SHOCK ME!

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Say something shocking! It does not have to be true. It just has to shake me to the bone.

― Bug Joyce, Tuesday, 21 March 2006 23:27 (twenty years ago)

Put on your black leather.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 21 March 2006 23:28 (twenty years ago)

i put tiny razorblades in your lunch

― sunny successor (katharine), Tuesday, 21 March 2006 23:29 (twenty years ago)

Love ain't easy in BUTT TOWN.

― giggles, Tuesday, 21 March 2006 23:31 (twenty years ago)

Having BIG BALLS isn't as charming as it seems.

― giggles, Tuesday, 21 March 2006 23:33 (twenty years ago)

I ate the sheriff.

― giggles, Tuesday, 21 March 2006 23:34 (twenty years ago)

Elton John is gay.

― giggles, Tuesday, 21 March 2006 23:36 (twenty years ago)

George Michael does drugs and likes ladyboys.

― giggles, Tuesday, 21 March 2006 23:37 (twenty years ago)

I have never worked for a nigger.

― rocky with no fingers, Tuesday, 21 March 2006 23:47 (twenty years ago)

i guess that's why you still have teeth.

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Tuesday, 21 March 2006 23:51 (twenty years ago)

"I have never worked for a nigger. "

I won't let queers or dykes serve me at restaurants.

― Blunt Johnny, Wednesday, 22 March 2006 00:00 (twenty years ago)

http://www.mit.edu/~dcltdw/RPGs/Assassin/AHI/Images/emperor-lightning.jpg

― shemperor pulpateen, Wednesday, 22 March 2006 00:19 (twenty years ago)

I think we should all take a few minutes out of our day to help those less fortunate than ourselves :)))

― (Is ILX basically Seinfeld?) (Øystein), Wednesday, 22 March 2006 00:32 (twenty years ago)

http://img104.imageshack.us/img104/4767/shocker2qc.jpg

― team jaxon (jaxon), Wednesday, 22 March 2006 00:50 (twenty years ago)

http://www.signonsandiego.com/sports/outdoors/images/060320bigbass.jpg

― 25 pound bass, Wednesday, 22 March 2006 01:21 (twenty years ago)

...make me feel better

― Ace Frehley, Wednesday, 22 March 2006 01:21 (twenty years ago)

george w bush's mom is also HIS SISTER

― oops (Oops), Wednesday, 22 March 2006 01:23 (twenty years ago)

(soul SISTER)

― oops (Oops), Wednesday, 22 March 2006 01:24 (twenty years ago)

Mikey was a little boy
he liked to watch the clouds
he was born to fly
Mikey joined the navy
his father was quite proud
mother never wanted it that way
he got into the cockpit and rose into the sky
set his sites on beirut then let his missles fly boom boom

― Gabby, Wednesday, 22 March 2006 01:27 (twenty years ago)

only sissies drink beer. I drink everclear. You're a pussy.

I douche out my ass with 151 and wild turkey.

I use tobbaco spit as astro glide, I'm a real man...your a pussy that is all!

I can suck a guppie up my ass and spit out a flounder...please eat a big bowl of my shit.

― Canteen Boy, Wednesday, 22 March 2006 02:05 (twenty years ago)

Bruce Willis was DEAD ALL ALONG!

― chap who would dare to be a stone cold thug (chap), Wednesday, 22 March 2006 02:07 (twenty years ago)

Darth Vader is Luke Skywalker's dad and Jack Nicholson's sister

― oops (Oops), Wednesday, 22 March 2006 04:38 (twenty years ago)

I can't piss standing up.

― Phil Mishmimsh, Wednesday, 22 March 2006 06:57 (twenty years ago)

I can't spend a whole day without sticking my thumb up my ass.

― Phil Mishmish, Wednesday, 22 March 2006 06:58 (twenty years ago)

I once spent the night in a negro woman's bed.

― Phil Mishmish, Wednesday, 22 March 2006 06:59 (twenty years ago)

I stepped in my own shit once when I took a dump on someone's porch.

― Phil Mishmish, Wednesday, 22 March 2006 07:00 (twenty years ago)

My ex-girlfriend is a professed lesbian whore who is over 40 but tries to look 18 which makes her look over 60. I saw her picture in an internet meat market when I was looking for someone for myself and felt like a bag of turds because I used to share the same bed as that greedy wench.

― Phil Mishmish, Wednesday, 22 March 2006 07:04 (twenty years ago)

LOCK ME!

― worstthreadever, Wednesday, 22 March 2006 13:14 (twenty years ago)

I have felt enough hate in my heart to kill.

― flatulator, Thursday, 23 March 2006 23:25 (twenty years ago)

Can I piss in your mouth?

― -rainbow bum- (-rainbow bum-), Thursday, 23 March 2006 23:32 (twenty years ago)

dude, if you have to ask.

― sunny successor (katharine), Friday, 24 March 2006 00:00 (twenty years ago)

1. I may have contributed to human trafficking by getting some coffee in Orange County. The place had all of these hot Vietnamese chicks in scantilly clad clothes serving the brew. I slipped one of them a fifty and got a pretty decent handjob. I however, do not feel one bit of guilt.

2. I accidentally pissed on my right pant leg when trying to take a regular piss in a public urinal today. I didn't notice it until I walked outside and felt this cold wetness on my leg. I looked down and this streak of urine ran down my entire right inseam.

3. I enjoy watching videos of midgets breakdancing.

4. I have never stuck my dick in anyone's ass.

― Sunny Sunny Real Estate, Friday, 24 March 2006 03:52 (twenty years ago)

I have a moby dick.

