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Does it really matter? Are women really disappointed when they finally get to go to bed with someone and discover he's not hung like a donkey? Could a small dick really be a source of major dissatisfaction if you like the guy in all other respects? Um, a shy friend asked me to post this thread, you understand...

― Rafael S., Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:08 (twenty years ago)

Surely we've talked about this before.

― Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:12 (twenty years ago)

Vagina size: Does it really matter? Are men really disappointed when they finally get to go to bed with someone and discover she's not tight like a Ziploc bag? Could a loose pussy really be a source of major dissatisfaction if you like the girl in all other respects? Um, a shy friend asked me to post this thread, you understand...

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:14 (twenty years ago)

lol

― battlingspacemonkey (battlingspacemonkey), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:15 (twenty years ago)

Could a loose pussy really be a source of major dissatisfaction if you like the girl in all other respects?

Yeah.

So that should answer all questions.

― Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:15 (twenty years ago)

There's a little something called oral sex for the less-endowed. Mind you, the vagina on average is usually only about seven inches in length, and the first four inches or so is where all the sensation is felt.

― Ian Riese-Moraine has been xeroxed into a conduit! (Eastern Mantra), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:21 (twenty years ago)

So tell me, is there still some kind of, you know, "friction"? Or is it like throwing a pencil down a hallway?

― Stewie is my hero (nickalicious), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:25 (twenty years ago)

I most definitely like a big cock. Sorry.

On the other hand, sexual preferences vary a hell of a lot and not all women care that much about size.

― Melinda_, Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:27 (twenty years ago)

Sometimes I wish I was gay, just because I love to say "cock".

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:27 (twenty years ago)

Or is it like throwing a pencil down a hallway?

Hot dog down a hallway, nicka, hot dog. A small one.

― giboyeux (skowly), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:28 (twenty years ago)

There's a little something called oral sex for the less-endowed.

This is not a cure-all.

― Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:28 (twenty years ago)

HOTDOG

― I STAND CORRECTED (nickalicious), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:30 (twenty years ago)

I've always preferred the "glass of warm water" analogy.

― Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:31 (twenty years ago)

Please elucidate.

― M. White (Miguelito), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:32 (twenty years ago)

(easiest derail ever)

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:33 (twenty years ago)

Like sticking your dick in a glass of warm water. Upside: you last forever.

― Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:33 (twenty years ago)

Labia hotdog! The little brother of titfuck the ass! Yes! HAHA! xxxpost

There's a little something called oral sex for the less-endowed.

This is not a cure-all.
Oh, I'm sorry, I wouldn't know! It was a matter of conjecture...

― Ian Riese-Moraine has been xeroxed into a conduit! (Eastern Mantra), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:33 (twenty years ago)

Erm, my triple-x post was actually a quadruple x-post.

― Ian Riese-Moraine has been xeroxed into a conduit! (Eastern Mantra), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:35 (twenty years ago)

Ian, I think all that RYL listening is getting to you.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:35 (twenty years ago)

Rafael, jokes aside, I know this can be a painful subject. For a long time I didn't have a good concept of how big was big and how small was small, so I agonized over this a lot when I was younger. Anyway, I've found that this issue varies for women -- for some, too big is actually much more of a problem than too small (at least that's what they tell me ...). I'm not going to ask you to post your size, but you can probably find info through Google on what's actually considered "average," and keep in mind that since it's an average, there's a decent range on either side of that that's still "functional." Anyway, I doubt most women, if they really want to be with you, will make it a deciding factor, so don't sweat it.

― Hurting (Hurting), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:37 (twenty years ago)

i wouldn't know

― Homosexual II (Homosexual II), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:38 (twenty years ago)

Ian, I think all that RYL listening is getting to you.

You're probably right. And I still don't have the box set because I'm incredibly fucking broke from my Orlando sojourn!

― Ian Riese-Moraine has been xeroxed into a conduit! (Eastern Mantra), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:41 (twenty years ago)

Are men really disappointed when they finally get to go to bed with someone and discover she's not tight like a Ziploc bag? Could a loose pussy really be a source of major dissatisfaction if you like the girl in all other respects?
But, there are exercises for that!

To the question at hand, it's not about the size of your boat, it's about the motion of the ocean (or whatever). If I had to choose though, I'd rather have a yacht than a sailboat.

― Candicissima (candicissima), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:49 (twenty years ago)

Like sticking your dick in a glass of warm water. Upside: you last forever.

Downside: You end up peeing

― M. White (Miguelito), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:50 (twenty years ago)

Sometimes I wish I was gay, just because I love to say "cock".

