How do you get a job/a shot at a job at the NME?

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Serious question.

― Cozen (Cozen), Saturday, 22 March 2003 00:55 (twenty-three years ago)

Are you Taliban?

― N. (nickdastoor), Saturday, 22 March 2003 00:57 (twenty-three years ago)

being irrelevant is a good skill to have.

― Mike Taylor (mjt), Saturday, 22 March 2003 00:58 (twenty-three years ago)

*to tune of Ebeneezer Good* Ah'mTaliban, Ah'mTaliban, wo-ho-oh, oh, Ah-ah'mTaliban!

― Cozen (Cozen), Saturday, 22 March 2003 00:58 (twenty-three years ago)

write some hysterically funny reviews - send them in - restore NME to greatness

― stevem (blueski), Saturday, 22 March 2003 11:39 (twenty-three years ago)

I misread this as "how do you get shot at the NME?"

― Jody Beth Rosen (Jody Beth Rosen), Saturday, 22 March 2003 11:45 (twenty-three years ago)

Don't ask me, apparently I'm 'incomprehensible'. Oh wait, that was the LRB who said that, not NME

― dave q, Saturday, 22 March 2003 11:55 (twenty-three years ago)

A lobotomy would be a good start. Then perhaps you could write the same article each year in September about the albums that all students own, which should not actually feature any of the albums that students do all own (Weezer S/T, "Blue Lines", "Hello Nasty"), and instead some albums by bands that influenced whoever was on the cover that week.

Remember to be patronising- your readership are idiots.

You should treat liking top ten pop singles as some sort of act of massive subversion, rather than, you know, it being an act of liking music.

Fucking obvious facts, like "The White Stripes aren't related" or "The Hives aren't really a boy band put together by a mystery man" should be treated like the fucking Watergate Revelations.

You should be pigshit ugly.

You should say something smarmy about Guardian music journalists, and then go and write for the Guardian when your NME contract runs out.

― Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Saturday, 22 March 2003 12:01 (twenty-three years ago)

I'd agree with Dom's comments but you also have to have a very short grasp of irony, especially when discussing politcal issues - of which NME journalists (especially Steven Wells) are unsuited. Thus, when picking up your big cheque from IPC and talking about what great sponsors Coca Cola and Carling are remember to wax on about 'the evils of capitalism'. Let's face it, for a magazine with so called 'socialist' leanings, NME is a barrel of contradications and actually quite amusing.

And the student issue is great! Where do they get their info about what students act like??? A John Hughs movie?

― Calum, Saturday, 22 March 2003 12:14 (twenty-three years ago)

Ha ha Dom funny. A friend of mine went out with a Melody Maker journalist briefly before it's demise. He was reviewing a book by Tony Parsons, which me and some friends stole and left in a public toilet somewhere. Yes, we thought he was a twat.

― Nordicskillz (Nordicskillz), Saturday, 22 March 2003 12:32 (twenty-three years ago)

You know somebody at the NME. And you know somebody who knows an editor at the NME. But more than likely with the state of affairs and the fact that they already have freelancers coming out of their ears I would move on and try another magazine.

― luke cage, Saturday, 22 March 2003 13:33 (twenty-three years ago)

From my experience of two universities and 5 years of studying (4 years undergrad, 1 year postgrad) I'd say that most students like at least one of the following bands:

*The Stone Roses
*Oasis
*Nirvana
*Primal Scream
*Fatboy Slim/ Chemicals/ Prodigy (mainstream dance in other words)

The notion that all students are indie NME types with 'Is This It' sellotaped into their walkman is bullshit. I did my psotgrad year from 2001 to 2002 and out of everyone I met I was the only one who had even heard of the fucking Strokes. Students generally could give two fucks about music. Indie nights at my old uni were fucking empty and I doubt my best mate throughout uni had heard a Smiths song until I got into them.

― Calum, Saturday, 22 March 2003 15:06 (twenty-three years ago)

yeah there seems to be little to no interest in music in my college,beyond tribute bands...

― robin (robin), Saturday, 22 March 2003 15:13 (twenty-three years ago)

i thought all the college crowd were into METAL

― stevem (blueski), Saturday, 22 March 2003 15:26 (twenty-three years ago)

Back in the day, I got a freelance gig at The Paper That Is No Longer With Us by writing lots of snotty letters to their letters page trying to demonstrate how clever I was. Unbelievably, it worked! Well, a staff writer there - who is now an occasional poster to these boards! - wrote me a v nice letter and suggested I sent in a couple of sample reviews. And I think the snotty letters had made the reviews editor remember by name, and so maybe look more carefully at the samples. Plus: they thought I might be a hot girl. (True!) Anyway, the freelance gig didn't really work out for me - a combination of "be careful what you wish for" and various things going on in my life at the time.

I'm not sure how easy it is to get into the NME these days, though. My method might be worth a shot.

― Jerry the Nipper (Jerrynipper), Saturday, 22 March 2003 16:33 (twenty-three years ago)

i also received my first publication because the editor thought i might be a hot girl.

i suggest you all change your names to chesty la rue.