― Lord of Acid, Friday, 24 March 2006 03:54 (twenty years ago)

OMG MY FUCKING FINGER

― pixel farmer (Rock Hardy), Friday, 24 March 2006 04:15 (twenty years ago)

I want my testicles twisted off and thrown to the dogs.

― TV Trauma, Saturday, 25 March 2006 20:25 (twenty years ago)

I stuck a finger in my 11th grade Spanish teacher's poontang then had her lick it.

― Stockholm Penis Envy, Saturday, 25 March 2006 20:43 (twenty years ago)

Everyone here will one day die. But not all on one day, presumably.

― David Orton (scarlet), Saturday, 25 March 2006 20:51 (twenty years ago)

I am a jew and i hate jews.

― Scrit, Saturday, 25 March 2006 23:17 (twenty years ago)

http://img104.imageshack.us/img104/8471/dumbo12hr.jpg

― sunny successor (katharine), Sunday, 26 March 2006 02:47 (twenty years ago)

SF bids adieu to healthy penis

http://www.ebar.com/images/articles/19_HealthyPenis_12.jpg

― StanM (StanM), Sunday, 26 March 2006 09:19 (twenty years ago)

The picture of the flying dog is the greatest thing I have seen on the internet.

BTW, that was not my shocking statement...

It is:

I sat on a lemon and when I got up it wasn't in the chair.

― Hoile Grangier, Sunday, 26 March 2006 23:24 (twenty years ago)

I had a wet fart the other day at a dinner party.

― Raven Blackbird (Raven Blackbird), Monday, 27 March 2006 08:48 (twenty years ago)

I don't like my neighbor's wife anymore.

― Slick Willie, Thursday, 30 March 2006 00:07 (twenty years ago)

i am currently sleeping with two girls.

neither knows about the other.

but we're all in the same room.

this is occurring while i am typing this.

― gear (gear), Thursday, 30 March 2006 00:14 (twenty years ago)

Ah, you're Alvin Lucier.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 30 March 2006 00:20 (twenty years ago)

gear = http://psppapers.com/wallp/v2/bv.jpg

― J.D. (Justyn Dillingham), Thursday, 30 March 2006 00:46 (twenty years ago)

There are more queers on ILX thn any other board in the universe.

― Kwell, Thursday, 30 March 2006 06:00 (twenty years ago)

ihttp://www.michaeljacksoncollector.com/MJSite/Novnieuw/stateofshockpicd.jpg

― timmy tannin (pompous), Thursday, 30 March 2006 06:42 (twenty years ago)

This man bid adieu to a normal penis. NSFW or play

― Daddy's Little Duder (unclejessjess), Thursday, 30 March 2006 07:24 (twenty years ago)

― tremendoid (tremendoid), Thursday, 30 March 2006 08:01 (twenty years ago)

i have the foil card version of that archie pic. veronicas flames look good all shiny.

― sunny successor (katharine), Thursday, 30 March 2006 12:53 (twenty years ago)

that cock made me lose my appetite

― ert, Thursday, 30 March 2006 12:58 (twenty years ago)

Barney Rubble is sexier than Fred Flintstone.

― Big Bungee, Friday, 31 March 2006 05:12 (twenty years ago)

oh. my. god.

― Eric H. (Eric H.), Friday, 31 March 2006 05:19 (twenty years ago)

http://www.extraneo.it/goatse/goatse_ipod_skin.html !

― StanM (StanM), Friday, 31 March 2006 07:29 (twenty years ago)

One out of four Italian families is considered poor.

― Hide Underneath the Skirts on the Left, Friday, 31 March 2006 11:42 (twenty years ago)

i ate some chocolate yesterday, then had a coughing fit, then blew my nose and chocolate came out

― i am not a nugget (stevie), Friday, 31 March 2006 11:45 (twenty years ago)

i ate some chocolate yesterday, then had a coughing fit, then blew my nose and chocolate came out
I did something similar yesterday. Instead of chocolate it was 5 alarm chili and it was a bean out of each nostril. It burned like hell.

― George the Chemist, Friday, 31 March 2006 11:51 (twenty years ago)

Fear of the gag reflex is overstated.

― 8.4.6, Friday, 31 March 2006 13:41 (twenty years ago)

James was 18 in Jamesw at 15.

― Mike the Mechanic, Friday, 31 March 2006 20:00 (twenty years ago)

http://monkeydyne.com/rmcs/opencomic.phtml?rowid=43283

― Dan (Booyah) Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 31 March 2006 20:01 (twenty years ago)

How close to kiddie porn is that?

― Morty from the Village, Saturday, 1 April 2006 04:38 (twenty years ago)

I got circumcised when I was 15.

― Yule Brenner, Sunday, 2 April 2006 20:21 (twenty years ago)

anal smelt run

― Holy makkara, Toivo! (OutDatWay), Sunday, 2 April 2006 20:29 (twenty years ago)

I've been with an ILX mother.

― Red Alert, Monday, 3 April 2006 19:47 (twenty years ago)

FKK's are great places to do unthinkable things.

― Heil, Tuesday, 4 April 2006 00:40 (twenty years ago)

The internet brought me ILX and Esteban!

― Tivo 7, Tuesday, 4 April 2006 11:56 (twenty years ago)

If I defy the pill bottle and take an Allegra on a non-empty stomach, the next time I poop I often find a complete, intact Allegra pill floating in the toilet.

― joygoat (joygoat), Tuesday, 4 April 2006 12:13 (twenty years ago)

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