the next food network star

the first cycle seems like so long ago! revive so dan selzer and I can back-and-forth on this.

Is this the one where AB, GdL and BF each have teams?

yep. they're "mentors" to their teams -- that's a new development.

OK, my daughter was telling me about this -- Linkie, one of the people on GdL's team, was at MUW the same years as my daughter, in their culinary program.

http://www.muw.edu/publicaffairs/2012_prnews/043012_food_network_star.html

Must have misheard Sarah -- Linkie graduated before Sarah started.

black guy contestant didn't want to go to the lower east side pickle place
white girl contestant didn't want to go to the harlem chicken & waffles place

and then there's me. gimme a quart of full sour and extra hot sauce for the chicken, pls.

This seemed a step up from the usual competition shows. I'm in for the season.

i can't figure out who they're grooming to win this thing. i don't feel like quirky makeup guy or quirky glasses girl are gonna make it -- they're comic relief, but probably not marketable enough.

how's the sandwich guy from the last season (?) been doing on the network

i never hear about him at all except for in promos for this show.

he's on sunday mornings at 11, apparently.

http://www.foodnetwork.com/sandwich-king/index.html

a good friend of mine was on the second season of this. it was weird seeing him on television (& even weirder seeing him on the side of of a bus in NYC that one time)

This is above average as these competition shows go. I like how Alton Brown is reinventing his look as he settles into middle age, as Bill Nye the Food Science Guy. Also, RIP Ted Allen's metabolism, too bad about the extra chin, but I bet all the amazing stuff he's gotten to eat over the years has been worth it.

This season of this horrible show is a tiny bit better than past seasons, in that it seems like some of the people actually know how to cook, and some aren't totally cringe-worthy. I mean, in past seasons there were contestants who got far, hell, who won, who seemed so totally unfit for being in front of a camera that it's amazing they even made the first callback.

Now as a hipster new yorker, I'm routing for Bed Stuy Do Or Dine guy, who obviously while erratic, at least is a talented and interesting chef and possibly an entertaining personality as well. It's funny watching Alton crush on him.

Personally I like the Hawaii guy as well.

this show is such an awesome piece of shit: "grill on grill action," that dude's description of fish sticks on the fashion week runway, tons of goofy "chopped" tie-ins

i can't imagine the do or dine guy not making it really far in this

the best part is the lingering shots of the discover card whenever the cast buys anything. cut to: discover card commercial.

Alton Brown looks like a motherfucker with some dark secrets.

Also, he totally threw one of his own team under the bus.

watching now. a drink for every time ippy says he's "hawaiian" or "laid back."

so glad I don't pay for cable

martita is laying on the "hola, i am first generation from mexico" stuff a little thick.

i can't believe i'm planning my sunday night around this.

show is terrible. people are terrible. Do or Dine will get a show whether he wins or loses. It will be on the Cooking Network instead and it will be awesome.

it's terrible, but i'm hooked. a half hour into this episode and i have no idea who's going home. they're all candidates for the chopping block.

but justin do or dine will definitely have a tv career outside of this show.

Justin is Do or Dine? Yeah he shd totes win. Have a soft spot for Martita, though.

I think I want Yvan to go home next, but I suppose he's blandly affable enough to be a dark horse in this race

imo the ascension of ippy is gonna make us pine for the days of guy fieri

someone on twop said that the target gift card might be ippy's consolation prize. e.g., there's nothing really wrong with him, but they don't see him winning.

Well, it's going to come down to viewer vote, which means the most middle-of-the-road, bland contestant is going to win. Trying to figure out which one that is – Nikki, maybe?

But yeah, you can tell that they're all super in love with Justin, he's going to get a show no matter what.

i can't figure out who's getting the loser edit this week. michelle?

I was a little surprised at that elimination

They sounded like they wanted to just eliminate both of them. That's okay, Martíta was super annoying anyway.

they've been trying to get rid of ippy for weeks, but for some reason they're drawing out his elimination. i guess he's eye candy?

They need people to eliminate next week, I guess. I think he's just been the less terrible of the people up for elimination when it comes down to that. God, how many people this season had their "point of view" be "I am from [insert place here]." Great, Martíta, you're from Mexico, but so are a hell of a lot of other people. At least hipster dude has like an actual philosophy regarding the food itself.

WHY DO I WATCH THIS SHOW

Because you are an addict. Oh yes.

DAMN YOU RAGGETT

The one thing I have been enjoying this season is the behind-the-scenes look it gives us at what terrible people Bobby Flay, Giada, and Alton Brown are, and how much they clearly hate each other. The impish joy that Alton receives from shooting down Giada is delicious.

Alton 2.0 -- middle-aged, bow-tied, more venomous than a coral snake. I hope he really cultivates that.

His eventual Food Network tell-all is going to be AMAZING.

I'm kind of astonished how willing he has been to undercut Martie

I thought it was funny how Bobby thought "Grill on Grill Action" was a great name for a show and the network people were like "Uh. No."

did you see the glare alton gave justin when justin said "good... eats, that is"??

Crying Alton was deeply disturbing.

i'm seeing martie winning the competition -- the network loves affable southerners and how-to-entertain shows. justin will get a show on the cooking channel.

http://i66.photobucket.com/albums/h271/stckhlmcnd/alton.jpg

Justin's pilot was the coolest thing I've seen in the food network in years. Wonder if Alton's trying to convince him that every episode should be an update of Good Eats.

Called "Great Eats"

Repurposed Eats

Justin's pilot was pretty good but who does his makeup? Seriously, that first closeup was scary. Red lips! White face!

Ha ha, the announcement that they would both be getting a pilot was handled in the most mean, gut wrenching way possible.

So who do you think is going to win? If it was up to "the network," I'd say Justin, no question. But since it's up to "America," I think Yvan is just blandly affable enough to take it.

i don't think yvan has people voting ten times a day for him.

Does Justin have a big interweb following? I don't pay attention to this stuff when I'm not watching it while eating dinner.

he seems to have a big twitter following. @EatFellowHumans is his handle.

at this point i find it very hard to imagine martie not winning but that's 100% my own cynicism talking

also that episode with paula deen where she got whatever the diametric opposite of a loser edit is

that's what we need, another Paula Deen.

i imagine paula's xenomorph needs a new host at this point, yes

Good job America. You picked the most obviously qualified candidate.

I've only watched the last two seasons of the show; is it always super obvious who's going to win?

i was really surprised that martie got cut! i thought for sure she'd get ammurica's votes.

I've only watched the last two seasons of the show; is it always super obvious who's going to win?

i've watched the show on and off during its run, and it's not always obvious. i didn't know that sandwich guy from last season was gonna win, but there weren't really any strong contenders last season.

He seemed like the obvious front-runner to me. They always make a big deal about how the show is supposed to be about evolving into a star, but usually it seems like the person who comes into the show seeming like a star ends up being the star.

fact: all of the top 3 live in nyc. as a native new yorker, i'm more than a little proud of this.

alton must feel like the cat that ate the canary right now.

"Sorry, Martie, we threw you a bone last week, but it turns out that America just hates you."

Wow there was a lot of trash talking about Emily in that finale