can we have bon jovi jokes

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pink likes bon jovi
madonna did bon jovi
jesica simpson can't even spell bon jovi and thought it was an Italian city

― richie bon jovi, Tuesday, 23 November 2004 06:35 (twenty-one years ago)

His real name is Jo(h?)n Bongiovi. Extra jokes are unnecessary

― Sasha (sgh), Tuesday, 23 November 2004 06:38 (twenty-one years ago)

There once was a man named bon jovi
who all of the ladies found grody
so he grew out his hair
then they threw underwear
and begged to be groped by his roadies.

― Forksclovetofu (Forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 23 November 2004 06:42 (twenty-one years ago)

xpost: you misspelled jesica.

― Forksclovetofu (Forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 23 November 2004 06:43 (twenty-one years ago)

A girl I liked once pushed me out a window because I explained to her how Bon Jovi were really really bad.

Luckily, we were on the ground floor.

― Sasha (sgh), Tuesday, 23 November 2004 06:46 (twenty-one years ago)

Why did Bon Jovi cross the road?

Because he fucking sucks.

― Forksclovetofu (Forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 23 November 2004 06:49 (twenty-one years ago)

Just kidding! Slippery When Wet is my sixth grade in pill form.

― Forksclovetofu (Forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 23 November 2004 06:50 (twenty-one years ago)

What do you call it when Bon Jovi is beaten soundly with a metal truncheon?

A good start.

― Forksclovetofu (Forksclovetofu), Tuesday, 23 November 2004 06:52 (twenty-one years ago)

where is the guy who wrote the brilliant "runaway" ?
i downloaded 22 power station demos of jon

― old jersey, Tuesday, 23 November 2004 12:23 (twenty-one years ago)

"22 power station demos of jon"

This is Russell Crowe's new band.

― mark grout (mark grout), Tuesday, 23 November 2004 14:24 (twenty-one years ago)

What's the difference between a counterfeit dollar and John Bon Govi?

Answer: One's a phony buck and the other's a bony f**k!!!

― herbalizer12 (herbalizer12), Tuesday, 23 November 2004 15:11 (twenty-one years ago)

A Bon Jovi Haiku:

Proto hair metal
Fame, so slip’ry when wet,now
livin’ on a prayer

― mottdeterre (mottdeterre), Tuesday, 23 November 2004 17:46 (twenty-one years ago)

What rots in the basement and gives love a bad name?

Jon Benet Jovi

― Pleasant Plains (Pleasant Plains), Tuesday, 23 November 2004 17:51 (twenty-one years ago)

How many Bon Jovi groupies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
.
.
.
.
.
.
Have you seen his groupies? It's better just to screw 'em in the dark.

― mottdeterre (mottdeterre), Tuesday, 23 November 2004 18:06 (twenty-one years ago)

What's better than stabbin' a Bon Jovi?

Nothin', man. Ain't nothin' better.

― andrew m. (andrewmorgan), Tuesday, 23 November 2004 18:11 (twenty-one years ago)

Jessica Simpson is puttering around in her kitchen and decides to clean the coffeemaker while it’s still plugged in. She electrocutes herself and regains consciousness in Hell. Satan says to her, “We offer eternal opportunities that match the idiocy of one’s life. I’ll show you three options, and you may decide.” “M’kay, hee hee hee,” says Jessica. In the first room, a group sits in a darkened theatre and watches Adam Sandler films. “Oh, I can’t follow movies,” Jessica says. Satan takes her to a second room where people are forced to be members of Ashlee Simpson’s backing band. “Ugh, no way,” sneers Jessica. Satan takes her to a third room, where dazed, vacuous people star emptily into The Void. “Wow, this totally rocks,” says Jessica, “count me in!” She no sooner takes her place than a voice comes over the loudspeaker and says, “Break time is over. Back to listening to the Bon Jovi box set.”

― mottdeterre (mottdeterre), Tuesday, 23 November 2004 21:12 (twenty-one years ago)

100,000,000 bon jovi fans can be wrong

― myke boomnoise (myke boomnoise), Tuesday, 23 November 2004 22:36 (twenty-one years ago)

what's black and knocks on windows?

Jon Bon Jovi in a microwave.

― p.j. (Henry), Wednesday, 24 November 2004 03:41 (twenty-one years ago)

what has 2 million black eyes?

the million faces that mr. jovi claims to have rocked

― jake b. (cerybut), Wednesday, 24 November 2004 08:40 (twenty-one years ago)

has anyone on ILM had their face personally rocked by mr. bon jovi?
how did it feel?

― m0stly clean (m0stly clean), Wednesday, 24 November 2004 14:31 (twenty-one years ago)

"22 power station demos of jon"
This is Russell Crowe's new band.

-- mark grout (mark.grou...), November 23rd, 2004.
hahahahahahahahahaha!
isn't it "40 odd foot of new jersey "

― spencers knickers off in a barn, Thursday, 25 November 2004 06:49 (twenty-one years ago)

I just want to commend Forksclovetofu on "grody" portmanteau-ing into "groped" and "roadies," that's quite good.

― joseph cotten (joseph cotten), Thursday, 25 November 2004 07:10 (twenty-one years ago)

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