if yr a reviewer, should you comment on music by friends and acquaintances, and keep quiet?

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hey,
as someone who is a bit spoiled by getting to pen their opinion in reviews & such, i find it a bit hard to switch off the forever-critical part of my brain which is always assessing whether i like something or not and why. anyway, a few friends i know are in bands, and i was wondering whether it is better to just offer polite praise and keep any criticisms to myself or to actually pipe up and blabber about what i really think... or offer something in between the two, or only when asked. it is a bit hard when you are quite close to someone and you don't want to quite lie but also want to be supportive as well. but you don't want to champion mediocrity either. or lose all yr friends. thoughts?
thank you.

― poker face, Tuesday, 24 August 2004 11:59 (twenty-one years ago)

i mean in a personal context, rather than jabbering in printed reviews or public forums (like this!!).

― poker face, Tuesday, 24 August 2004 12:00 (twenty-one years ago)

keep your mouth shut and keep your friends.

― dickvandyke (dickvandyke), Tuesday, 24 August 2004 12:04 (twenty-one years ago)

I always turn such commissions down for professional reasons. My principal responsibility as a writer is not to be "supportive" to musicians I know but to recommend music to my readers, who by definition come first.

If it came to a choice between championing mediocrity and losing all my friends I would have no hesitation in opting for the latter; because, after all, if they need so much "support" and will turn on you if you do not automatically worship everything they do, then they're not really friends, are they?

― Marcello Carlin, Tuesday, 24 August 2004 12:14 (twenty-one years ago)

My policy is to accentuate the positive without going overboard. If they really, really dig for what I don't like then I'll give it up. But most people don't want to hear it & leave the bad stuff alone.

― Mark (MarkR), Tuesday, 24 August 2004 12:19 (twenty-one years ago)

"most people don't want to hear it and leave the bad stuff alone." Too true, but the best ones want it all. Madonna's said she knows she's "not the best" singer, so always focussed on developing everything else. The only friends I'm *thinking* about reviewing are far away, so no awkward face-encounters, plusin one case (out of two),distance also allows me to preview without the friend knowing, so I can decide not to review, discreetly. (The other one knows it would be blog-only, as well as different-hemispere-only, plus knows the CD amazes me, so no prob). *If* I do review either of these, will def, incl. disclosure. Don't really know either party so very well, absically, or might/prob? not even consider it.

― Don, Tuesday, 24 August 2004 13:38 (twenty-one years ago)

Should clarify that I wasn't talking about a formal review, just "Take a listen to this and see what you think." I avoid reviewing things by friends.

― Mark (MarkR), Tuesday, 24 August 2004 14:24 (twenty-one years ago)

Mark, you never told me why you hated my music so much!!

― dleone (dleone), Tuesday, 24 August 2004 14:27 (twenty-one years ago)

You never asked! ;-)

(That's definitely a joke b/c I do not hate your music. Once I get the new stuff downloaded I'll unload some words on you.)

― Mark (MarkR), Tuesday, 24 August 2004 14:34 (twenty-one years ago)

I don't say anything if it sucks, which it often does. All musicians are needy bastards, but the best of 'em don't give a shit what you say anyway, especially if they're making more money/getting laid more than you.

― eddie hurt (ddduncan), Tuesday, 24 August 2004 15:04 (twenty-one years ago)

I"ve had friends write in the press rather dismissive reviews of my own material and it has never really had any effect on my relationship with them.

I don't expect my friends to necessarily like what i do, and prefer them to be honest. I do expect them to come to at least 1 gig each year in support though even, if they hate my music.

― Savin All My Love 4 u (Savin 4ll my (heart) 4u), Tuesday, 24 August 2004 23:17 (twenty-one years ago)

I never befriend journalists.

― the music mole (colin s barrow), Tuesday, 24 August 2004 23:29 (twenty-one years ago)

when my friends ask me to write about their albums, i usually offer to help them craft a good bio/one-sheet and don't even go near reviewing stuff, as much for the conflict of interest stuff as for the offending opinion stuff.

― ken taylrr (ken taylrr), Wednesday, 25 August 2004 06:05 (twenty-one years ago)

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