When a doe-eyed lass blows you off one night only to insist that you call her the next

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wait what

― Jon Williams (ex machina), Saturday, 24 January 2004 22:44 (twenty-two years ago)

And the problem is...?

― Llahtuos Kcin (Nick Southall), Saturday, 24 January 2004 22:46 (twenty-two years ago)

blows you off?

― jed_ (jed), Saturday, 24 January 2004 22:48 (twenty-two years ago)

THE PROBLEM IS THAT IF I EXPECT AN EVENING OF FINE WINE, RISK AND COITAL BLISS IN THE MOONLIGHT AND YOU CANCEL OUR PLANS AT THE LAST MINUTE YOU'RE IN BIG TROUBLE!

― Jon Williams (ex machina), Saturday, 24 January 2004 22:54 (twenty-two years ago)

it's been far too long since a doe-eyed lass blew me off

― Tony Mitchington (Anthony Miccio), Saturday, 24 January 2004 22:57 (twenty-two years ago)

Uncle Nick; tell our friend the specific emergency action one takes in such situations.

― Patrick Kinghorn, Saturday, 24 January 2004 22:59 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm not sure I remember.

― Llahtuos Kcin (Nick Southall), Saturday, 24 January 2004 23:35 (twenty-two years ago)

Filthiness

― @d@mo "1"ington (nordicskilla), Saturday, 24 January 2004 23:51 (twenty-two years ago)

i've hard a girl doing this to be for a month now. breaking plans every goddamn time only to insist we get together "early next week" and then not call and then send an email apologizing and saying "this weekend i really wanna hang out" and everyfucking time i'm like "oh, that's okay. sure that sounds good. talk to you then" but i don't. because she breaks plans at the last goddamn minute. and 2 weeks ago i got picked-up by a girl who seems intent on doing the same - left me standing around like an idiot twice i am so pissed off about this.

i've stopped returning their calls/emails after having enough last wednesday.

― dyson (dyson), Saturday, 24 January 2004 23:51 (twenty-two years ago)

Ideally, I want to have sex with her and then tell her she's a jerk.

― Jon Williams (ex machina), Saturday, 24 January 2004 23:52 (twenty-two years ago)

Calum got into an American university?

― Llahtuos Kcin (Nick Southall), Saturday, 24 January 2004 23:55 (twenty-two years ago)

There's this thing called alcohol.

― @d@ml (nordicskilla), Saturday, 24 January 2004 23:56 (twenty-two years ago)

I totally understand, Jon, except in my case, she was dough-eyed.

― donut bitch (donut), Saturday, 24 January 2004 23:57 (twenty-two years ago)

As in cookie dough. Chocolate chip cookie dough.. all over her eyes. She made little pupils out of the chocolate chips.

It was a bit weird.

― donut bitch (donut), Saturday, 24 January 2004 23:57 (twenty-two years ago)

http://www.craigscookiejars.com/craigscookiejars/la_pot_face.jpg
you don't bring me flowers anymore, db!

― Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Saturday, 24 January 2004 23:59 (twenty-two years ago)

yargh! http://www.craigscookiejars.com/craigscookiejars/la_pot_face.jpg

― Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Saturday, 24 January 2004 23:59 (twenty-two years ago)

yes. sex was my objective aswell. but i realize now that it requires far too much work. much more than usual. had she eyes of nugget however it may be a different story.

― dyson (dyson), Sunday, 25 January 2004 00:03 (twenty-two years ago)

Jon: Call her, and very bluntly ask if she's going to fulfill your needs. If she says yes, give her the benefit of the doubt.

(i have learned to seduce girls through homemade pasta sauce, quesadillas and potluck dinnners.)

― Ian Johnson (orion), Sunday, 25 January 2004 00:03 (twenty-two years ago)

She did tell me to call her. Maybe she was put off by how drunk I was last night?

