Have you Ever tried to talk someone you know out of killing themselves?

i've been in that situation before, and i found that just talking to the person (rather than trying to talk them out of anything) helped them take their mind off what they were thinking of doing.

A few people have done this on ILX. The people who were threatening suicide are still around. I'm not reviving the threads in question out of respect for the people who started them.

Hamlet: You cannot, sir, take from me any thing that
I will more willingly part withal; except my life,
except my life, except my life.

I guess I would tell them that even though it doesn't seem like it at the moment, life is short and passes quickly. Is this too cliche? I would tell them that instead of killing themselves, decide to become totally free. Do whatever you always wanted to do, but were always too timid to. Is this too reckless. God, I hope I'm never counted on to save a life.

I guess I would listen to *why* they wanted to kill themself and take it from there, rather than spouting platitudes. Though I guess anyone voicing their intentions is *looking* for someone to talk them out of it, which gives you an advantage, if it's you they've chosen to confide in. I would imagine talking about it = cry for help. Absolute intention to do it --> doing it rather than putting it up for discussion.

let's say that the *why* is that they can't stand living anymore. a sort of composite build-up of years of depression. How would you "take it from there?"

All you can do is be there - be their friend, listen, talk.

You could also handcuff yourself to them and jump off the building into the swimming pool below.

you could really stand to post less when you're drunk

What Trayce said. Presumably you know this (hypothetical) person or else they wouldn't be turning to you for help, therefore all speculation as to how to deal with it specifically is silly and pointless since each person is different, and you should be able to judge it based on your friendship with them. Cliched, not much help, but true, I'm afraid.

(Jim, it's not even 11 o'clock in the morning over here. I'm guessing Noodle isn't drunk, though I may be wrong)

Oh I'm still pretty pissed, ails.

Sorry, I under/over-estimated you (delete as appropriate). Hurrah for bank holiday weekends!

now I think I would make love to them, and send them skipping away like a giddy schoolgirl.

i had to do it last week, and a month or so before that, and several times before that (same friend, been depressed for years).

usually it's the same things that i tell him - how do you know it's better on the other side (or in words of Kabir "if you don't break your ropes while you're alive, do you think ghosts will do it after?"), your decision doesn't affect just you but people around you, if you do it it means that people who hurt you win etc.

i think it doesn't matter much what you say as much as how you say it. i think ailsa is OTM - if they talk to you - they want to be talked out of it, if they REALLY want to do it - they will.

the scary thing is that sometimes i ask myself if i'm doing the right thing by talking him out of doing it.

Once, over the internet. I tried to scare her out of it by telling her how hard it was, how she wouldn't be able to take enough tablets to overdose because her body would start to vomit them out way before the lethal dose and then she'd be stuck with an intolerance for life and would have to put up with headaches/period pain/child birth with no painkillers for the rest of her life. And how slitting your wrists was a lot harder than it looked and she'd be stuck with having to wear long sleeves and huge watches/bracelets in heatwaves. Then I told her about a bloke my mum used to know who ended up in psychiatric care because he jumped off buildings that he thought were high enough to kill him, but weren't, and how he couldn't attempt it again when he couldn't walk.

Then some teenage, depression-and-suicide-glorifying twat friend of hers decided to butt in and turn the whole thing into a discussion of what would actually be the best, quickest way of doing it.

I've no idea how much of the stuff I just wrote about overdosing/wrist slitting is actually true, but it sounded convincing enough. She's alive, happy and married now.

I've had this question in the back of my mind all day. I had a friend who was talking about committing suicide and eventually she had a breakdown (involving putting a nail through her foot, ouch!). I didn't try to talk her out of it, I just sort of talked to her... I don't think it did much good. What I should have done: told her husband about it, regardless of whether I thought it was violating our friendship in some way.

She's okay now, but still... I should have told him what she was talking about. Even if you can't talk a person out of killing themselves, sometimes there is someone closer to them that can help more. They at least deserve to know (if you know who they are).