I don't know why you have to be gay to say "cock." Surely you can say it in reference to your own? I do this all the time! Er.

― jaymc (jaymc), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:51 (twenty years ago)

JAYMC HAS AN ENORMOUS COCK.

Like that.

― Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:52 (twenty years ago)

Ok, that was kinda gay.

― Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:52 (twenty years ago)

Upside down: your lap gets wet.

― C J (C J), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:52 (twenty years ago)

But, there are exercises for that!

There are exercises for men, too! And pills, and vacuum pumps and etc etc etc.

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:52 (twenty years ago)

(xpost) EXACTLY.

― jaymc (jaymc), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:53 (twenty years ago)

I don't like the word "enormous," though, I've decided.

― jaymc (jaymc), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:53 (twenty years ago)

"Grandiose" is more your speed?

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:53 (twenty years ago)

xpost An exercise to make your dick grow? I'm probably going regret this but: link?

― Candicissima (candicissima), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:54 (twenty years ago)

As I've been told, girth is a more important factor than length.

― elmo (allocryptic), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:54 (twenty years ago)

GIGANTIC
GIGANTIC
GIGANTIC
A BIG BIG LOVE

― Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:55 (twenty years ago)

I'm not providing a link as it would involve a bad google search to do while at work. The process is called... jelking, I think?

(Spam has so much to answer for in terms of my poor, tattered innocence.)

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:56 (twenty years ago)

Finally, Rafael, what's the use in worrying about something that you can do, essentially, nothing about? If the size of your cock is a deal-breaker, she wasn't for you, and probably for the better. There are lots of ways for people to get each other off and discovering them is what a relationship is all about.

― M. White (Miguelito), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:56 (twenty years ago)

If the size of your cock is a deal-breaker

As opposed to the size of a deal being a cockbreaker.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:57 (twenty years ago)

There are lots of ways for people to get each other off and discovering them is what a relationship is all about.

"Now, amortize the interest. Yeah, that's it... AMORTIZE THE INTEREST, YOU HOT BITCH! OH GOD, I'M CALCULATING THE PMI! OOOOOOOOOOOOH!"

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:59 (twenty years ago)

Accountant sex!

― Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Thursday, 30 June 2005 14:59 (twenty years ago)

I have to be honest here, a guy with a 3 inch cock isn't going to be able to do the same as a guy with a 6 inch cock. So depending on your size, the women in question may or may not be satisfied. If she is unhappy about it, then she is not for you. If she can deal with it then it's all good.

― PinXorchiXoR (Pinkpanther), Thursday, 30 June 2005 15:00 (twenty years ago)

On the other hand, if you have two three inch cocks, you can get a job in fetish porn.

― M. White (Miguelito), Thursday, 30 June 2005 15:01 (twenty years ago)

yeah, it seems that this matters to more women than you'd think. But if it makes you feel any better, every size-queeen I've ever known has had a somewhat skewed and immature attitude towards sexuality/ relationships.

(unless you've got, like, a really, really tiny cock)

― jen&tonics, Thursday, 30 June 2005 15:02 (twenty years ago)

There are lots of ways for people to get each other off and discovering them is what a relationship is all about.

"Ann Coulter taking it up the ass" to thread!

― Ian Riese-Moraine has been xeroxed into a conduit! (Eastern Mantra), Thursday, 30 June 2005 15:04 (twenty years ago)

But if it makes you feel any better, every size-queeen I've ever known has had a somewhat skewed and immature attitude towards sexuality/ relationships.

― Candicissima (candicissima), Thursday, 30 June 2005 15:05 (twenty years ago)

Coulter can go fuck Ewoks as far as I'm concerned.

― M. White (Miguelito), Thursday, 30 June 2005 15:05 (twenty years ago)

You and this Ewok-fucking business...

― jaymc (jaymc), Thursday, 30 June 2005 15:06 (twenty years ago)

They're like midget hippies but more intelligible.

― M. White (Miguelito), Thursday, 30 June 2005 15:08 (twenty years ago)

So it really would be a punishment for her.

― M. White (Miguelito), Thursday, 30 June 2005 15:09 (twenty years ago)

Much as I expected. Thread dominated by guys, who offer jokes and varying degrees of support. The few women who turn up unanimously say they prefer a big dick.

Oh well.

― Rafael S., Thursday, 30 June 2005 15:09 (twenty years ago)

Skipping 139 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

Imagine the slo-mo replays!