― Jon Williams (ex machina), Sunday, 25 January 2004 00:05 (twenty-two years ago)

Were you drunk enough to think sex ON THE RISK BOARD would be a good idea?

― Ian Johnson (orion), Sunday, 25 January 2004 00:06 (twenty-two years ago)

bad idea, you'll be shitting calvalry for a week.

― teeny (teeny), Sunday, 25 January 2004 00:07 (twenty-two years ago)

"hey jon, what's this...stain on Siam?"

― Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Sunday, 25 January 2004 00:09 (twenty-two years ago)

Semantic differences between UK and US colloquial sex slang: Classic or Dud?

"So she gave me oral sex and then asked me to phone her the next day; it's unfair, I feel so used!"

― Llahtuos Kcin (Nick Southall), Sunday, 25 January 2004 00:10 (twenty-two years ago)

ha ha
i've done that¡ (risk board sex, not the sitting cavalry thing)
but it did take me forever to clean up.

― dyson (dyson), Sunday, 25 January 2004 00:11 (twenty-two years ago)

Magic: The Smothering

― donut bitch (donut), Sunday, 25 January 2004 00:14 (twenty-two years ago)

I hate this, especially when it's like "no, not tonight, but ask me again."

― bnw (bnw), Sunday, 25 January 2004 02:33 (twenty-two years ago)

Magic: The Flaking

― donut bitch (donut), Sunday, 25 January 2004 02:37 (twenty-two years ago)

you're all ignoring the root of the problem: the girl jon wants to pork is not his interweb stalker.

― Ian Johnson (orion), Sunday, 25 January 2004 02:39 (twenty-two years ago)

's no fun if she already likes you.

― bnw (bnw), Sunday, 25 January 2004 02:41 (twenty-two years ago)

The two separate tales could unexpectedly conjoin into a very happy ending.

― Gear! (Gear!), Sunday, 25 January 2004 03:02 (twenty-two years ago)

A friend told me that she had to meet this girl tonight because she'd been "blowing her off all week". My inner child made me giggle like a girl.

― Johnney B (Johnney B), Sunday, 25 January 2004 10:32 (twenty-two years ago)

It means that you are her "back up" option and she's been lucking out so far

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Sunday, 25 January 2004 12:10 (twenty-two years ago)

There was a thread a few months ago about being stood up. Sometimes people have a legitimate reason. Sometimes they're jerking you around. (Whatever happened to that anonymous poster dating the bloke with the black eye anyway?) Need actual details, rather than just vague demands about wanting to have sex.

― the river fleet, Sunday, 25 January 2004 13:44 (twenty-two years ago)

What's a legit reason?

― Silly Sailor (Andrew Thames), Sunday, 25 January 2004 13:47 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm trying to remember what the bloke said in that other thread. He was ill or he had to work overtime or his car broke down or something like that.

― the river fleet, Sunday, 25 January 2004 13:49 (twenty-two years ago)

this thread, too

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Sunday, 25 January 2004 14:56 (twenty-two years ago)

so what reasons would a person have to repeatedly jerk around seemingly decent folks like myself and jon¿

― dyson (dyson), Sunday, 25 January 2004 18:29 (twenty-two years ago)

if you take shit people will give it. they might not even realize it's shit they're giving you. so don't take it.

― Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Sunday, 25 January 2004 18:30 (twenty-two years ago)

Good news! I blew her off last night!

― Jon Williams (ex machina), Sunday, 25 January 2004 19:06 (twenty-two years ago)

I should also note that you shouldn't give shit either.

― Anthony Miccio (Anthony Miccio), Sunday, 25 January 2004 19:11 (twenty-two years ago)

Good news! I blew her off last night!
-- Jon Williams (william...), January 25th, 2004.

I should also note that you shouldn't give shit either.
-- Anthony Miccio (anthonymicci...), January 25th, 2004.

Ouch. My dirty mind has helped both of these messages hurt my head.

― donut bitch (donut), Sunday, 25 January 2004 19:13 (twenty-two years ago)

ignore anothony's last remark. i applaud you jon - welcome to the dark side.

