 11 November 2005 03:44 (twenty years ago)

I'd say "take her with you!" but um, no thats bad. :(

― Trayce (trayce), Friday, 11 November 2005 03:48 (twenty years ago)

FUCK!

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Friday, 11 November 2005 17:56 (twenty years ago)

..was just informed that the wife will won't be back until "probably quite late" on Sunday night.

Just had to tel friend with Bauhaus tickets that it's not looking at all promising.

FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK!

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Friday, 11 November 2005 17:57 (twenty years ago)

Dude, I feel your pain. Glad mine's almost grown up.

― I do feel guilty for getting any perverse amusement out of it (Rock Hardy), Friday, 11 November 2005 18:18 (twenty years ago)

Okay, so I just spent a fucking hour getting Charlotte down to sleep (it was quite sad, she kept looking around for my wife and trotting towards the door as if expecting her to come in at any moment). In any case, she's finally asleep. As if on cue, some COCK NAZI'S BMW directly five flights down from our living room window is blaring its irritating car alarm at top volume. I cannot put into words how pissed off I'm going to be if this wakes up Charlotte. That said, I neglected to empty the "used" diaper dispenser this evening. I have it's full sickly contents at ready. I could totally coat the car in question. It'd be like shooting fish in a barrell. Do I?

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Saturday, 12 November 2005 00:47 (twenty years ago)

Ah, never mind. It stopped.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Saturday, 12 November 2005 00:48 (twenty years ago)

do it anyway.

please.

take photos.

― sunny successor (he hates my guts, we had a fight) (katharine), Saturday, 12 November 2005 01:00 (twenty years ago)

Maybe you can get some no1z3 dud3s to come babysit.

-- Jordan (jordan...) (webmail), June 3rd, 2005 1:49 PM. (Jordan) (link)

Ian's girlfriend aka DAEREST RECORDSTORE GIRL is a good babysitter!

― Jdubz (ex machina), Saturday, 12 November 2005 01:15 (twenty years ago)

she's the record store girl!? hot.

― sunny successor (he hates my guts, we had a fight) (katharine), Saturday, 12 November 2005 01:21 (twenty years ago)

SHE IS ALSO IN AN INDIE ROCK BAND.

There are two RECORD STORE GIRLS fwiw

― Jdubz (ex machina), Saturday, 12 November 2005 01:27 (twenty years ago)

There are many many many more than two. Call them! Just step outside your door and cry out "RECORD STORE GIRL!!!! HELP MEEEEEE!!!"

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Saturday, 12 November 2005 02:15 (twenty years ago)

There really isn't anything more sickeningly insipid that fuckin' "Barney"....especially at six in the goddamn morning. Fuck that purple dinosaur.

Elmo's new picnic either (that fuckin' laugh? Are you kidding me? It's more grating than the fuckin' Black Eyed Peas).

I dig the Teletubbies and the BooBahs....prinicipally because they don't even try to be even remotely educational and are just plain silly and weird. Dig that.

Thomas the Tank Engine is at least well done. It shits all over Barney and fuckin' Elmo.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Sunday, 13 November 2005 13:22 (twenty years ago)

Actually, the Backyardigans are pretty entertaining. Dora the Explorer, meanwhile, can go eat a dick.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Sunday, 13 November 2005 13:23 (twenty years ago)

Someone....please come and kill me.

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Sunday, 13 November 2005 13:24 (twenty years ago)

You poor baby. Aren't all the PeeWee's Playhouse episodes on DVD now? Get it messengered over.

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Sunday, 13 November 2005 14:41 (twenty years ago)

I was thinking about starting a 'kids programs: s/d' thread!

― teeny (teeny), Sunday, 13 November 2005 15:41 (twenty years ago)

so was i ! i don't know why i didn't. i am an expert by now.

― scott seward (scott seward), Sunday, 13 November 2005 16:02 (twenty years ago)

Do it now!
TIVO is going to be great for parents. The clamor of ads is so depressing. So much worse than the insipid pap of the programming. Even adults, when they mute the volume, still stare at the ads in a stupid trance, because they don't want to miss any of the program. Ugh.
And the kiddie products!
This is their subliminal message:
Boy Stuff: I WILL KILL EVERYTHING IN MY PATH!!!!!!
Girl Stuff: I AM A HUMAN SACRIFICE! FUCK ME AND RIP OUT MY LIVER!!! SEE MY TENDER UNDERBELLY???
Oh course, my boys had all that boy stuff. Parents always relent. The kids wear you down, and the social ostracism that an out-of-the-loop kid endures is worse than the fascist brainwashing of the horrible products.

