They should be castrated, those bastards.

Now, looking back on this, I'm thinking yeah, he's just a sad lonely old man. And he was really pretty harmless. But at the time it was fairly disturbing.

adult male comes onto adult male inappropiately = 'what if next time it's a little kid?? he should be sent to prison and fucking castrated.'

(adult female comes onto adult male inappropiately = 'oh man, you guys won't believe what happened to me last night, it was fucking awesome')

And I think obviously if a female did it it's not as menacing is it, there's a little thing called physiology involved.

2. It's unlikely I could be raped by a 60 year old woman, I'm unsure whether I'd be able to overpower a 60 year old man, I didn't really tell what state he was in.

3. When was the last time you heard of a woman raping a man?

So "physiology or no" is a pretty lame throwaway argument there.

Also if it was a woman telling this story above, would you be on your fucking high moral ground? Not a fucking chance.

Also it's NOT as though he just exposed himself to me, the guy had come into the toilet at least 5 times after me, and just stared. So I think all of that coupled together is enough. And yes perhaps 19 makes me an adult, but then do I look WAY older than 17 now or something?

I like the way you don't bother acknowledging that what I actually said was "so after riding the 3 second storm in which I wanted to murder this bastard".

I'm not sure how I would have reacted if it was a buff 20 year old, the fact was, it was a 60 year old man, and surely if I'm the raging homophobic you're suggesting I'd be JUST as freaked. Am I an ageist too?

Also comes onto "inappropriately" might be pinching someones ass or something, not masturbating in front of them having followed them into the toilets 5 times. Hey, is this a personal thing? Oh of course not with you Ethan.....

For comparison, walking to high school when I was 13, a friend and I were propositioned by a man who had his fly open and stroked his penis etc. There was no legal follow up to this (though all the school pupils were warned about it), partly because we thought he hadn't harmed us in any way. Did we make the right decision? I don't know, on reflection

Ronan, yr observation that you could sympathise with females' plight is astute; I frequently wonder if anger directed by males against expressions of homosexual sexuality - whether justified as in your case or unjustified as in the case of homophobia - is not at least partly an unconscious and *inevitable* fear and shame at being made to feel like a woman, which we (ie. males) all still regard as being degrading due to the associated loss of power/status.

As to the smilarities between this and a fmeale experince, I think it's up to the womyn here to talk about it and make their comparisons, I can't speak for them on this.

I think it's almost never appropriate to make a pass at someone by exposing and stroking your penis while talking to them. I think this is true whether the subject of your "affections" is a man or a woman.

well, maybe it would be appropriate in an environment where that kind of thing is considered acceptable behaviour. Perhaps it might be in the George or the Vortex, but I'll wager some local pub in Sligo is not mainly frequented by cockstrokers.

incidentally, what pub in Sligo was it? I must go and hang out in it next time I'm up there.

Not really. A woman could penetrate you with any number of foreign objects.

2. It's unlikely I could be raped by a 60 year old woman, I'm unsure whether I'd be able to overpower a 60 year old man, I didn't really tell what state he was in.

Huh. What if the woman was, oh, Chyna from the WWF (60+ and minus a kidney from steroid abuse). The assumption that women are automatically weaker than men seems a bit suspect to me.

3. When was the last time you heard of a woman raping a man?

It happens more than you think it does, believe me (albeit less than male on female rape, male on male rape, and maybe even female on female rape). That said, it does happen.