― dyson (dyson), Sunday, 25 January 2004 19:14 (twenty-two years ago)

You'll know you've won when everyone hates each other.

― bnw (bnw), Sunday, 25 January 2004 21:23 (twenty-two years ago)

How dirty is my apartment allowed to be when said lass comes over? The bed is is unmade and there's piles of music making shit EVERYWHERE. Also, some button up shirts and gloves and hats on the couch. The floor is a little muddy (and linoleum) and dusty.

Also, who knows what the kitchen looks like.

― Jon Williams (ex machina), Sunday, 25 January 2004 21:49 (twenty-two years ago)

How dirty is my apartment allowed to be when said lass comes over?

Not at all. Start cleaning.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 25 January 2004 21:54 (twenty-two years ago)

clean up the dirty clothes & dishes. clutter is okay, filth is not.

― Ian Johnson (orion), Sunday, 25 January 2004 21:54 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm in a UNIX lab, not at home, you insensitive clod.

I'm like 3 years older and wiser than her though. Doesn't the fact that I'm a PUNK ROCKER make it ok to have broken guitar strings and dust bunnies everywhere ok?

Mental note: throw something over used condoms in trash!

Ian, the clothing is semi clean, but not put away

― Jon Williams (ex machina), Sunday, 25 January 2004 21:56 (twenty-two years ago)

I'm in a UNIX lab, not at home, you insensitive clod.

GRR. ;-)

Ian's clutter vs. filth point is well taken. And for heaven's sake scrub up the bathroom a bit.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Sunday, 25 January 2004 22:01 (twenty-two years ago)

oh fuckkkkkkkk the bathroom!

I better finish this project instead of posting on ILX!!!!!

http://www.belarusaid.co.uk/dirty%20toilet.jpg

― Jon Williams (ex machina), Sunday, 25 January 2004 22:04 (twenty-two years ago)

Does my "eclectic decor" make up for the fact that I live in a cement and tile shithole with salt licks all over the floors?

― Jon Williams has a fucking posseeeeeeeeeeeeeee (ex machina), Sunday, 25 January 2004 22:04 (twenty-two years ago)

Skipping 187 messages at this point... Click here if you want to load them all.

ken, there really isnt much difference between a c-man thread and a jon williams thread to tell you the truth.

― todd swiss (eliti), Wednesday, 21 April 2004 03:18 (twenty-two years ago)

thats mean, jons ok, come on.

― gareth (gareth), Wednesday, 21 April 2004 06:05 (twenty-two years ago)

I think Jon's threads are a hoot, personally. Maybe it's because they're so recognizably "college" but so foreign from my personal experience of college.

― Prude (Prude), Wednesday, 21 April 2004 06:08 (twenty-two years ago)

yeah yeah, it was mean.

i guess he is not as bad as c-man, but on par with aja.

― todd swiss (eliti), Wednesday, 21 April 2004 06:57 (twenty-two years ago)

I don't like Foo Fighters

― Acid! Polizei! (ex machina), Wednesday, 21 April 2004 15:50 (twenty-two years ago)

what?

― gygax! (gygax!), Wednesday, 21 April 2004 15:53 (twenty-two years ago)

Also, my other friend won't tell me what she writes on her livejournal :(((

― Acid! Polizei! (ex machina), Wednesday, 21 April 2004 18:05 (twenty-two years ago)

Wait, you don't like "Everlong" by Foo Fighters?

― gygax! (gygax!), Wednesday, 21 April 2004 18:30 (twenty-two years ago)

I like it well enough.

― Acid! Polizei! (ex machina), Wednesday, 21 April 2004 19:40 (twenty-two years ago)

five months pass...

I've been told of this thread, and now I have seen it. For the record.

― AaronHz (AaronHz), Friday, 15 October 2004 01:18 (twenty-one years ago)

my gf listens to hot hot heat and the postal service and she's lovely.

