signs you are not yet a yuppie

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1.) you are looking for a pot holder, realize you don't have any, and use a sock instead.

― strng hlkngtn, Friday, 3 June 2005 21:16 (twenty-one years ago)

I salute your use of "yet" in the thread title.

― KKSF, Friday, 3 June 2005 21:19 (twenty-one years ago)

2.) you iron your clothes on the back of an r. kellu happy people/u saved me foamboard advertisement from your workplace

xpost: i am ready for it

― strng hlkngtn, Friday, 3 June 2005 21:20 (twenty-one years ago)

if your doing ironing you're a full lap ahead of me

― g e o f f (gcannon), Friday, 3 June 2005 21:22 (twenty-one years ago)

3.) your wine cellar is actually a box on top of the fridge

― strng hlkngtn, Friday, 3 June 2005 21:23 (twenty-one years ago)

4). Your car grows several kinds of fungal life, inside and out.

― Aimless (Aimless), Friday, 3 June 2005 21:27 (twenty-one years ago)

4) your breakast is a bowl of mashed-up almond cookies from the dollar store (with non-dairy vanilla almond milk from trader joe's, which i guess cancels the "not a yuppie" part out).

― to let - flats (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 3 June 2005 21:28 (twenty-one years ago)

5)You refer to the taqueria calendar on your fridge as "emerging local art".

― KKSF, Friday, 3 June 2005 21:29 (twenty-one years ago)

6) despite reality, you want to become a yuppie

― Community Cornerstone (deangulberry), Friday, 3 June 2005 21:31 (twenty-one years ago)

7) the only underwear and socks you own are the ones your mom bought you for Christmas

― Bryan (Bryan), Friday, 3 June 2005 21:31 (twenty-one years ago)

(Speaking of which, a guy ran onto BART the other day and threatened to shoot all of the "Oprah Winfrey and Donald Trump motherfuckers" on the train because we had dared to ride through West Oakland which was apparently "his house". I looked down at my ripped old jeans and wished I was a Donald Trump or Oprah Winfrey motherfucker!)

― KKSF, Friday, 3 June 2005 21:32 (twenty-one years ago)

That guy's house sucks.

― Community Cornerstone (deangulberry), Friday, 3 June 2005 21:33 (twenty-one years ago)

you don't get that in Colindale.

― Sociah T Azzahole (blueski), Friday, 3 June 2005 21:33 (twenty-one years ago)

That guy's house sucks.

hahaha!

― KKSF, Friday, 3 June 2005 21:34 (twenty-one years ago)

8.) You manage to shop for groceries without using your cell phone.

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Friday, 3 June 2005 21:34 (twenty-one years ago)

9) your neighbors apartment is the local weed spot

― strng hlkngtn, Friday, 3 June 2005 21:34 (twenty-one years ago)

jess, you're losing your touch.

― Homosexual II (Homosexual II), Friday, 3 June 2005 21:36 (twenty-one years ago)

haha @ #8

― oops (Oops), Friday, 3 June 2005 21:37 (twenty-one years ago)

10) you haven't lost your touch entirely

― strng hlkngtn, Friday, 3 June 2005 21:38 (twenty-one years ago)

11. you drink 24 oz. cans of Old Milwaukee

― dan m (OutDatWay), Friday, 3 June 2005 21:43 (twenty-one years ago)

12. i'm probably the closest to actually having the things that makes one a yuppie (suv, loft, wife), but FUCK SHAVING AND TUCKING YOUR SHIRT IN

― [that bastard] jaxon (jaxon), Friday, 3 June 2005 21:48 (twenty-one years ago)

13. i get called a terrorist when i go to yuppie bars

― [that bastard] jaxon (jaxon), Friday, 3 June 2005 21:49 (twenty-one years ago)

tucking my shirt in was a big step, i think. that may be why i grew the beard.

― strng hlkngtn, Friday, 3 June 2005 21:49 (twenty-one years ago)

Having a wife makes you a yuppie??

(though I did buy mine from a warehouse in Emeryville)

― KKSF, Friday, 3 June 2005 21:49 (twenty-one years ago)

Jason why would anyone shave their shirt?

― M. White (Miguelito), Friday, 3 June 2005 21:49 (twenty-one years ago)

hairshirt

― KKSF, Friday, 3 June 2005 21:50 (twenty-one years ago)

hairshirt

xpost FUCK

― strng hlkngtn, Friday, 3 June 2005 21:50 (twenty-one years ago)

You realise your car has gone round the world 3 times.

― Onimo (GerryNemo), Friday, 3 June 2005 21:55 (twenty-one years ago)

http://english1.people.com.cn:80/200309/04/images/car-boat.jpg

― [that bastard] jaxon (jaxon), Friday, 3 June 2005 22:02 (twenty-one years ago)

You sleep on a green mat in a room with 18 other crackheads/junkies/alcoholics. Who snore!

― Aaron A., Friday, 3 June 2005 23:04 (twenty-one years ago)

16) Your 401(k) is a jar of pennies.

― milozauckerman (miloaukerman), Friday, 3 June 2005 23:44 (twenty-one years ago)

17) Your savings is the spare change around your room. Mostly pennies.

― Candicissima (candicissima), Friday, 3 June 2005 23:52 (twenty-one years ago)

Keep hoping, ilxors!

― Hurting (Hurting), Saturday, 4 June 2005 00:01 (twenty-one years ago)

18.

― Ian John50n (orion), Saturday, 4 June 2005 00:05 (twenty-one years ago)

Ironing?

