Excuse Me While I Pimp My Al Shipley-Approved Poetry Chapbook

Some of you knew this was coming, some didn't. Assembling the Lord is a chapbook of poems I wrote between 1995 and 2008 - namely, the best of the poems I wrote in that period: there are about 29 in there. Plus I wrote an introduction that's moderately entertaining. The droll, just-the-facts-ma'am tone of this email message belies the fact that I am totally stoked about this.

Anyway, if you want it, you can have it! See below:

http://www.twentythreebooks.com/books.htm

Here's what some famous people think about my poetry chapbook, which is not all religious poems or anything:

"Verse by Raymond Cummings will always be a pleasure to read. Assembling The Lord goes from styles of formal verse to a more jazz-cadence free form and back again on more than one level. To read through it one catches a glimpse of the amazing mind of Mr. Cummings. Read it and enjoy it!"
- David Drell, Baltimore Tattoo Museum curator

"When I read Ray's poems, it feels like the words are firing into my brain like bullets. His simplest phrases - "plucked cars, blown up dandelions" - pack such a punch, but his ideas and images stay sharp whether crammed into two-syllable bursts or stretched into spilling rhythms. Take these poems like pills, wear a flak jacket too - you'll be surprised by how much shrapnel can result from such quick, efficient verse."
- Marc Masters, author of No Wave

"I hate poetry. I didn't hate this. Are you sure this is poetry?"
- Al Shipley, music writer

http://img6.imageshack.us/img6/4466/911y.jpg

putting my name and the word "pimp" in the subject line is such a dirty SEO trick

i'm not sure what SEO means?

in any event, i didn't mean to offend...

seo is copywriting

just joking dog, but:

Search engine optimization (SEO) is the process of improving the volume or quality of traffic to a web site from search engines via "natural" ("organic" or "algorithmic") search results.

Oh for real? Seriously, that wan't the aim. Anyway, I feel like a jerk.

Mods, can you remove "Al Shipley-Approved" from the title? Thanxkbye

In the "thanks" section of the book, I give ilx props as a whole.

haha no i mean i'm not offended, i was just joking around! don't sweat it dude

okay man

i love that picture, though i wouldn't be caught dead in that truck

lol i just noticed "re rill not forget"

shouldn't it be "rorget"?

or "rorret"?

definitely rorret

thank you for the new display name, btw

hahahaha

always at yr service

is this up on piratebay yet?

(butseriously looks nice congrats!)

http://i41.tinypic.com/wu45zs.jpg

Yay! Congrats!

thanks man

nothing to add - just keepin' the dream alive, here

this is totally rad dude

i mean, the fact that youve published a book, tho im sure the poems are also rad

if he's so rad why hasn't he posted here

2009 ILE poetry CONTEST giggity goo!

srsly tho congrats I'm sure yr book is awesome

i didn't even know there WAS an ILE poetry contest

"rad" needs to get thrown around more as a euphemism, surely!

i wish i had more time to spend here, these days

Desperadaddio:

ICU pimpin', puffin' Benson and Hedges

Gin rummy vs. the orderlies, hedgin' and bettin'

Ds bust the ward, yo, Benson and Stabler

Cuff me to the rails, gank my Benson DVDs

only al will get this

Once my next book is done, I'm gonna start a thread detailing its promotion that no-one will keep up with

fixed:

Desperadaddio:

ICU pimpin', puffin' Benson and Hedges
Gin rummy vs. the orderlies, hedgin' and bettin'
Benson and Stabler, ward busted by the Ds
Cuff me to the rails, gank my Benson DVDs

New poetic product to pimp:

http://www.twentythreebooks.com/images/CrucialSprawlPressRelease.pdf

Approval of Al Shipley = not the Midas touch for poetry sales apparently

tbh i endorsed SO MANY poetry books that i probably dilluted my brand

ah fuck I feel like a dick

I feel more like a duck atm

https://www.google.com/search?ix=ieb&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8&q=al+shipley+pimp

lol @ 2nd result

thank god the pictures from my 'pimps and hoes'-themed party have been de-indexed

lol @ the second row of GIS results, who knew some dude was a closet transformer stan?

those are all via my brother, who is actually a somewhat prominent figure in the transformers online fan community #humblebrag

GIS is uniformly hilarious!

