rap's very worst one-liners

Message Bookmarked

Bookmark Removed

start us off kanyeezy, with that doozy off the new jadakiss track you produced:

"are you into astrology? cause i'm try'na get to uranus"

― m. (mitchlnw), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 21:37 (twenty-two years ago)

yeah, that should totally be "analstronomy"

― Spencer Chow (spencermfi), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 21:40 (twenty-two years ago)

he doesn't even pronounce it ASStrology

xpost

― m. (mitchlnw), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 21:46 (twenty-two years ago)

budden ain't that bad, but after he tells his orally reticent beaux that "you can do anything if you put your mind to it", he has to really ruin it with his big DO YOU SEE moment and ask us if we "get it? no? think about it".

when was the last time nas told an actual joke? i'm sure that didn't come off well.

― m. (mitchlnw), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 21:56 (twenty-two years ago)

Actually, it SHOULD be astronomy, which is the study of planets, not astrology, the study of horoscopes!

― King Kobra (King Kobra), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 22:05 (twenty-two years ago)

[kanye] you a PI-SCES?/cos those TIGHT JEANS/make me wanna see you in just your LIGHT SKIN/ and have a NIGHT SWIM/in your O-VARIES/but if you one'a THOSE ARIES/I'll RAM it real deep 'til you SO WEAK at the KNEES [/kanye]

― m. (mitchlnw), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 22:24 (twenty-two years ago)

Black Eyed Peas to thread.

― stephen morris (stephen morris), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 22:52 (twenty-two years ago)

my personal favorite -- Nas, doing a guest spot on a Kelis track:

"The pussy or the mouth? That is the question / Like Shakespeare / But my erection is the case here."

― joseph cotten (joseph cotten), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 22:54 (twenty-two years ago)

Ouch.

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 22:59 (twenty-two years ago)

Gap tooth in ya mouth / so my dick's gots to fit - Dr. Dre, throwing a barb at Luther Campbell in "Dre Day"

is it just me, or does it sorta sound like Dre is insulting himself here?

― King Kobra (King Kobra), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 23:00 (twenty-two years ago)

it's funny i see this because i was going to look for another thread which i think is around somewhere. so, this is not really a one-liner but i was listening to 'illegal business' today and noticed that "one afternoon around 11 o'clock" is a really dumb line and makes no sense. i don't know why i never noticed that before. it reminds me of this guy i work with who answers the phone at 8am "good afternoon"

― ron (ron), Tuesday, 15 June 2004 23:08 (twenty-two years ago)

"is it just me, or does it sorta sound like Dre is insulting himself here?"

i got a one inch dick/no it ain't that thick/but when i's time to fuck/it really does the trick

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Wednesday, 16 June 2004 00:19 (twenty-two years ago)

i got a one inch dick/no it ain't that thick/but when i's time to fuck/it really does the trick

who the hell said that?

― King Kobra (King Kobra), Wednesday, 16 June 2004 00:56 (twenty-two years ago)

um i did, i made it up. i was just responding to the dre thing.

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Wednesday, 16 June 2004 00:59 (twenty-two years ago)

I thought Dre was talking about Eazy-E on that track.

― Mark (MarkR), Wednesday, 16 June 2004 02:16 (twenty-two years ago)

That Dre line is cool, yr all crazee.

"You ain't got the skills to eat a nigga's ass like me"
-Canibus.

― djdee2005, Wednesday, 16 June 2004 03:01 (twenty-two years ago)

lemonade was a popular
drink, and it still is

― juiceboxxx (juiceboxxx), Wednesday, 16 June 2004 03:05 (twenty-two years ago)

Mark, different verses in that song attack Eazy E, Luke and Tim Dog. And the video attacks the Geto Boys for some reason, unless there was some beef between them and Dre that I don't know about. Man, I fucking love "Dre Day." It's a totally vicious diss track that was released as a single, was a huge hit and had an equally, if not MORE inflammatory video!! It's amazing he didn't get killed over that shit. I mean, there was NO WAY any of them could ever recover from millions and millions of fans chanting "Eazy E can eat a big fat diiiiiiick! Tim Dog can eat a big fat diiiick! Luke can eat a fat diiiick!" OK, I guess Luke did all right afterwards, but he had a completely different fan base from Eazy, whose fans all probably listened to Dre too, or Tim Dog, who... uh, wait, who was Tim Dog again?

― Mike Ouderkirk (Mike Ouderkirk), Wednesday, 16 June 2004 03:22 (twenty-two years ago)

I think it's Choclair, or Kardinal Offishall, one of those candian rappers who says

"Girl you are looking good like food"

― Andrzej B. (Andrzej B.), Wednesday, 16 June 2004 05:39 (twenty-two years ago)

Where did you get the idea the video is about the Geto Boys? That's so obviously supposed to be Eazy. "We've got your record company surrounded ... put down the candy and let the little boy go."

And given the viciousness of the track, Eazy's response ("Real Muthafuckin G's") was incredibly disappointing. I mean, it's hard to hear "You claimin' my city, but Dre, you ain't from Compton" after Ice Cube so deftly dropped "Yellin' 'Compton,' but you moved to Riverside" on "No Vaseline."

― Cricklewood Massive, Wednesday, 16 June 2004 11:25 (twenty-two years ago)

And given the viciousness of the track, Eazy's response ("Real Muthafuckin G's") was incredibly disappointing.

What's worse is that Eazy's response had Dre's production stamp all over it.

― King Kobra (King Kobra), Wednesday, 16 June 2004 15:59 (twenty-two years ago)

You must be logged in to post. Please either login here, or if you are not registered, you may register here.