― the surface noise (slight return) (electricsound), Friday, 15 October 2004 01:30 (twenty-one years ago)

i think this thread is amazing.

― caitlin oh no (caitxa1), Friday, 15 October 2004 01:34 (twenty-one years ago)

Mandee just made a joke about the manatee thing on AIM tonight, so voila.

― AaronHz (AaronHz), Friday, 15 October 2004 01:36 (twenty-one years ago)

― sometimes i like to pretend i am very small and warm (ex machina), Friday, 15 October 2004 15:30 (twenty-one years ago)

This thread makes me sad.

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Friday, 15 October 2004 16:10 (twenty-one years ago)

I still hate this.

― bnw (bnw), Friday, 15 October 2004 17:07 (twenty-one years ago)

Who knew I could envy Jon?

― R.H.E.T.O.R.I.B.A.R.M.S. (Barima), Friday, 15 October 2004 18:00 (twenty-one years ago)

two months pass...

http://www.bcpl.net/~mljones/images/P146.jpg
ihttp://www.bcpl.net/~mljones/images/P130.jpg
http://www.bcpl.net/~mljones/images/P146.jpg

― LSD ARISTOCAT (ex machina), Friday, 7 January 2005 03:20 (twenty-one years ago)

jon plz post more about your liaisons with corny indie fuxxx.

― caitlin oh no (caitxa1), Friday, 7 January 2005 03:57 (twenty-one years ago)

i only lust after WEEN and PINK FLOYD fans now.

― LSD ARISTOCAT (ex machina), Friday, 7 January 2005 04:01 (twenty-one years ago)

i take back everything i said on this thread.

― t0dd swiss, Friday, 7 January 2005 04:33 (twenty-one years ago)

nine months pass...

http://www.londonstimes.us/toons/cartoons/Simeon_ManateeLove3.jpg http://3d-decoupage.com/images/52131_ManateeLove_Pg71_WEB.jpg http://www.manateelovesociety.com/art/manatee_logo-purple.jpg

― Internet Nice Guy (ex machina), Friday, 7 October 2005 11:50 (twenty years ago)

why is newanswers.php slow?!!?

― Jonothong Williamsmang (ex machina), Friday, 7 October 2005 11:51 (twenty years ago)

IS SHE A FAETTY BITCH OR DO YOU LOVE HER???

― lol, Friday, 7 October 2005 11:55 (twenty years ago)

easily one of the best threads ever.

― latebloomer (latebloomer), Friday, 7 October 2005 12:33 (twenty years ago)

There were a bunch like this:

WOMEN OF ILX: If some random sketchy dude handed you a note that said "HI UR CUET PLZ CALL ME"...

― Jonothong Williamsmang (ex machina), Friday, 7 October 2005 14:46 (twenty years ago)

one month passes...

Revive!

OK, so I went on two dates with this girl who is:

4 years younger
Much posher
Probably too good looking to date me
Probably somewhat more traditional views on dating/relationships

However, we hit it off and she left me an email before Thanksgiving (in response to an email asking if she wanted to hang out the night before we went home) indicating that she* would call me after she got back from break. She emailed me Monday night, told me about her break, but no mention of calling, hanging out, wanting to see me etc. The closest I got to anything like that was that she mentioned that she was "just hanging out" until her big photo shoot Wednesday.

Now, I have decided that I don't want to seem overeager/pushy so I have not replied to her email nor called her. She has never initiated a phone call to me ever. So I'm thinking on waiting until after the weekend to call her (unless I hear from her). Is that too long? Also, my ex is visiting this weekend, so I totally can't imply that I am boning my ex. I really don't want to come across like a Nicholas Cage character so playing it cool is urgent/key.

Also, we have not addressed the fact that I want to bag her; although I did try to lure her back to my place last time we hung out (drunk at Sunday brunch). We hug hi and bye now.

OK, go.

