Best Character/sketch from The Fast Show

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A poll to celebrate the impending release of a 7 DVD box set featuring the complete works of The Fast Show. Some of the descriptions are a bit vague (The Hearty Hiker, Jack Pot?), so check http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fast_Show_characters for a fuller description.

Poll Results

OptionVotes
Ted & Ralph 3
Professor Denzil Dexter 2
Rowley Birkin QC 2
Hello, We're Cockneys 2
Indecisive Dave 1
Billy Bleach, pub know-it-all. 1
Jesse and his strange diets, fashion tastes and experiments 1
Bob Fleming. 1
'You Ain't Seen Me, Right?' 1
Ken and Kenneth, the "Suit you!" tailors. 1
Dave Angel, Eco-Warrior 1
The hurrying family, "Come on! Hurry up! We're going to be late!" 1
Competitive Dad 1
Tommy Cockles 1
Chanel 9 News 1
Jack Pot & Tom Bowler 1
As an unnamed, Charlton Heston - style astronaut who rushes up to people and shouts "Where am I? What year is this?1
The 13th Duke of Wybourne 1
Different With Boys, who acts in harsh and professional, "no-nonsense" way in front of female friends and coll1
Brilliant Kid 1
Johnny Nice Painter 1
The presenter of a TV show called Worldview 0
Roger Nouveau 0
A full 6 hours in make-up. 0
Ed Winchester 0
A fish scientist who has no friends 0
Linda the Landlady 0
Checkout Girl 0
"Our" Janine Carr 0
Advertisements for the 'Gizmo' 0
Disco Baby, Sexy Baby song performed by Higson dressed as hairy overweight '70s disco star. Mikki Disco. 0
The Long, Slow Punch Up 0
The Offroaders 0
The Indie Band with John Thomson as the record executive Mr Wells. 0
The Nuns 0
We're from the Isle of Man 0
The Soppy Businessmen 0
The Unpronounceables 0
Ah-ha!....Shit! 0
Our Lord Jesus 0
The Alcoholics 0
The Fat Sweaty Coppers 0
The Patagonians 0
Roy & Renée 0
El Amoro I El Passionne 0
"Lesbians, Dave"0
Chip Cobb, the Deaf Stuntman 0
Arthur Atkinson 0
Advertisements for cheesy peas. 0
Does Anyone Fancy a Pint? 0
Chris the Crafty Cockney 0
The "monster" who terrorizes a young woman in her bed in the middle of the night with betting tips. 0
'Unlucky' Alf 0
Ron Manager 0
Archie the pub bore 0
The Hearty Hiker 0
I'm Sorry, I've Just Come 0
Swiss Toni 0
Geoffrey Norman MP, the Tory politician who denies everything. 0
Colin Hunt 0
Colin ('I'll Get Me Coat') 0
Patrick Nice 0
'Even better than that!' 0
Rubbish Dad: Brilliant Kid's Father. 0
HA!, an elderly woman who only ever interjects into family conversations with a sarcastic 'HA!' 0
Insecure Woman 0
No Offence, rude South African department store cosmetics sales woman. 0
The Builder seen perched on an RSJ suspended from a crane, eating his lunch and mouthing off about all and sundry. 0
Gideon Soames, a white-haired, bespectacled television historian. 0
Andy The Affair Man 0
John Actor (Monkfish) 0
Carl Hooper, Australian presenter of That's Amazing. 0
Squeamish Zookeeper 0
Sadistic Doctor who ritually teases and humiliates his patients. 0
Unnamed elderly attendant of a remote garage 0
Cane wielding public school headmaster. 0
Friendly but naked newlyweds. 0


Billy Dods, Tuesday, 30 October 2007 18:31 (eighteen years ago)

This is much harder than it looks.

I've narrowed it down to Competitive Dad, Indecisive Dave and Billy Bleach. I think.

aldo, Wednesday, 31 October 2007 10:18 (eighteen years ago)

my choice was between Dave Angel, Charlton Heston guy, Carl Hooper, Johnny Nice Painter.

Which one is "IN THE FOG, IN A HOLE, WITH AN OWL" ?

Ste, Wednesday, 31 October 2007 10:36 (eighteen years ago)

I like Archie "hardest game in the world" Pub Bore but I think I'll end up voting for Ted & Ralph.

onimo, Wednesday, 31 October 2007 10:48 (eighteen years ago)

voting for Rowley Birkin purely on strength of his touching farewell.

Ted and Ralph and Archie Pub Bore honourable mentions. None of Arabella Weir's characters are funny, ever.

darraghmac, Wednesday, 31 October 2007 11:06 (eighteen years ago)

Which of these are the nobleman and his older male servant whom he secretly loves? I saw the film made about them on tv a few years ago, it was great!

Tuomas, Wednesday, 31 October 2007 11:08 (eighteen years ago)

ralph and ted

That one guy that hit it and quit it, Wednesday, 31 October 2007 11:10 (eighteen years ago)

Rowley Birkin, the almost intelligible gibberish was just perfectly done, and yes the farewell was amazing. Props to Carl "That's Amazing" Hooper (overall I think Simon Day was my favourite). For some reason the hurrying family frequently just pop into my mind. "Come on!"

"IN THE FOG, IN A HOLE, WITH AN OWL" was I think the unnamed elderly attendant of a remote garage.

ledge, Wednesday, 31 October 2007 11:13 (eighteen years ago)

See, I loved 'Different With Boys,' but it was hard to leave out Ted and Ralph, Rowley Birkin, Our Janine, Channel 9 News and 'Hello We're Cockneys!'