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Sunday, 13 November 2005 16:12 (twenty years ago)

Hey Scott, you gonna bring those bad boyz over? I'll bring over the laptop again. You can continue posting!

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Sunday, 13 November 2005 16:13 (twenty years ago)

to the middle road house? maybe. maria has a meeting at four near there. maybe we should all come over before then and hang out. she could go to her meeting and then pick us up from there.

sorry, off-topic. the cold stuff sucks alex! i have had a constant cold for the last month cuzza the kids. we are a drippy bunch.

I fuckin' hate the wiggles! (rufus loves them though.)

― scott seward (scott seward), Sunday, 13 November 2005 16:17 (twenty years ago)

My daughter still hates "The Little Mermaid" because of how bad it scared her when she was little. Save that one for 5+ yrs.!

― I do feel guilty for getting any perverse amusement out of it (Rock Hardy), Sunday, 13 November 2005 16:24 (twenty years ago)

i like most of the pbs stuff. arthur, buster, clifford. that's mostly what i put on for rufus. i don't like maya & miguel or cyberchase though. or barnie (duh). rufus likes animal shows. there are a couple of good ones on sunday mornings. one with mariet hartley and another one. can't remember what they are called though. we really only watch stuff in the mornings and that's it for the t.v. although rufus did go thru a hardcore dukes of hazard repeat phase. 7:00 p.m. on CMT. that's actually how we started getting him into telling time! he always wanted to know when the duke boys were gonna be on and we taught him about clocks.

― scott seward (scott seward), Sunday, 13 November 2005 16:25 (twenty years ago)

rufus is almost 3 and the only time he got scared by anything was when i was watching spy kids 2 on t.v. the skeletons and monsters freaked him out a little. we have been renting stuff from the library and he really liked Monsters Inc. and The Cat In The Hat movie. I was worried that they might freak him a little, but he was fine. he mostly likes videos about trucks and cars, etc.

― scott seward (scott seward), Sunday, 13 November 2005 16:28 (twenty years ago)

oh man age 2-3 TV was all about BLUES CLUES round here. twas never the same after STEVE left the show (sigh)...

the sickest I've ever been as an adult has been from kids infections

alex get behind some COLD-EZE zinc lozenges

― m coleman (lovebug starski), Sunday, 13 November 2005 17:12 (twenty years ago)

Ha, lovebug, we've got some BLUES CLUES fans over here, and every time the other guy, JOE?, is on, mrs. L says "the show was much better when STEVE was on it." Apparently the theme song had to be modified to explain the changed nature of ownership w.r.t. BLUE and THE HOST.

Alex, I feel your pain. Mrs. L was really sick from last weekend until last night, as were the babies at various times throughout the week, and I ended up staying home Monday and Tuesday and luckily getting to take the skeleton day on Friday. Luckily we all made it through in one piece.

Guys, when the smoke clears I still would like to do a Dads of NY FAP- gypsy mothra should come too. Actually, everbody else should come, it just sounds better for getting out of the house if it is an official Dads FAP.

― k/l (Ken L), Sunday, 13 November 2005 17:28 (twenty years ago)

rufus loves blue's clues too. we read the books all the time.

― scott seward (scott seward), Sunday, 13 November 2005 17:56 (twenty years ago)

There's a great chapter on Sesame Street vs Blue's Clues in "The Tipping Point," where Malcolm Gladwell discusses a show designed like Laugh-In vs one of nothing but repetition.

― kingfish cold slither (kingfish 2.0), Sunday, 13 November 2005 18:08 (twenty years ago)

Oh yeah, the hard drive got sick too and the computer wouldn't boot, but with a little bit of work I managed to get the unbacked-up baby photos off of it, although one of the babies woke up while I was doing this and then wouldn't bo back to sleep.

― k/l (Ken L), Sunday, 13 November 2005 18:10 (twenty years ago)

"Make playdough for her! Better than shop-bought toxic stuff"

dude, if playdough was toxic id have been dead 50 times over by the age of two. its tasty stuff. same goes for perkins paste and scented novelty erasers, preferably in the shape of a hamburger, hotdog or miss strawberry shortcake.