― n/a (Nick A.), Thursday, 30 June 2005 20:54 (twenty years ago)

Use lube would be the equivalent of the spitball!

― n/a (Nick A.), Thursday, 30 June 2005 20:55 (twenty years ago)

Imagine the steroid abuse!

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Thursday, 30 June 2005 20:55 (twenty years ago)

Imagine the weighing-in.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 30 June 2005 20:55 (twenty years ago)

"And the Russians have been accused of stuffing their nutsacks with steroids..."

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 30 June 2005 20:55 (twenty years ago)

Bah xpost.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 30 June 2005 20:56 (twenty years ago)

Only one thing could make this idea better: roller skates.

― Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Thursday, 30 June 2005 20:56 (twenty years ago)

What would the slang terms for this new sport be? The equivalent of 'air ball' or 'no harm, no foul'?

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 30 June 2005 20:56 (twenty years ago)

Color commentator Ron Jeremy.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 30 June 2005 20:56 (twenty years ago)

Rollerdick fencing? What are you people smoking?

― M. White (Miguelito), Thursday, 30 June 2005 20:57 (twenty years ago)

When epee battles saber.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 30 June 2005 20:57 (twenty years ago)

Curses! Foiled again.

― M. White (Miguelito), Thursday, 30 June 2005 20:58 (twenty years ago)

Bruce Dickinson's skill at fencing and castrato wail both explained at once.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 30 June 2005 20:59 (twenty years ago)

The fancy plural of penis is penes.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Thursday, 30 June 2005 20:59 (twenty years ago)

Color commentator

Yes, to lighten things up a bit. The other commentator would be an ex-coach and talk very technically and make astute observations about the technique and finesse of this noble sport. Ron Jeremy would make dick jokes.

― Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Thursday, 30 June 2005 20:59 (twenty years ago)

"And today on the Tour de Penes..."

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 30 June 2005 21:00 (twenty years ago)

What kind of pasta did you say that was?

― M. White (Miguelito), Thursday, 30 June 2005 21:00 (twenty years ago)

Alfredo.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 30 June 2005 21:00 (twenty years ago)

Bring Me the "Head" of Alfredo Garcia

― jaymc (jaymc), Thursday, 30 June 2005 21:01 (twenty years ago)

I kinda feel like the demiurge . . . I just start the ball rolling in the right direction . . . .

― J (Jay), Thursday, 30 June 2005 21:37 (twenty years ago)

You people are such dickslaps!

ugh, the word "box."
You don't like "box lunch at the Y" at all? I know I do!

― Ian Riese-Moraine has been xeroxed into a conduit! (Eastern Mantra), Thursday, 30 June 2005 22:28 (twenty years ago)

Okay, so now that I'm not at work I looked at the jelquing page and ROFFLE-US MAXIMUS

It will be noticed that the head (or glans) becomes extremely red and that it will swell considerably. This is normal and good, and is due to the forcing of blood to that area.

"normal and good"??????

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 1 July 2005 00:37 (twenty years ago)

As opposed to abnormal and bad, you filthy communist.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 1 July 2005 00:40 (twenty years ago)

"Dude, are you okay??? It looks like you're smuggling a coconut in your shorts!"

"Naw man, I've been jelquing. That swelling is normal and good."

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 1 July 2005 00:43 (twenty years ago)

Dude, Where's My Jelque?

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 1 July 2005 00:44 (twenty years ago)

Of the 'most popular men' pages on Passion.com, they are ALL hugely, incredibly hung. Just sayin'

― slap, Friday, 1 July 2005 02:18 (twenty years ago)

That swelling is normal and good

Well, you have to put it in perspective, Dan. I mean compared to having tiny white spiders shooting out of your . . . shit, I've said too much again.

― J (Jay), Friday, 1 July 2005 12:52 (twenty years ago)

I was just talking to a friend of mine who's a film lecturer about 9 Songs, the Michael Winterbottom film with the music and the shagging and the gratuitous shots of Gruey's cock, and he pointed out that showing graphic shots of penises and vaginas and oral sex and whatnot would only actually start "transgressing boundaries" when one of these mainstream art/sex films with lots of cock shots features an actor with a small penis rather than your standard Ewan Macgregor / Gruey / sizable dong man.

― Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Friday, 1 July 2005 14:36 (twenty years ago)

What, like Harvey Keitel?

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 1 July 2005 15:14 (twenty years ago)

Dan! It was cold that day. C'mon, man.

― M. White (Miguelito), Friday, 1 July 2005 15:15 (twenty years ago)

lol @ that "jelquing" page.

OMG random googlers??!!

