The "Let's Win the New Yorker Caption Contest" Poll: Week 1

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All the entries for the first week are in. Which is the best?

(I should note that I left out the vulgar ones, even though a lot of them were funny, just because I actually want to accomplish the goal in the thread title)

http://i42.tinypic.com/14l7ywm.jpg

Poll Results

Option	Votes
"They look more like her but they take after me."	10
"Okay, NOW they're just mocking us."	4
"I know their clipboards are proportional, but it makes it really hard to read their notes."	3
"What troubles me is that they're speaking German."	3
"Let's see how they react when the funding dries up."	2
"I think it's meant to be the one on the right's retirement party."	2
"How cute, they're imitating us." "How cute, they're imitating us."	2
"NERDS!"	1
"And the best part is, we pay them in cheese."	1
"I'm not sure their hearts are really in this better-mousetrap project."	1
"I see your mice have little clothes."	1
"Commodities? In this economy? You're DOOMED, mice!"	0
"These mice are different from the mice behind us; these mice have facial features."	0
"Are mice very much like people?"	0
"I am mildly disconcerted; apparently, I am carrying a water bottle."	0
"Hmm, I'm not sure -- she's a little mousier than the last woman I dated."	0
"The leader of the mice appears to have rounded up all the intellectuals in a gulag"	0
"The one in glasses is not 'the cute one'."	0
"I know they have a grant, but do we really need more ways to skin a cat?"	0
"I'll wring your neck if one of these bastards publishes before I do"	0
"I call the big one 'bitey'."	0
"This seems to answer the nature vs. nurture question pretty decisively."	0
"Apparently, they think we're some sort of gods."	0
"I'm afraid splicing in our own DNA may not be yielding the best results."	0
"Once they can write their own grant applications, _then_ you've got something."	0
Mice: "Let's grow massive ears on their backs, and see how they like it"	0
"Ha, Communism sounds great on paper - it just doesn't work in lab conditions!"	0

― ya'll are the ones who don't know things (Z S), Thursday, 11 June 2009 22:18 (sixteen years ago)

Is it bad form to say what you voted for? Lots of funnies, but one of these made me snort good and hard.

― Enemy Insects (NickB), Thursday, 11 June 2009 22:33 (sixteen years ago)

If we are voting for the thing most likely to actually win the contest, I think it would be: "And the best part is, we pay them in cheese."

If we are voting for the one we like best, I think I'd go with "I think it's meant to be the one on the right's retirement party" or the contest-inappropriate "They look more like her but they take after me."

― nabisco, Thursday, 11 June 2009 22:35 (sixteen years ago)

i don't know how man-rodent love plays at the New Yorker nowadays

― special guest appearance (Roberto Spiralli), Thursday, 11 June 2009 22:40 (sixteen years ago)

remnick really cracked down on it when he took over

― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Thursday, 11 June 2009 22:45 (sixteen years ago)

We should definitely vote on the caption most likely to actually win the contest.

― ya'll are the ones who don't know things (Z S), Thursday, 11 June 2009 22:46 (sixteen years ago)

Actually going for the cheese one might be underestimating the audience -- I think the retirement party is a likely winner.

(Didn't someone write an article a while back about what all winning captions have in common? I think the retirement party ticks all the relevant boxes.)

― nabisco, Thursday, 11 June 2009 22:55 (sixteen years ago)

Was it this article?

Slate: How To Win the New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest

― ya'll are the ones who don't know things (Z S), Thursday, 11 June 2009 22:56 (sixteen years ago)

Automatic thread bump. This poll is closing tomorrow.

― System, Thursday, 11 June 2009 23:01 (sixteen years ago)

'I think it's meant to be...' sounds like a subtle dig at the cartoonist, which would be awesome if it won. a victory for the normals!

― Philip Nunez, Thursday, 11 June 2009 23:20 (sixteen years ago)

I laughed hardest at the Simpsons' ref, but instead I voted for the classic NERDS

― Kitchen Paper Towel (Shakey Mo Collier), Thursday, 11 June 2009 23:25 (sixteen years ago)

That's weird, I could have sworn I set the poll closing date to the 13th (Saturday). Oh well.

― ya'll are the ones who don't know things (Z S), Thursday, 11 June 2009 23:28 (sixteen years ago)

server time zone follies

suck it america

― 鬼の手 (Edward III), Thursday, 11 June 2009 23:33 (sixteen years ago)

"What troubles me is that they're speaking German." is clearly the most New Yorkery of them all.

― ti's girl on the outside (musically), Thursday, 11 June 2009 23:35 (sixteen years ago)

I ended up voting for "And the best part is, we pay them in cheese.", just ahead of "What troubles me is that they're speaking German."

