5 Reasons Why I Love Ryan Adams

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Five Reasons Why I Love Ryan Adams:

1. For the past decade he has attempted to foster a Keith Richards/Shane McGowan cross-over dental problem, crushing up aspirin and stuffing them in his swollen wisdom teeth.

2. He thought that Mariah Carey penned a paean to the Batcave, found out she didn’t, so drafted one himself.

3. He has recorded the full Strokes’ “Is This It” on his four-track, and concedes that his own schtick is “just a bunch of bullshit anyway, it's a bunch of singer/songwriter crap - me telling some stupid fucking story about some stupid fucking bullshit thing.”

4. The critics have rubbed their bare bodies up and down his sexy torso, in thrall to his bland retro Seventies Where’s Wally/Spot The Influence second album, Gold. This is representative of repetition of the Isn’t Anything/Loveless Syndrome. That is, the critics big-up the sequel album indicative of mutual back-patting for spotting the talent and class of the band in the initial release, even though the second album isn’t as good as the first. And, now everyone hates him because he is omniscient and he “has no talent”.

5. He has approximately 84 unreleased albums in the can, with 98 scheduled for release some time in the summer. Prolificity isn’t a virtue?!

Another Lurker, Friday, 22 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

5 Reasons Why I Hate Ryan Adams:

1. For the past decade he has attempted to foster a Keith Richards/Shane McGowan cross-over dental problem, crushing up aspirin and stuffing them in his swollen wisdom teeth.

2. He thought that Mariah Carey penned a paean to the Batcave, found out she didn’t, so drafted one himself.

3. He has recorded the full Strokes’ “Is This It” on his four- track, and concedes that his own schtick is “just a bunch of bullshit anyway, it's a bunch of singer/songwriter crap - me telling some stupid fucking story about some stupid fucking bullshit thing.”

4. The critics have rubbed their bare bodies up and down his sexy torso, in thrall to his bland retro Seventies Where’s Wally/Spot The Influence second album, Gold. This is representative of repetition of the Isn’t Anything/Loveless Syndrome. That is, the critics big-up the sequel album indicative of mutual back-patting for spotting the talent and class of the band in the initial release, even though the second album isn’t as good as the first. And, now everyone hates him because he is omniscient and he “has no talent”.

5. He has approximately 84 unreleased albums in the can, with 98 scheduled for release some time in the summer. Prolificity isn’t a virtue?!

powertonevolume, Friday, 22 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

everyone hates him because he is omniscient

Ubiquitous, I think you mean. Though if he is omniscient, then he knows right now that I think he's a humorless slob out-talented by former bandmate Michael Daly. YA HEAR ME, ADAMS?

Ned Raggett, Friday, 22 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

Oh no, he is omniscient!

powertonevolume, Friday, 22 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

what's with these fanboy postings?

g, Friday, 22 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

What's with these "What's with these fanboy postings?" postings?

Sean Carruthers, Friday, 22 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)

some of his fans should send him some shampoo.

keith, Friday, 22 March 2002 01:00 (twenty-four years ago)


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