The worst thing is that I read the first page and I was like omg what if it works? then I read the instructions, urgh.

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Friday, 1 July 2005 15:30 (twenty years ago)

I for one welcome our new random-googlers-with-small-dicks overlords.

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 1 July 2005 15:35 (twenty years ago)

"what the fuck are you doing in there"

"I'm jelquing, woman! Stop laughing, it's for your benefit!!"

― Pashmina (Pashmina), Friday, 1 July 2005 15:37 (twenty years ago)

fucking a Harvey Keitel. Jesus I have successfully blocked all that from my mind, let's please never mention Harvey Keitel's penis again.

― Allyzay knows a little German (allyzay), Friday, 1 July 2005 16:54 (twenty years ago)

Harry K-Tel
I hate your famous guts
I know girls are sitting ducks
I know you've got the bucks
But what gets me is you schmucks
Think you can hit on any girl in the world
Without denting your fronts
As if morals themselves are simply image
Like you've got this gold-plated credit card charisma
To cover all the damage
Harry K-Tel the method actor once asked my sister to tweak
His tits while he jiggled and jangled his allegedly undersized cock
I don't think she complied (though maybe she lied)
But for the next three weeks
They had phone sex every morning between Scotland and New York
I hate your famous guts

How he jiggled his cock and tweaked his own nipples
While holding the telephone
Beggars the imagination, truly
But would be a lot more interesting to watch
Than one of Harry's movies

As written by a man we all know and love.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Friday, 1 July 2005 16:56 (twenty years ago)

Hahaha I thought that link would be to someone else's website, I was like wow that's really really edgy for Tr4in0!

― Allyzay knows a little German (allyzay), Friday, 1 July 2005 17:01 (twenty years ago)

HAHA!

― The Ghost of Dan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 1 July 2005 17:02 (twenty years ago)

Teabagging to thread.

[guess what this is a picture of? -mod]

― Smack my bitch up., Friday, 1 July 2005 17:19 (twenty years ago)

three months pass...

A New Book Entitled 'HUNG' Dispels the Myth About Sexual Prowess in African American Males

NEW YORK, Oct. 18 /PRNewswire/ -- When did we begin to buy into the belief that African American men are hugely, powerfully, and sexually endowed, and why do we continue to believe? Pop-culture journalist and author, Scott Poulson-Bryant, answers these questions and many others.

In his new book entitled "HUNG: A Meditation on the Measure of Black Men in America" (Doubleday), Mr. Poulson-Bryant exposes the sociological, psychological and historical reasons this idea has lasted through the years. The book uncovers and reaches under the covers to spotlight our obsession with the African American males sexuality and penis size.

Going back to slavery and the civil rights movement to Hollywood's blaxploitation of sex, Mr. Poulson-Bryant illustrates America's fixation through interviews, personal experiences and historical illustrations.

― Je4nn3 ƒur¥ (Je4nne Fury), Wednesday, 19 October 2005 19:55 (twenty years ago)

STOP IT JE4NN3 UR RUINING EVERTHING

― The Ghost of Black Elegance (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 19 October 2005 20:02 (twenty years ago)

"personal experiences"

― jaymc (jaymc), Wednesday, 19 October 2005 20:03 (twenty years ago)

omg, Dan, can we refer to you as TEH GHOST OF BLACK PROWESS? (I hate myself.)

― Je4nn3 ƒur¥ (Je4nne Fury), Wednesday, 19 October 2005 20:14 (twenty years ago)

OMG

― The Ghost of Black Elegance (Dan Perry), Wednesday, 19 October 2005 20:19 (twenty years ago)

The Ghost of Leaving Exit Wounds.

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Wednesday, 19 October 2005 20:23 (twenty years ago)

black sexual prowess is a matter of faith. science cannot prove or disprove it.

― M@tt He1geson (Matt Helgeson), Wednesday, 19 October 2005 22:16 (twenty years ago)

Science can but try.

― Beth Parker (Beth Parker), Wednesday, 19 October 2005 22:19 (twenty years ago)

i can vouch for dan

― strng hlkngtn: what does it mean? (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 19 October 2005 22:49 (twenty years ago)

Eddie Murphy to thread.

― Paunchy Stratego (kenan), Wednesday, 19 October 2005 23:07 (twenty years ago)

GROSS!!!!!!!!!!!

― mighty mouse, Thursday, 20 October 2005 03:00 (twenty years ago)

i read an excerpt of this in vibe. it looked lame.

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Thursday, 20 October 2005 03:48 (twenty years ago)

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