The original question is somewhat complicated, because while on the one hand I sympathize with your predictament (similar things have happened to me on a number of occassions and generally it's no fun) I don't think contacting the police is really the right move (mostly cause what he did is--at least in most of the US anyway--really only marginally illegal). I'm more inclined to think that contacting the club manager/bouncer is the better move (they'll throw dude out) and/or just telling the guy off (depending--i.e. don't do this if Mike Tyson shows you his cock then you just run). Obviously if what he's doing is really illegal (harrassment/assault/rape) that's where you contact the police, but as far as I can tell this guy who exposed himself to you which makes a lonely gay man with a fetish for younger guys. He didn't approach you again. He didn't attempt to get physical at any point. He didn't follow you home, etc. . . So this stalking, castrating, sex abuser thing seems a bit extreme. This is a relatively mild, although pretty unappealling if you are uninterested, come on. So an uncomfortable situation for you and an unfortunate taste of something which women and quite a few gay men have to deal with more than a bit. I am sorry though, I know that it ain't fun being aggressively hit on by anyone that you don't want to be hit on by and the more explicit the approach the more wretched the situation.

What you say Alex, is true, but I'm not assuming it's impossible that a man be raped by a woman, but GENERALLY speaking I think it is unlikely.

I do admit that I allowed myself to be more scared based on the simple fact that this guy really fit any stereotypical image I might have had of a paedophile or sex offender. And that's probably wrong.

Guys are predatory shits basically. I say this as a guy, as a segment of myself who has watched in horror as other segments of myself behave almost pathetically around good-looking people. Perhaps the pedophilia-obsession that currently grips secular society (where sanctity of childhood is the last universal ideal?) is partly caused by a desire to purge that pathetically predatory nature from ourselves, to locate it in these sick weirdos and dissociate ourselves from this universal tendency to treat people like sexual objects, to exploit our ability to do so at every opportunity.

(Ronan none of this is directed at you natch - I think most people understood the intention of the thread title. I just find the whole issue terribly interesting)

Ronan - do you look like a 12 yr old? If so, and yr over the age of 18, maybe we should chat ;-)

(Said entirely in jest and joing in with the daily mirror headline thing)

I'm a guy, I'm heterosexual, and I've been mildly hit on by many an uninteresting female - just so there's no confusion. Many hang on you. Never had one expose herself, but they rub/press themselves against me most unappealingly. Inappropriate stranger-ass grabbings, too. I guess it's not a big deal because I've never felt threatened by it. I've been hit on by guys too, but not inappropriately.

When you are abused, assaulted, what have you, it leaves you feeling frightened, guilty and shamed. Being angry is healthy but unfortunately many people who are victimized can't feel this or not at the right people. After you have been assaulted the feelings stay with you forever and what other people might take as innocent "come- ons" or harmless lechery makes you feel assaulted over and over and over. You feel like a tissue someone has blown their nose on and then thrown to the ground. That's what it feels like.

hulloo thurr everybody. I'm just back from a wee sojourn in Kintyre/Mull/Iona and very lovely it was too.

what an interesting thread. I would like to share an anecdote with youse all.

Some years ago when I was poor and a student I lived in Holloway in London. To get up north to visit my squeeze of the time who lived in Leeds I usually got the tube up to Brents Cross and hitched up the M1. Now once a man picked me up, old he was, and he smelled like a dog. He spun me lines about how hard it was for a student to live in London, and asked where I lived. It seemed he was a landlord himslef, with a lot of nice properties for a 'nice boy' like me. Then he started touching my leg. So anyway, I firmly asked to be let off at the next junction. Overall I thought he was a dirty old bastard, but more sad and pathetic than anyuthing else. He was really frail looking.

Anyway, a couple of months later HE PICKED ME UP AGAIN. Cruising between the Brent Cross roundabout and the first couple of services on the M1 must have been his hobby.

Takes all sorts dunnit.

and how was yr trip anyway?

Gavin - Ho ho not you AGAIN. Man- Hello nice Boy Gavin - I see you have a new car. Let me off at the next junction Man - Are you sure? Gavin - Ho yes.

It was pissing it down so he dropped me off at the first services.

gruesome news day

Carlos Castro, Portuguese journalist, killed and castrated at hotel, model Renato Seabra suspected

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/ny_crime/2011/01/07/2011-01-07_times_square_murder_man_found_dead_in_bloodsplattered_room_at_intercontinental_h.html?r=news