Are we inflicting our own musical tastes on our loved ones?

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As it is now the start of the summer holidays my wife and myself have been planning a few day trips to various places in order to stave off the inevitable boredom which tends to set in when children are stuck at home due to the usual wet weather. We found a few interesting places and put these to my daughter, her reaction was a protracted sulk followed by some serious screaming and shouting but the problem was not due to the day trips themselves but the fact that she would be forced to listen to my "horrible" tapes during the journey.

I had no idea this was a problem, I thought she liked "Hex induction hour" and the rest, she sings along to them sometimes although I have noticed that occasionally she is rather quiet on long journeys.(there is a point to all this so please bear with me)

Are we deliberately inflicting our own musical tastes on our loved ones? do we do this unthinkingly or is there a subconcious desire to educate them into loving music that we ourselves love?

Can this be catagorised as "emotional cruelty"? or am I doing her a favour in the long run? I don't play it especially loud and she is allowed occasionally to bring tapes of her own.

Anyone else guilty of this? or am I a bad father?

― Kris England, Wednesday, 10 July 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I'm dragged the woman to London to see The Flaming Lips with me tonight. But she dragged me to Bristol to see Ash in December.

― Nick Southall, Wednesday, 10 July 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

i was forced to attend a david byrne and jim white concert in leeds once

my family miss my music now i no longer live there. well, my mum does anyway. but if i put suede on, she's like, ohhh, can't we have that nice aphex twin instead of this mewling

― gareth, Wednesday, 10 July 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I have tried this. Thus far I have worked out:

My mum finds Gorky's Zygotic Mynci 'jarring'

My dad dislikes the Super Furries, but quite likes OK Computer and Belle and Sebastian

My brothers hate all of it, but particularly Woodbine

None of them like my singing.

― Mr Swygart, Wednesday, 10 July 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

My mum likes Squarepusher. This has never ceased to bother me.

― Matt DC, Wednesday, 10 July 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

I don't remember this being a problem with my family. When I was growing up, we had a radio in the car, no tape player. I don't remember them playing "oldies" stations in the car. It was mostly pop of various sorts, probably more soul/r&b than rock. My mother tended to like that sort of thing well enough and my father didn't have particularly strong tastes one way or another. It was generally pretty harmonious.

― DeRayMi, Wednesday, 10 July 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

My friends' cars have all been infected with my music one way or the other, I have no complaints and neither do they, oddly.

― DG, Wednesday, 10 July 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

For a healthy relationship, a man must keep his women and his music as strictly separated as possible.

1. Don't take her to gigs (ever!)
2. Don't even attempt serious music discussions
3. Don't force her to listen to your music (cars, especially!)
4. Play *her* music instead and learn to tolerate Celine Dion
5. Play her Barry White

If you have children, just accept that they will *hate* your favourite music with a passion. There's nothing you can do about this. Don't attempt to discuss *their* favourite music either. Resist the temptation.

― Siegbran Hetteson, Wednesday, 10 July 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

but if i put suede on, she's like, ohhh, can't we have that nice aphex twin instead of this mewling

A woman after my own heart.

― RickyT, Wednesday, 10 July 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

5. Play her Barry White
If that doesn't work, try Isaac Hayes Hot Buttered Soul (or possibly Gaye's Lets Get It On)

― Lord Custos III, Wednesday, 10 July 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Yes, I know exactly what to put on to clear the house. Borbetomagus works _every_time.

― brg30, Wednesday, 10 July 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

My mum made me tape Space Love by Leila for her, she listens to it in the car when bored with her Ministry of Sound chillout compilations and Enya. My dad has been known to say nice things about Child Psychology by Black Box Recorder and Celebrity Skin by Hole and Pull The Wires From The Wall by the Delgados, and credits himself whenever he catches me listening to any pre-1980 music, grrrrr-ly.

― alex linsdell, Wednesday, 10 July 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

My father played Northern Soul when I was growing up. As a result I never heard any contemporary music (in the 70s). I never sulked. I am very grateful for it actually. It showed me that you should not outgrow music, but hold on to it.

― nathalie, Wednesday, 10 July 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

Also, my dad and i had BRIEF CONVERSATION about Motown Chartbusters CDs the other day, this was unusual thing to happen. Am gratified that his Mike and the Mechanics stuff gets less of an airing than it used to.

― alex linsdell, Wednesday, 10 July 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

my mom regards george crumb as the worst kind of sadism.

― mike bott, Friday, 12 July 2002 00:00 (twenty-three years ago)

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