Ha

http://www.amazon.com/CLASS-NOTES-ebook/dp/B0073NDVK8/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1328058682&sr=8-1

A new eBook, by me. Looking at this page now, I realize why I never achieved a career in publicity.

― Raymond Cummings, Thursday, 2 February 2012 11:43 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

MARKUS DURK '80, a maritime architect based in Venice whose clients include the rappers Rick Ross and P. Diddy, is selling tee shirts bearing the legend "THIS SHIT QUAY."

― Raymond Cummings, Thursday, 2 February 2012 11:44 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

ARI FELDMAN '87 is an ordained officiant for a number of non-corporeal faiths and fellowships, and has the dog-eared, laser-printed certificates to prove it.

― Raymond Cummings, Thursday, 2 February 2012 11:44 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

That review by "D. Mowbray" made me want to jab myself with a sharpened pencil.

― Aimless, Thursday, 2 February 2012 18:17 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

Wouldn't life be dull if everyone took the same approach to Amazon.com reviews?

― Raymond Cummings, Friday, 3 February 2012 02:40 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

Amazon.com sales rank: 161,324

BALLIN'

― Raymond Cummings, Friday, 3 February 2012 12:38 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

Raymond Cummings is always willing to comment on Raymond Cummings.

― Aimless, Friday, 3 February 2012 17:09 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

Q: Is this book A1 Sh1pl3y-approved?

― jaymc, Friday, 3 February 2012 17:12 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

Haha nope

― Raymond Cummings, Friday, 3 February 2012 21:33 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

Aimless, how else am I gonna keep this thread alive?

― Raymond Cummings, Friday, 3 February 2012 21:38 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

Sorry to break it to you, but if you are the only participant, the thread is not alive. It is a cold, cruel world.

― Aimless, Friday, 3 February 2012 21:40 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

Point taken.

― Raymond Cummings, Friday, 3 February 2012 21:41 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

Al, will you approve my eBook?

― Raymond Cummings, Sunday, 5 February 2012 01:55 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

i think this will be the official ILX repository for shit i do that people can ignore

to wit (this one is free, though):

http://freepoetryfor.blogspot.com/2011/11/number-one-raymond-cummings.html

new poetry ebook, not free (but cheap!)

http://voguingtodanzig.blogspot.com/2012/09/seven-new-poems-title-says-it.html

Another ebook, about American Idol season 8:

http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00AOW6FQ2/ref=redir_mdp_mobile?redirect=true&ref_=pd_lpo_k2_dp_sr_1

Reaction to this so far is actually really good, more so than the satire/poetry books, Probably cuz Idol is a known quantity.

it's an interesting idea -- makes me wish i watched that season of Idol. shame they don't put it out on DVD.

I'm thinking of doing something on my blog where I post a quote from each episode write up and link it to a youtube vid of the episode in question, as a sort of reading reference.

If that stuff is online! I'm not sure yet.

Three sold! On the first day! I'm in heaven (seriously).

http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B00CNI0E94/ref=redir_mdp_mobile

New poems. Come for the title, stay for the jams.

Pimpin' ain't easy:

http://www.lulu.com/shop/raymond-cummings/vigilante-fluxus/paperback/product-22044342.html

If you want a sample PDF of poetry let me know and I'll hook it up

Al must get so annoyed when I re-up this thread.

http://www.lulu.com/shop/raymond-cummings/whorl-without-end-poems/paperback/product-24381243.html

(Please don't share this on social media - I'm building to that on Friday or Saturday.)

A small sampling here: https://www.splicetoday.com/writing/whorl-without-end

At long last, sir, have you no shame?

(not that there's anything wrong with that)

hahaha nah

And another one

https://www.lulu.com/shop/raymond-cummings/no-horizontal-tomorrow/paperback/product-gmyw7d.html?q=no+horizontal+tomorrow&page=1&pageSize=4