― sunny successor (he hates my guts, we had a fight) (katharine), Sunday, 13 November 2005 19:27 (twenty years ago)

My two cents on children's programming.

Guys, when the smoke clears I still would like to do a Dads of NY FAP

This sounds good!!!

― Alex in NYC (vassifer), Sunday, 13 November 2005 19:28 (twenty years ago)

I was chatting with my mom about kids' programming and she said that when we finally did get a TV, she would take me out of the house every saturday morning so I wouldn't 'discover' the cartoons!

― teeny (teeny), Sunday, 13 November 2005 19:39 (twenty years ago)

I would definitely do a NYC dad FAP. Except I'll almost inevitably be working whenever you do it, because I am always working. But start a thread if you set it up, I'll try to come.

― gypsy mothra (gypsy mothra), Sunday, 13 November 2005 19:43 (twenty years ago)

Elmo's voice is far and away the most grating sound that can be subjected to one's ears first thing in the morning. When I hear that furry, crimson gremlin chuckle, I want to plunge screwdrivers into my skull to quell the piercing tintamar. It is quite inarguably the voice of Satan

Alex man...seriously, I heart you....

― M@tt He1geson (Matt Helgeson), Sunday, 13 November 2005 19:43 (twenty years ago)

I wish there was some way of getting a hold of original, early 70s Sesame Street. You know, with the psychedelic cartoons and stuff. That shit was great!

"One two three FOUR FIVE, six seveneight NINE TEN, eleven twelve!"

― Trayce (trayce), Sunday, 13 November 2005 20:34 (twenty years ago)

Ah yes. The heydey, if you ask me. The animators for that show are the best, always have been the best.

― molery, Sunday, 13 November 2005 20:38 (twenty years ago)

I was chatting with my mom about kids' programming and she said that when we finally did get a TV, she would take me out of the house every saturday morning so I wouldn't 'discover' the cartoons!

When I was four, I discovered a horror program - an old geezer bleeding and spinning on a pedestal - on morning telly! It completely freaked me out! I still remember shouting from the top of the stairs at my mum who was in the shop downstairs. Fucking weirdest thing I ever saw... until seeing a women receiving sex from two men at the same time on telly at the age of 12. Now I get paranoid even thinking of my kid watching telly, let alone horror and porn. hah.

― Nathalie is in Da Base II Dark (stevie nixed), Sunday, 13 November 2005 20:43 (twenty years ago)

i grew up watching Insight on sunday mornings, the freakiest christian morality plays that the 70's could devise, and i grew up fine! kinda.

― scott seward (scott seward), Sunday, 13 November 2005 20:46 (twenty years ago)

The Backyardigans is on as I type. I got two crazed Backyardigans fans who jump up and wave their hands in the air like they just don't care whenever they hear the theme music.

What about you, Mark - can you ever get out for a FAP?

― k/l (Ken L), Sunday, 13 November 2005 22:36 (twenty years ago)

Backyardigans is pretty cute...i like that show.

― M@tt He1geson (Matt Helgeson), Sunday, 13 November 2005 23:00 (twenty years ago)

xpost

yea! mid week t/w/t aftwrk usually works best for me.

― m coleman (lovebug starski), Monday, 14 November 2005 11:52 (twenty years ago)

the only weekend morning shows i can remember watching as a kid were 'the hour of power' and 'english for new australians' which delighted my father: 'well, she is a new australian!'. other than those two i used to own a blinky bill tape that, im told, id put in my tape recorder, turn it up to ten and hit play every saturday morning at 6am.

weekday afternoon shows were more my thing - skippy, if only to jump around like a kangaroo to the theme song; the banana splits; hr pufnstuf and sigmund the seamonster. i think simon townsends wonderworld came later. poor woodrow.

― sunny successor (he hates my guts, we had a fight) (katharine), Monday, 14 November 2005 17:50 (twenty years ago)

two weeks pass...

We've got some serious Elmomaniacs over here- it's like they're queued up outside the Elmo Plaza and listening on the transistor radio to Elmurray the K.

Alex and Mark, are you gonna try to go teh JBR FAP next week?

― k/l (Ken L), Saturday, 3 December 2005 20:42 (twenty years ago)

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