Being Cruel To Be Kind - C/D

I'll take that as the former then, cheers everyone!

I wouldn't be very sadistic if there was kindness involved...

depends on what you mean by cruel, doesn't it?

i always tell people that they should be honest with me because i value honesty, in a way being cruel to be kind. but in reality i can't handle criticism so its dud. or i am. or something.

it does serve a purpose, it is to cause momentary suffering in order to not mislead people and rope them or yourself into a long-term situation you don't want to be in. only you've got to be really tough in order to cause the momentary suffering.

I can only say this : I just finished Venus in Furs. It was so sad and sensual.

depends on what you're talking about. do be specific, here. what is your conception of 'being cruel to be kind'. sounds to me like a rationalization.

and the problem with the concept of being 'cruel to be kind' is that the do-er is the one who decides what is 'kindness'. in other words, the do-er is appointing themselves judge and administering the sentence. again, it's arrogance. so yes, you're right: it's simply sadism borne out of a sense of entitlement. you're not being kind if the thing you did causes more damage and even more scars than there were before. if you do that, you're just an abuser.

Oh I don't really know what I'm talking about, sorry to have been so vague.

Have you ever been in a situation where someone says "I'm not having a go or anything" or "Don't take this personally" and then proceeds to say something really hurtful? Employers are very good at that in my experience.

I think I have it within me to provoke a reaction, any reaction rather than enduring the bland status quo. I could justify it as "trying to make life more interesting" or something pathetic like that but ultimately it's sheer egotism. I didn't bother doing the personality test but could from reading the summaries that I would definitely be borderline/histrionic.

All is vanity.