― 'you' vs. 'radio gnome invisible 3' FITE (ex machina), Wednesday, 30 November 2005 16:55 (twenty years ago)

"posher"

― dabnis coleman's ghost (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 30 November 2005 16:59 (twenty years ago)

it's kate, jon, isn't it.

― dabnis coleman's ghost (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 30 November 2005 16:59 (twenty years ago)

you can tell us.

― dabnis coleman's ghost (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 30 November 2005 16:59 (twenty years ago)

be a man.

― Special Agent Dale Koopa (orion), Wednesday, 30 November 2005 16:59 (twenty years ago)

it's kate, jon, isn't it.

Does "posher" mean "filled with more cottage cheese"?

― 'you' vs. 'radio gnome invisible 3' FITE (ex machina), Wednesday, 30 November 2005 17:01 (twenty years ago)

ideally.

― dabnis coleman's ghost (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 30 November 2005 17:01 (twenty years ago)

Kate isn't 4 years younger than me and I don't have horsehair! Also, this girl goes to temple at least once a month. WTF

― 'you' vs. 'radio gnome invisible 3' FITE (ex machina), Wednesday, 30 November 2005 17:02 (twenty years ago)

i don't know how old kate is or what religion she is! who do i look like, jaymc?

― dabnis coleman's ghost (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 30 November 2005 17:03 (twenty years ago)

Kate looks like a fat old broad. Go read one of those WDYLL threads!

― 'you' vs. 'radio gnome invisible 3' FITE (ex machina), Wednesday, 30 November 2005 17:04 (twenty years ago)

nein danke.

― dabnis coleman's ghost (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 30 November 2005 17:04 (twenty years ago)

Anyway, back to my original point...

― 'you' vs. 'radio gnome invisible 3' FITE (ex machina), Wednesday, 30 November 2005 17:05 (twenty years ago)

anyway, i don't think the weekend is too long to wait.

― dabnis coleman's ghost (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 30 November 2005 17:05 (twenty years ago)

yeah dude just play it cool/safe
definitely for the best

― nervous (cochere), Wednesday, 30 November 2005 17:06 (twenty years ago)

especially if you're gonna be getting some from your ex this weekend, wtf? don't be greedy!

― dabnis coleman's ghost (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 30 November 2005 17:06 (twenty years ago)

wait are you actually going to bone your ex or not

― nervous (cochere), Wednesday, 30 November 2005 17:06 (twenty years ago)

Yea, maybe sunday night or monday afternoon? I want to go to this at moma

http://www.tate.org.uk/liverpool/exhibitions/janetcardiff/

xpost, yea the ex and I are feeling things out even though she lives in B0st0n.

― 'you' vs. 'radio gnome invisible 3' FITE (ex machina), Wednesday, 30 November 2005 17:07 (twenty years ago)

monday afternoon seems good.

― dabnis coleman's ghost (dubplatestyle), Wednesday, 30 November 2005 17:09 (twenty years ago)

oh well yeah i guess i'd just try to play it safe and stay out of posh girl's way, and kind of ignore her ,while your ex is around. then when your ex leaves you can call her if she hasn't gotten in touch by then

so basically, yeah, what jess just said

― nervous (cochere), Wednesday, 30 November 2005 17:10 (twenty years ago)

Ex in town through Sunday night now :x

― 'you' vs. 'radio gnome invisible 3' FITE (ex machina), Wednesday, 30 November 2005 19:21 (twenty years ago)

Well I haven't replied

― GET EQUIPPED WITH A GOOD EXCUSE (ex machina), Monday, 5 December 2005 19:56 (twenty years ago)

save yourself for val3ry.

― Special Agent Dale Koopa (orion), Monday, 5 December 2005 19:58 (twenty years ago)

"just hanging out" = "i'm bored, please call me before i bone someone else out of sheer desperation"

― Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Monday, 5 December 2005 20:00 (twenty years ago)

tracer otm.

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 05:28 (twenty years ago)

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