― ya'll are the ones who don't know things (Z S), Friday, 12 June 2009 14:23 (sixteen years ago)

clipboards ftw

― U2 raped goat (darraghmac), Friday, 12 June 2009 14:25 (sixteen years ago)

I laffed best: "I call the big one 'bitey'."
I like best: "I'll wring your neck if one of these bastards publishes before I do"
A possible winner: "Okay, NOW they're just mocking us."

― Mark G, Friday, 12 June 2009 14:27 (sixteen years ago)

I most liked "I see your mice have little clothes," ahead of "What troubles me is that they're speaking German" because there are more and less funny connotations to that one and I didn't want it to win on less funny. Clipboards was good too.

This is a good poll idea! Keep doing it!

― Maria, Friday, 12 June 2009 14:28 (sixteen years ago)

Maria did you see the other thread where we gathered nominations?

Let's Win the New Yorker Caption Contest

I really liked "Okay, NOW they're just mocking us." The only problem with it is the NOW in all capital letters. It doesn't seem like the New Yorker would accept that, and without the emphasis on NOW the joke is lost.

― ya'll are the ones who don't know things (Z S), Friday, 12 June 2009 14:31 (sixteen years ago)

I think one of the funding ones has the best chance of winning.

― Zelda Zonk, Friday, 12 June 2009 14:36 (sixteen years ago)

no, i didn't see it! thanks!

― Maria, Friday, 12 June 2009 14:37 (sixteen years ago)

they'd underline the now, zs

― rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Friday, 12 June 2009 14:38 (sixteen years ago)

Yeah, I suppose you're right. Now I'm kind of wishing I had voted for it. At the same time, it still seems like there is some sort of NYer bias against captions with emphasized words. I have no evidence, just a gut feeling.

― ya'll are the ones who don't know things (Z S), Friday, 12 June 2009 14:50 (sixteen years ago)

"Okay, now they're just mocking us."

Still works, I reckons.

― Mark G, Friday, 12 June 2009 14:56 (sixteen years ago)

And the winner is...

― ya'll are the ones who don't know things (Z S), Friday, 12 June 2009 22:59 (sixteen years ago)

Automatic thread bump. This poll's results are now in.

― System, Friday, 12 June 2009 23:01 (sixteen years ago)

...Roberto Spiralli's "They look more like her but they take after me."!

― ya'll are the ones who don't know things (Z S), Friday, 12 June 2009 23:03 (sixteen years ago)

By a wide margin, too. Would you mind submitting your caption to the New Yorker at this link?

http://www.newyorker.com/humor/caption

(and everyone else should of course feel free to enter their own caption, too)

― ya'll are the ones who don't know things (Z S), Friday, 12 June 2009 23:05 (sixteen years ago)

i think the 2nd one should be our official entry. there really is zero chance of the bestiality innuendo getting in, however gentle.

― special guest appearance (Roberto Spiralli), Saturday, 13 June 2009 01:05 (sixteen years ago)

i liked the idea of whatever we submit being done under 'ignatius l. xenotype' or whatev

― johnny crunch, Saturday, 13 June 2009 01:07 (sixteen years ago)

i think the 2nd one should be our official entry. there really is zero chance of the bestiality innuendo getting in, however gentle.

I tend to agree (although I think yours is funny!), but I didn't want to be the one to go against a democratic vote.

In that case, Dan would you mind submitting yours?

― ya'll are the ones who don't know things (Z S), Saturday, 13 June 2009 01:16 (sixteen years ago)

Can't we submit both?

― Pleasant Plains, Saturday, 13 June 2009 01:22 (sixteen years ago)

Yeah, of course! As I mentioned above, everyone should feel free to enter whatever caption they want.

― ya'll are the ones who don't know things (Z S), Saturday, 13 June 2009 01:32 (sixteen years ago)

It's a beastiality joke, but if they were puppies it would be ick but with mice it's ha ha ha.

― Eazy, Saturday, 13 June 2009 05:18 (sixteen years ago)

right, it's bestiality in a really absurdist sense - it doesn't make you actually visualize a human having sex with a mouse.

― iatee, Saturday, 13 June 2009 05:22 (sixteen years ago)

well, maybe some people

― iatee, Saturday, 13 June 2009 05:22 (sixteen years ago)

i submitted it in the interest of science

― special guest appearance (Roberto Spiralli), Saturday, 13 June 2009 12:45 (sixteen years ago)

FUCK I missed submitting this because I didn't see the poll (stupid going out and being away from the internet)

― sorry i poisoned u with nachos :( (HI DERE), Monday, 15 June 2009 20:09 (sixteen years ago)

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