Have never liked: Suits you sir and Six Hours In Make Up.

Anna, Wednesday, 31 October 2007 11:25 (eighteen years ago)

hmm, day would probably be my least favourite, but then tommy cockles is just fantastic.

he was also very very good indeed in the live show, where williams didn't come across as funny at all.

overall i'd say higson is my favourite. or maybe whitehouse. but i do like thomson.

darraghmac, Wednesday, 31 October 2007 11:46 (eighteen years ago)

I'm going to hold fire before answering. There are sketches which are clearly modern classics like Ted and Ralph, but I don't know if that necessarily makes them my favourites. Having said that, it's hard to vote for one of the smaller characters even if it was blisteringly funny. Then there are the ones which seem like perfect ideas - Brilliant Kid, Bob Fleming, Indecisive Dave, Competitive Dad - and the ones with a bigger worldview like Chanel 9 News. Gah, I've no idea.

Mark C, Wednesday, 31 October 2007 11:48 (eighteen years ago)

The Builder seen perched on an RSJ suspended from a crane, eating his lunch and mouthing off about all and sundry.

Is this the one whose stories always ended up with "did he f-"? He was good.

The Alcoholics family were good too. I'm not pissed!

onimo, Wednesday, 31 October 2007 11:58 (eighteen years ago)

yes, also briliantly done in the live show. i miss the fast show. and diana, obv.

darraghmac, Wednesday, 31 October 2007 11:59 (eighteen years ago)

I just remembered, I'm strangely fond of Friendly But Naked Newlyweds.

aldo, Wednesday, 31 October 2007 12:00 (eighteen years ago)

Which one is "This week, I will be mostly wearing Izzy Myakki!"

Mark G, Wednesday, 31 October 2007 12:01 (eighteen years ago)

Jesse's Diets.

aldo, Wednesday, 31 October 2007 12:02 (eighteen years ago)

this week, i arl be mostly wunderin why i am 3 1/2 munts pregnunt

darraghmac, Wednesday, 31 October 2007 12:02 (eighteen years ago)

Wot no Jazz Club (about which wikipedia says "a very obvious parody of The Old Grey Whistle Test" - you what?)

ledge, Wednesday, 31 October 2007 12:08 (eighteen years ago)

"None of Arabella Weir's characters are funny, ever."

rong. the safrican beauty therapist and the ignored woman were hilarious.

Frogman Henry, Wednesday, 31 October 2007 12:16 (eighteen years ago)

Dang, must have excised Jazz Club while removing all the other wikistuff.

Billy Dods, Wednesday, 31 October 2007 12:19 (eighteen years ago)

rong. the safrican beauty therapist and the ignored woman were hilarious.

no.

darraghmac, Wednesday, 31 October 2007 12:30 (eighteen years ago)

frogman henry OTM. its got to be Dave Angel though,

stevie, Wednesday, 31 October 2007 13:28 (eighteen years ago)

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

ILX System, Monday, 5 November 2007 00:01 (eighteen years ago)

thieving "kweek! kweek!" bluenoses ftw

That mong guy that's shit, Monday, 5 November 2007 00:13 (eighteen years ago)

The chef played by John Thomson who is very into stuffing birds should've been included here.

Noodle Vague, Monday, 5 November 2007 00:19 (eighteen years ago)

I like Simon Day

admrl, Monday, 5 November 2007 00:22 (eighteen years ago)

Jazz Club!

admrl, Monday, 5 November 2007 00:22 (eighteen years ago)

Nice!

Mark G, Monday, 5 November 2007 00:49 (eighteen years ago)

Isn't Patrick Nice actually Jazz Club? Maybe not. Bob Fleming edges out Chip Cobb, the Deaf Stuntman and Professor Denzil Dexter for me.

Matt #2, Monday, 5 November 2007 09:55 (eighteen years ago)

No, Patrick Nice is the "And then REM put on a bit of an impromptu concert for us. Which was nice". Jazz Club was Louis Balfour.

Dom Passantino, Monday, 5 November 2007 09:55 (eighteen years ago)

Surely Tommy Cockles and Arthur Atkinson should be one choice? Went for TC, just ahead of Dave Angel and Archie.

"You a black man, are ya? I used to be a black man meself, 30 years, man and boy"

Dom Passantino, Monday, 5 November 2007 09:57 (eighteen years ago)

What, no love for Ron Manager? Where's the Paul Whitehouse character, the enthusiastic young Northern bloke - "Aren't shovels great!"? I used to love him 'cos I knew a guy who was exactly like that.

Tom D., Monday, 5 November 2007 10:33 (eighteen years ago)

That's Brilliant Kid.

Dom Passantino, Monday, 5 November 2007 10:34 (eighteen years ago)

OH MY GOD THIS POLL.

I think I'll have to go for Rowley. I love him.

Trayce, Monday, 5 November 2007 10:36 (eighteen years ago)

Gotta be Competitive Dad. The sketch where he's playing cricket with his sons is one of the funniest things I've ever seen.

nate woolls, Monday, 5 November 2007 10:42 (eighteen years ago)

56 of the Queens runs!

Trayce, Monday, 5 November 2007 10:47 (eighteen years ago)

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

ILX System, Tuesday, 6 November 2007 00:01 (eighteen years ago)

are these polls broken?

Ste, Tuesday, 6 November 2007 09:43 (eighteen years ago)

26 votes.

Mark G, Tuesday, 6 November 2007 09:48 (eighteen years ago)


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