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, 4 June 2005 00:10 (twenty-one years ago)

you keep your beers in your stomach and your empties on the table

― charltonlido (gareth), Saturday, 4 June 2005 00:12 (twenty-one years ago)

I am so totally a yuppie. I gave up on denying it years ago. I like the health insurance!

― gypsy mothra (gypsy mothra), Saturday, 4 June 2005 02:54 (twenty-one years ago)

16) Your 401(k) is a jar of pennies.

you have a jar of pennies?!? I'm so coming to rob you dude. . .

19). You Coinstar your jars of pennies to buy tampons.

― Miss Misery (thatgirl), Saturday, 4 June 2005 02:56 (twenty-one years ago)

20) Your "kitchen" is an electric wok, a crock pot and a George Foreman Grill.

― Hurting (Hurting), Saturday, 4 June 2005 03:03 (twenty-one years ago)

21) You own one "nice" piece of furniture from Ikea.

― Hurting (Hurting), Saturday, 4 June 2005 03:15 (twenty-one years ago)

22) The classiest thing in your living room is a dead houseplant whose sad, ashy branches are strung with numerous pairs of slutty lace underwear.

― kirsten (kirsten), Saturday, 4 June 2005 03:19 (twenty-one years ago)

yuppie? is it 1985 already?

― sunny successor (katharine), Saturday, 4 June 2005 03:24 (twenty-one years ago)

The classiest thing in your living room is a dead houseplant whose sad, ashy branches are strung with numerous pairs of slutty lace underwear.

Give it a pretentious title and call it a sculpture.

― milozauckerman (miloaukerman), Saturday, 4 June 2005 03:28 (twenty-one years ago)

I have a parent who calls themselves a "yuppie" even though they are 57 years old. They say that the word is interchangable with "baby boomer" though I say that the acronym is YOUNG urban professional.

Hell, even Michael J. Fox is no longer a yuppie.

― Pleasant Plains /// (Pleasant Plains ///), Saturday, 4 June 2005 04:33 (twenty-one years ago)

23) you've eaten nothing but pizza for the past two days

24) you dont put clothes in the closet but leave em in a two foot pile at the bottom of your bed

― Michael B, Sunday, 5 June 2005 14:37 (twenty-one years ago)

25) Jeff Foxworthy is your new hero

― Nellie (nellskies), Sunday, 5 June 2005 16:15 (twenty-one years ago)

26) you buy soup in tins not cartons

― charltonlido (gareth), Sunday, 5 June 2005 16:26 (twenty-one years ago)

What kind of soup is sold in carton?

― Chris H. (chrisherbert), Sunday, 5 June 2005 17:25 (twenty-one years ago)

http://www.newcoventgardenfood.com/range/parsnip.html

― charltonlido (gareth), Sunday, 5 June 2005 17:31 (twenty-one years ago)

you 'summer' on your fire escape

― maura (maura), Sunday, 5 June 2005 18:00 (twenty-one years ago)

28.) you patch up a hole in your bedroom window with excess fabolous posters from work.

― strng hlkngtn, Sunday, 5 June 2005 18:04 (twenty-one years ago)

29) your "summer wardrobe" consists of the same ratty shorts-that-used-to-be-pants and low top converse you've owned since college.

― strng hlkngtn, Sunday, 5 June 2005 18:05 (twenty-one years ago)

30) Your computer and bed and tv are in the same room

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Sunday, 5 June 2005 20:31 (twenty-one years ago)

31) Gas card.

― Jarlr'mai (jarlrmai), Sunday, 5 June 2005 20:32 (twenty-one years ago)

your lambskin seat covers are hand-stitched in cahors, not toulouse

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Sunday, 5 June 2005 20:43 (twenty-one years ago)

i mean, fellas, we've all been there, am i right?

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Sunday, 5 June 2005 20:45 (twenty-one years ago)

what?

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Sunday, 5 June 2005 20:49 (twenty-one years ago)

You sleep on a green mat in a room with 18 other crackheads/junkies/alcoholics. Who snore!

-- Aaron A. (__...), June 4th, 2005.

You live in The Warehouse in Philadelphia?

― Hurting (Hurting), Monday, 6 June 2005 03:57 (twenty-one years ago)

you concoct a delightful ganache out of vodka and jell-o chocolate pudding mix.

― metal assembly (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 10 June 2005 02:44 (twenty years ago)

Your 401(k) is a jar of pennies.

i swear, i read this as "jar of penises."

― jaymc (jaymc), Friday, 10 June 2005 02:49 (twenty years ago)

Probably get you about as far :)

― You fondle my trigger then you blame my gun / Kate (papa november), Friday, 10 June 2005 02:58 (twenty years ago)

http://www.erosblog.com/penis-of-rasputin-02.jpg

― Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Friday, 10 June 2005 03:05 (twenty years ago)

That's a useful stock photo

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Friday, 10 June 2005 03:05 (twenty years ago)

I thought so.

― Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Friday, 10 June 2005 03:05 (twenty years ago)

You grow your own weed but you're not really sure if it's weed

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Friday, 10 June 2005 03:06 (twenty years ago)

rah-rah-rasputeeeeen!

― metal assembly (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 10 June 2005 03:14 (twenty years ago)

I keep staring at that photo. Is that... is that an elbow? That man's penis was so big it needed an elbow!

― Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Friday, 10 June 2005 03:16 (twenty years ago)

What's Rosanna Arquette gonna do with it?

― nickn (nickn), Friday, 10 June 2005 05:04 (twenty years ago)

35) You haven't bought a single piece of furniture in your life, and for four years you used a carboard box full of old clothes as your bedside table, until it was replaced by an old drawer left to your current apartment by a former flatmate.

― Tuomas (Tuomas), Friday, 10 June 2005 09:25 (twenty years ago)

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