― jess (dubplatestyle), Saturday, 22 March 2003 16:37 (twenty-three years ago)

atudents are all into hip hop. and they all wear really clean hip hop style clothes. art students like the yeah yeah yeahs and think no-one else has heard of them.
drum and bass too, it's huge at my uni. every guy who knows how to strangle a crossfader to evacuation ofd the room dj's d'n'b.

― matthew james (matthew james), Sunday, 23 March 2003 11:21 (twenty-three years ago)

If I changed my name to Max Power could I get a job at Q?

― mei (mei), Sunday, 23 March 2003 11:25 (twenty-three years ago)

Steve Lamacq got his NME gig by using a girls name too

― stevem (blueski), Sunday, 23 March 2003 12:34 (twenty-three years ago)

Go and ask Paul Lester if you can write for Uncut instead! I need some back-up with my little Clyde puffer boat of resistance! ;-)

― Marcello Carlin, Sunday, 23 March 2003 13:05 (twenty-three years ago)

The only thing I like Uncut is my cocaine. Certainly not that magazine which suffers from Ginger Rage.

― luke cage, Sunday, 23 March 2003 13:51 (twenty-three years ago)

Lots of jobs require at least two years' journalism experience to even stand a chance. Bring back Papercuts!

― PJ Miller (PJ Miller), Sunday, 23 March 2003 14:04 (twenty-three years ago)

(Haha, Marcello - I ruined that 'opportunity' big style by saying 'well, I know it has faults but I'd really like to write for it'. Lester: 'what faults do you think it has?'. Cue me, big mouth agape: 'Well, this and this and this and these other 1000 words...')

― Cozen (Cozen), Sunday, 23 March 2003 14:56 (twenty-three years ago)

Back in the day, I got a freelance gig at The Paper That Is No Longer With Us by writing lots of snotty letters to their letters page trying to demonstrate how clever I was. Unbelievably, it worked!

It was a sight to behold too. :-) What's your position on any more type-ups of yer pieces from then? I know you were wary of the Catwalk review I posted but the Pinefox was intrigued.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 23 March 2003 15:16 (twenty-three years ago)

I really wouldn't bother with NME - the short answer on how to wortk there is know the "right" people, but if you do actually get to know the "right" people you'll regret it almsot instantly... I've worked there and fucking hated it. Uncut also bores me to tears (with the exception of Simon Reynolds and Ian Penman when they show up in there). Marcello, just out of interest dow do you get Paul Lester to talk to you/deign to read your work? I've never had a great deal of success with the man...
Dave

― Dave Stelfox, Sunday, 23 March 2003 16:23 (twenty-three years ago)

You need a talent for inventing a "scene", hyping it up as bigger than The Beatles, and then a talent for writing really sarcastic negative reviews for every single act associated with that "scene" half a year later on.

― Geir Hongro (GeirHong), Sunday, 23 March 2003 17:07 (twenty-three years ago)

*Fatboy Slim/ Chemicals/ Prodigy (mainstream dance in other words)

I'd consider them somewhat in-between mainstream dance and underground dance. Mainstream dance would be more along the lines of Sash, 2 Unlimited, Technotronic or Snap.

― Geir Hongro (GeirHong), Sunday, 23 March 2003 17:09 (twenty-three years ago)

he only thing I like Uncut is my cocaine.

I can think of something else.

― Sean (Sean), Sunday, 23 March 2003 17:16 (twenty-three years ago)

The only thing I like Uncut is my cocaine

Post your circumcision propaganda elsewhere. :-)

― Geir Hongro (GeirHong), Sunday, 23 March 2003 17:34 (twenty-three years ago)

Does anyone here write for Ice Magazine? They have headlines like JUG-TASTIC! Got to be worth a go...

― PJ Miller (PJ Miller), Monday, 24 March 2003 09:06 (twenty-three years ago)

reply to dave: do you mean initially? well, simon r (who i know anyway) sort of acted as broker between me & PL last summer. he alerted PL to the existence of The Church of Me and then I followed it up by emailing him some sample 100-word reviews & then 'phoning - we got on like the proverbial H on F and he took me on straight away.

I suppose it also helps that PL and I agree musically on most things (pop-wise, anyway) - he's school of '81/82 New Pop, same as me, is not at all a fan of the retro/Americana slant and I think was very keen to have someone else come on board who was "on his side." Especially as he has been told not to use Morley or Penman :-(

― Marcello Carlin, Monday, 24 March 2003 09:25 (twenty-three years ago)

Paul Lester suffers from ginger rage, bad dress sense and a tendancy to show up on television on five in the morning discussing Tears for Fears. He is a pub bore delight! : - D

― Samson, Monday, 24 March 2003 09:52 (twenty-three years ago)

And if Paul Lester is reading just have to ask - did you get the Courtney Love single yet? No? Maybe it's because you suck ginger man!

Bhahahaha!

― Samson, Monday, 24 March 2003 09:58 (twenty-three years ago)

Samson you are not sounding like your usual jolly self ahem ;-)

― Marcello Carlin, Monday, 24 March 2003 10:07 (twenty-three years ago)

: - P

― Samson, Monday, 24 March 2003 10:08 (twenty-three years ago)

Samson, it's nice to see you back.

― electric sound of jim (electricsound), Monday, 24 March 2003 22:54 (twenty-three years ago)

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